Hear My Heart Burst Again
by Supsi85
Summary: Starts at the end of 2x13. After Emma is being taken away Ann decides to pay Harris a visit and AU events follow. I'm an Ann/Bobby shipper at heart but I guess we all have our guilty pleasures we can't quite explain;)
1. This is the End

_Author's note: I'd like to thank/blame marysunshine81 for the fact I'm having all these Ann/Harris feelings lately. Thank you;) This was originally going to be a one-shot but thanks to the lovely feedback (and my somewhat sick and twisted mind) I ended up making an actual story out of it. A shocking twist ahead at some point!  
_

When asked what she was like Harris Ryland would always refrain from answering. It wasn't that he didn't know Ann, for he knew her better than anyone. It was for the fact too much time had passed since she started playing another part. That role of Mrs. Ewing she was now known for messed with his head. In his mind what best described Ann was the words "unfinished business".

Which was why he didn't hesitate to let her in on that night even though it had been a stressful day, not to mention the last time she had entered the doors of his house she had shot him. And he was also expecting Emma but judging by Ann's late night visit he could already guess she had yet again meddled with his plans.

"Your bag." Harris demanded before even looking at her. He didn't expect her to shoot him again but at the same time he needed to know where her hands were at all times.

Ann sighed loudly and rolled her eyes as she handed her bag over. Instead of checking it Harris placed the bag on a shelf and turned back to give her a proper look. They were standing a foot apart in the hallway and it was interesting to him how she didn't try to back off this time. He supposed she felt she had made her point on where they stood loud and clear on her last visit.

"I just want to let you know that no matter what mind games you are playing with Emma, she will not be returning to you." Ann's voice was stern. It always was until he invaded her mind and her whole carefully practiced act would shatter.

"What did you do Ann, lock her up?" Harris was curious as to what could have possibly been a stronger incentive for his daughter than the need for her medication. "The lengths you go to in order to force Emma to have a normal relationship with you…"

"You know Harris, that's funny coming from you." Ann shot back. "After all you had to drug her just so she would stay with you."

He looked down over her body before responding . "You know Annie, not everyone who takes drugs is like you. You missed your chance because you chose those pills over your daughter. You need to accept that."

"That's not true and you know it." Ann trembled a bit. She was starting to crack and Harris knew it. It was the perfect moment to change tactics.

"Come, sit down." He pointed towards the living room. "I'm sure you didn't come all the way here just to tell me to stay away from Emma. Let me hear what you have to say and maybe we can figure out some sort of a solution to all this."

Ann watched his friendly smile warily and Harris saw how she once again wanted to believe him. Showing confidence had always worked so well on her. He could have made her agree to any kind of deal as long as he was convincing enough. Her endless optimism and will to see good in everyone partly amused him but most of all it was what made him fall in love with her in the first place. That kind of light in his life had always been rare and once he had caught a glimpse of it he was not willing to let go, ever.

Ann shifted awkwardly eyeing at Harris and then at room.

"Aren't you going to inspect me?"

As soon as she had said it the realization filled her eyes and Harris grinned. Oh this was just glorious.

"Do you want me to?" He took this as an opportunity reach out for the top button of her blouse, twisting it between his thumb and index finger while looking at her suggestively. When she pursed her lips tightly he then let his finger slide down her chest and took extra pleasure in seeing how she fidgeted under his touch. Her resolve turned out to be to not say anything, which was smart on her part.

"You know Annie, if you want this little game to end all you have to do is finish it." He glanced back up still holding his finger between her breasts to preserve that small, yet tense connection between them.

Ann's eyes flamed. "You are…"

Harris let his other hand travel down the back of her shirt.

"I am what, Ann?"

Her eyes were now shooting in every direction as she nervously tried to gather her earlier self-assurance. Harris chose to take advantage of her current state.

"All it takes is one time." He breathed out while she was avoiding his gaze but unable to move. "You'll give me one time and then I'll leave you in peace, you and Emma both."

She closed her eyes as if she was trying to pray.

"So…what do you say?"

She remained still, her eyes closed. Clearly there were no coherent thoughts left in her. Harris took hold of her chin to force her to face him.

"You already made your choice, Ann, when you didn't leave."

She unintentionally looked at his lips and her mouth fell slightly open at all the thoughts that were apparently rushing through her mind. Harris immediately moved his hand to her neck and closed that small distance between them by kissing her. The warmth of her mouth quickly filled him with more energy and he was unable to stop himself, fully aware that there still was a chance she might back off. He kissed her again and again taking in every bit of that feeling that was now vibrating through his entire body. She was fighting to hold her composure and Harris grabbed at her waist making her hips come into contact with his, to let her know stopping was not an option anymore.

He then ended the kiss to have a look at his handiwork. Ann's eyes showed a mixture of lust, begging and bleeding. He could have so easily given her a way out of this but where would the fun be in that. Up until the moment she had shown up on his doorstep he had been willing to let everything go but now she was taking Emma away from him again and so the rules had changed.

He gave her a knowing look, that what had just been exchanged between them could have counted as every sin in the book and she might as well follow through.

Ann's eyes scanned the space around them and Harris smiled contently.

"This way." He held out his hand but Ann looked at him angrily and walked by herself into the pointed direction. Harris sighed with amusement and followed her until they had reached his bedroom.

He shut the door behind them with more power than was necessary and Ann quickly turned around shaken by the sound. She had not forgotten about his temper.

He took pleasure in seeing how fast he had yet again managed to shake off all her certainty. She would not have the upper hand, not even in his bed.

So many things he wanted to say to her, to force her to drown in her defeat, but he rejected all of them. Let the moment play itself out.

Harris gestured at Ann to take off her shirt and she started unbuttoning it unsure of what to do with herself. It was finally happening, and faster than the time she had tricked him with that tape. He watched her drop the shirt on the floor and before she realized it he had stepped forth to quickly remove her bra. She trembled at his unexpected moves and avoided his gaze by looking down. Sneering he brought her face back up to make her watch as he slowly removed his shirt in turn. Seeing her in that position, the moment could not have been more arousing and he was doing his best to make it last as long as possible. She was clearly fighting not to show any emotion but he could see the spark and anger flash in her eyes, originating from somewhere deep inside.

He stepped forward to kiss her and this time he let his hands wander over her entire body. Pressing her against him to feel the warmth of her body over his he pushed his tongue inside and savored the exquisite taste that was Ann. She took hold of his upper arms and Harris was soon desperate to break free from the confining clothing but it was not the time.

Still invading her mouth he started unbuttoning her jeans and smirked as his fingers met with their destination that was more than ready for him. He used his other hand to take hold of her waist as he continued to stroke her. When he broke the kiss Ann moaned softly and with one swift movement he pulled down her jeans and underwear with them. She shivered at what was happening as Harris pushed her to the edge of the bed. When she was sitting down he quickly took off her boots and the last remaining clothes before positioning himself over her with one knee on each side.

As he continued to move his fingers inside her he couldn't help but admire the effect he had on Ann. All her reluctance was gone, as he had always known it one day would be, and she had now closed her eyes to enjoy the growing feeling. With each stroke her chest heaved and Harris felt victory was upon him.

"Good girl Annie." He whispered trying hard not to show his eagerness. He could not let her see she still held the upper hand. He had to play this one well.

"Now look at me."

Ann slowly lifted her head and as Harris met her eyes his lips curled into a fascinated smile. He instantly moved the position of his fingers and started stroking her upper walls. Seeing how her eyes shot open for a moment brought him another victory in his mind. This was slowly beating all his fantasies. He gave her an approving grin and kissed her gently. Ann responded weakly and Harris decided to raise the stakes. He grabbed hold of her hair at the back of her neck as he pushed his tongue inside all the while slowly stroking her depths. Everything about her was so warm and he already knew the joyous torture would end with an explosion. Harris pulled his tongue out and pressed his forehead against hers feeling her ever stronger heartbeat.

It was time to test her.

"I want you to hurt me, Annie." He panted as he continued to push his fingers inside.

Ann did not respond, nor did she open her eyes.

"No?" He said still looking down. Ann whimpered at his touch unable to form any words. That was the woman who had not so long ago pulled a gun at him with an intention to kill. Harris smiled contently and took his fingers out making her gasp.

"Now Annie, will you?" He held those fingers before her now wide open eyes.

Ann was almost hypnotized by him and obediently opened her mouth. Harris smiled his victorious smile as he slid them inside. She sucked on them gently and continued to circle her tongue around the tips. It was almost too much and Harris had to end it shortly. He pulled them out and grabbed her hair again using the other hand to unzip his pants. He could have let that moment go on forever. Ann was staring at him expectantly, not leaving his eyes for a second. He let go of her and when he was done taking his trousers off he slid his right hand down her thigh, watching her, letting the anticipation grow. She was waiting.

He took her by the waist to move her further back on the bed and then climbed on top of her admiring every inch of her body as he went. He couldn't wait anymore.

He stroked her hair as he entered her and watched her eyes close as she took in the old and familiar feeling.

"Annie, I want you to look at me." His face was above hers and he got to watch closely as her eyes shot open at his voice while he was slowly pushing into her. It could not get better than this.

They were now gazing at each other, Ann's eyes filled with lust with a hint of anger and Harris's with satisfaction as he kept moving inside of her. Something about her eyes always made him lose himself a bit. It took a great deal of restraint on his part to not give in and tell her how she would always have a hold on him like no one else. But the net he had entangled her in was weak and he knew it could all fall apart at any moment. And so he continued to do what he had long since ceased to dream of doing.

Harris reached down to kiss her neck and let his thumb brush over her nipple. As he kept moving down her neck circling it with his tongue and pausing to gently blow warm air on those spots he could feel Ann's back arch. He pushed her back down using his hips and moved onto the other nipple again brushing it until it hardened. Ann panted underneath him, completely surrendered and letting him do what he wished. Harris found it increasingly hard not to grab her by the hair and finish right then and there, to show her exactly what kind of an explosive effect she had on him.

He lifted his head in order to see those hypnotizing eyes of hers again but they were shut. Her lips were halfway parted and he reached out to place two fingers on them.

"Annie…look at me."

He was almost too breathless to speak from all the sensations she was giving him down below but somehow managed to continue as Ann did what was told.

"Take them in…show me…"

He pushed his fingers in and she immediately sucked on them. Harris couldn't help but gasp loudly at her sudden enthusiasm. She went on to move up and down over their length and he was soon on the edge forcing himself to stop. He pulled them out and placed his hands by the sides of her head thrusting into her harder. Ann threw her head back and panted at an increasing volume and Harris slowed down again.

"Annie, I told you to look at me."

She let out a high pitched voice that quieted down into something that resembled sobbing and panting.

"I'm sorry." She whispered almost inaudibly.

"What is that?" He breathed out taking a moment to realize his newest triumph.

"I'm sorry, Harris." She said out louder her eyes fixed on his.

Harris grinned. "That is very sweet Annie, but it doesn't quite cut it."

Ann looked at him the hint of anger in her lustful eyes now replaced by a flash of horror. Her endless uncertainly about him, even when sharing the same bed, satisfied Harris more than she would ever know. He started pushing harder again enjoying the sight before him. She would not let her eyes leave his gaze, yet the rest of her body was in a world of its own, chest rising, hands grabbing at the sheets as if she was about to fall off and her hips moving up and down to match his speed. She was near and he reached down to aid her. When she felt his touch down on her core she cried out and clearly struggled to follow his instructions.

"I want you to look at me when you come…Annie…you understand?"

She whimpered something in response and Harris decided she was closed enough. He took her hands and placed them above her head taking a firm hold of them as he continued to move inside her at an increasing pace. Their faces were now inches apart and Ann was fully obeying him.

"Mmmm it feels so good…Annie." If only she knew.

Ann's lips parted, silently at first, and soon after her whole body shook and clenched around him as she cried out still staring at him. He held her in place using his entire body and relishing the divine sight below him, Ann's beautiful body completely in his grasp, her lips full, her eyes glowing and her face showing nothing but contentment and gratitude. His fantasy had been fulfilled and it was every bit as glorious as he had expected it to be.

When her body had somewhat recovered he pointed at her to get up. Ann looked confused for a second but his intentions soon dawned upon her. Harris sat down at the edge of the bed and Ann kneeled down before him. He was done talking and all he wanted was his release. She didn't intend to make him wait as she quickly took him in her mouth and proceeded to work his length as she had first done with his fingers. Harris knew he wouldn't last long and he was determined to make the most of it. And so he grabbed her by the hair aiding her at the right speed while using the other hand to stay upright. Never had he dared to dream of having her in this position again. He didn't really need to aid her for he knew what she was capable of but holding her head with one hand while nearing his peak was an incredible feeling and that thought was what finally did it for him.

"Annie…" He let out and hunched forward taking hold of her with both hands. Ann pushed his legs down and her tongue travelled over his length while she let him come inside. When eventually there was nothing left in him he let go and fell back down on the bed panting heavily still feeling the sensation of her lips all over him. And all he could think about at that moment was that Bobby Ewing was a damn lucky man.

Ann then released him and followed him onto the bed. As he lay down still recovering from everything she had evoked in him he could feel her eyes on him. He rolled his head to see Ann lie on her side in all her glory watching him with an unreadable expression.

"Every once in a while Annie, you will come back here."

Ann didn't respond nor did she show anything on her face. Lucky for Harris he could always read her mind.

"I should go home." Ann said as she calmly got up to collect her clothes off the floor.

Harris grinned to himself for he knew as long as they were both alive and breathing she would always come back.


	2. Swept Away, I'm Stolen

She was a vision, no doubt about that. In any crowd of people she would never fail to stand out and it wasn't only for the length of her graceful figure he had always admired. It was also for the simple but elegant style and the mesmeric green eyes that would make any man melt had they possessed the courage to go talk to her. Such was the fear for her beauty that they would opt for one of those southern belles with what he found to be perfectly mediocre looks. Harris Ryland however was a fearless man who would only go for the best, and so he had gone for Ann.

Charming her had been easy for every old trick in the book worked on her as if they had never been tested before. She was soon under his spell, a kind and understanding woman who was willing to do anything he asked. He didn't ask a lot because he never had to. She was there to cook for him, to engage in fascinating late night conversations about current topics and when the evenings came to close she would wait for him to tell her what it was he needed on that particular night.

Before he knew it he had fallen hard and the once fearless man was now anything but. When she was with him men everywhere would gaze at her. She never took notice of it but he knew what all those wandering eyes were doing and it drove him mad. Who did they think they were to assume they even stood a chance at claiming a stake at his most precious possession? Harris slowly started to realize that having brought her into that society and given her a chance to shine meant he could lose her just as easily as he had gained her. He decided he would not let that happen, he would hide her and he would make her lose that shine that captured the attention of many. Only then could he be certain she would be his forever.

In hindsight he knew he was never that close to losing her until his own fears combined with his mother's remarks made him lose all sense of reality. They cost him everything in the end and now that Ann knew what he was capable of she would never return for good. The best he could hope for were moments for those could never be taken away. The moment they had shared the week before was something she would keep to herself for the rest of her life. She would never tell a soul, not even the man she had agreed to spend the rest of her life with and for Harris that was the ultimate prize.

He watched as she walked around the store long heels clanking against the hardwood floor. Oh how he loved to see her in boots like those. By the end of their marriage she had given up on wearing them as she had grown insecure about her height again. It had bothered him but he could not risk telling her how stunning she looked in them for she might have fled. It was just one of those countless things his feelings for her had cost him. But now she had embraced every aspect of her beauty and it showed in the clothes she was wearing, the jeans combined with a low cut red sweater showed off her curves in a way he would never get tired of watching. In all his life he had never met a woman who carried their everyday clothes quite like Ann. And yet here she was by herself looking at fabrics and desperately trying to act as if this was an important task for her. What a mundane life she must have led since she walked out on him.

He quietly walked closer in order to have his full effect on her before she would notice and quite possibly run away to keep her feelings from surfacing. When he was right behind her he could see her stiffen even before he spoke.

"Making changes in your bedroom, Annie?" Harris's voice was low and his words had the desired impact. She didn't make one move and he knew at once she was fighting a battle on the inside, waiting for him to make his move because she had nothing prepared. He placed his hand on her lower back carefully but at the same time imperceptibly watching out for any curious eyes and continued.

"I thought I told you once, appearances change but the soul stays constant."

This time she responded by quickly breaking free from his touch and straightened her sweater as if she had just been caught doing something dirty.

"I don't even want to know how you found me, Harris." She hissed as she kept looking around in mild panic.

"Trust me, you don't." He sneered.

She finally looked at him for the first time and her eyes widened slightly before she spoke with fake self-assurance.

"You told me you would stay away."

"Well Annie…" He paused to look down as if he hadn't already assessed the sight from distance. "I was going to but that just wouldn't be right now would it?"

"I don't need you in my life, Harris."

His eyes got serious as he took in her words. "There is needing, and then there is wanting. I'm sure you know the difference."

She swallowed still staring at him.

"There is also _detesting_, one thing I have certainly made clear." She shot back but Harris's gaze remained unchanged.

"Your actions speak a different language, Annie."

She stood still, her eyes practically begging for mercy.

….

Harris held her in place against the wall, fingers cupping her chin and his thumb moving up to her lower lip. Marveling at the sight before him he ran his thumb over Ann's full lips and watched as her eyes closed in anticipation while her legs wrapped tighter around his waist to pull him deeper inside her. The sweet torture was pushing her to the edge in a way Harris had never seen before and he grew all the more fascinated by that side of her. He had discovered Ann's need for him was stronger than she had ever let on before, or maybe it was rekindled by all those years she had lived in boredom, never once feeling his touch.

It was hard work keeping her in that position but seeing how her entire body shivered from the unexpected sensations was all the gratification he needed. Slowly moving his hands down he took hold of her thighs and pushed into her hard. The way she moaned and dug her nails into his shoulders made it all the more difficult for Harris to prolong their pleasure. He buried his face into the curve of her neck as he pulled back slightly and when Ann wrapped her arms around him he pushed back into her groaning loudly. Being wrapped in her arms and legs brought him peace in a way he had not known for a long time but this was something she would never know. He would continue to let her believe she was the one being toyed around.

He freed his other hand to pleasure her gently and enjoyed watching Ann bite her lip as he circled his fingers at her front. She was putty in his hands, right where he wanted her.

"Annie…" He called quietly.

"Mmmmm…" Ann let out her eyes closed.

He waited in silence, still working to build her up.

Eventually Ann opened her eyes allowing him to have that connection which aroused him even more. He grinned a little at the reality of it all and then grabbed her quickly bringing her down to the bed. Ann cried out in a mixture of surprise and excitement but the traces of those emotions soon left her eyes as she saw Harris's serious face upon her. The sounds she made had just given him an unwanted flashback to a day when she was all his and all the emotions started taking over his mind. He chose to keep anger in order to push everything else back.

"What is it Annie?" Harris smiled smugly. "Not used to this?"

Ann's eyes opened wide as Harris took a firm grip at her behind and used his left hand to take hold of the top of her head before thrusting into her hard. Unable to respond to the force she merely gasped and he kept on going, watching her long slender body take on a life of its own. Her breathing was ragged and her forehead glistened from the growing sensations her body was experiencing. They were both near and Harris reluctantly slowed down for there was one more thing he graved. Panting he ran his lips down her neck and then rose slightly using his elbows to support him. Ann's eyes fluttered open to face his gaze. She looked so wary Harris had the instant desire to bring her over the edge right there and then but he managed to restrain himself.

"Touch me." He ordered.

Ann's eyes quickly travelled from his arms down to his chest trying to come to some sort of a decision. Harris watched her intensely.

"Anywhere…"

Ann glanced back up and then without leaving his gaze she brought her hands to his shoulders. She had done that before but it certainly didn't take away from the effect it had on him. His insides were all ablaze as her hands carefully wandered to his chest in an effort to figure out what it was that he wanted. Feeling the warmth of her hands moving over his body was something he had yearned for years and it was every bit as sweet as he had expected. Licking his lips he closed his eyes to take in as much as he could.

When she started moving closer to his face he grabbed her hands and brought them back down. That he could save for another time. The release was already long overdue.

"Now Annie…" He started pushing.

"Mmmmm…" Her eyes told of need for release. She was so close to letting go completely.

"I want you to say my name."

"Harris…" She was in a state where she knew no hesitation.

"Again…" He panted and wondered how he was going to last.

"Harris…" Her voice grew higher at the last syllable. He increased his pace.

"Again!"

"Harris!" She cried out louder and he almost lost it completely.

"Again!"

She opened her mouth but this time all she could muster was an inaudible scream that got stuck somewhere behind her throat. Her hands reached out for his arms and her nails soon dug into them.

"What?" Harris yelled as he felt her clench around him.

"Harris!" She practically screamed and that was it for him. He came into her while she was still shaking underneath him her legs tightening around his waist. He was practically seeing stars and the only thing that kept him from thinking it was all a dream was the sweet pain he felt in his arms that her hands would not let go of, just like she would never let go of their past.


	3. You'll Never Have My Heart

_And another chapter, had to let out my guilty pleasure a bit more still;) Btw I'm ignoring all the J.R.'s Masterpiece stuff in this, just focusing on A/H:) _

The afternoon sun was burning and seeing the lack of shade around the parking area Harris chose to take off his jacket leaving only the white striped dress shirt on before he stepped out of the sweet air conditioned space. The hot air blew in his face instantly as he set out to look for her in the more secluded areas of the park. After a while he could easily recognize the lone woman sitting neatly on a blanket in the shade of trees, her shoulders covered with a brown shawl.

"So what is it, Annie?" He opened with a completely casual tone in order to faze her.

She jumped a little and quickly turned to look as Harris towered over her. Taking a deep breath in an exaggerated manner she put down her book but remained still staring into distance. Soon enough a hand was extended to her and she eyed it suspiciously, yet undoubtedly recalling all the things it had done to her.

"It's just a hand, Annie, not a firearm." His words were met with an eye roll.

She took his hand and gracefully got up her green sundress flowing right below her knees. When her eyes were pointing downward Harris quickly painted a mental picture of the neckline that was lower than usual. The dress could not be called daring on any scale but knowing Ann a message was definitely being sent there.

"So…" Harris threw a meaningful gaze at her and then back at the tree he was now picking with his fingers. "What's on your mind?"

"Nothing that involves you Harris, I can assure. I…"

"Uhuh." Harris cut her off still fixated on the tree and nodding as if she was making a good point. "And that's why you drove all the way out here to read…Crime and Punishment?" He sneered at seeing the cover of the book that had been laid on the blanket.

Their eyes met and he could see the realization hitting her after being outsmarted quicker than she had anticipated. He went on.

"It's obvious you came all the way here alone knowing that I would find you." He pointed his head towards her waiting for confirmation.

A smug smile slowly crept on Ann's lips as she took a calculating look at him. "Well in the end we both came here, didn't we?" She paused for a bit. "Harris…"

He glanced down at her lips and she unintentionally mimicked the gesture. After realizing what he was doing she swallowed and blinked rapidly a few times while trying to resume her speech.

Harris chuckled silently. "Go on."

"And anyway…" She hesitantly returned his gaze. "This has to stop. _All_ of it."

Harris looked at her blankly as if he had all the time in the world for this conversation.

"All of it. It ends here." Her voice was shaking a little. "Do you understand?"

Harris waited a bit to see if there was more to come but she merely went quiet and looked around to make sure no one was close by.

"Okay." He said simply.

"Okay?" She repeated a bit confused.

He stepped closer. "Okay."

Ann attempted to ask him something but no words came out and he was now right beside her. He took her right hand to kiss it goodbye while his left hand trailed down her back making her twitch in his hands.

"Harris…" She squirmed.

"Annie…" He whispered with a hint of amusement as his hand made its way down to her backside.

"Someone could see…" She begged.

"You should have come to my house then." He mumbled into her ear. His hand was now at the back of her thigh while the tree was covering them. He graved to feel her flesh right under that fabric but unfortunately she had decided to play games and he had no choice but to jump in.

"I'm stopping now, Annie." He whispered through gritted teeth hardly able to contain himself as he grabbed her thigh bringing it into contact with his and watched her face with satisfaction. "Because you clearly can't."

It was pure torture letting go and not getting to see the look on her face but he did it anyway and walked away smiling all the way back to his car. She was so funny and didn't even know it.

….

If looks could kill, Bobby Ewing's eyes would most likely give one a slight burn at best. That was why Harris liked him. Not that he would ever see a reason in befriending him, even in some other universe where that might have been a possibility. He just happened to like harmless people who could never hold any kind of control over him. The harmless man had also succeeded in keeping Ann for twice as long as he had and for that he had to give him some credit. Now here he was staring back at him from the lunch table and it was only a matter of time before his wife, who was facing her back to Harris, would realize his presence. Bobby would tell Ann her ex-husband was there with a female companion and she would not be able to look. His plan was golden.

After making sure Bobby had seen him Harris went back to the mindless conversation with his lunch date, a 30-year-old secretary from the firm whom he could count on dressing provocatively enough to make it appear to be more than just a business lunch. It was not in his nature to be unnecessarily rude with people he barely knew and therefore had no real reason to dislike but he could mostly give her one worded answers while he continued to eye Ann and Bobby's table unnoticed.

It was proving to be difficult to stick to his plan to leave before the Ewings would as Bobby seemed to increase his pace with his lunch from the moment he had become aware of Harris but somehow he made it. After paying he quickly got up, buttoned his jacket and walked his confused date with him until they reached the table that was conveniently on their way. The couple sitting down clearly had hoped he would pass them by without saying a word as they both at once laid their eyes on their plates.

"I was very sorry to hear about your brother, Bobby." Harris opened with just enough empathy in his voice to make it sound sincere to just about anyone but the three of them.

Bobby looked back at him as if he had just heard the most juvenile joke ever.

"Anyway…" Harris straightened his tie and looked over the table. "I hope there will be no more bad blood between us. Maybe one day we could all sit down and...laugh about all our silly little indifferences."

He grinned at Ann and was met with a somewhat hostile gaze while Bobby was at loss for words and looking all the more confused.

"This is Emily by the way." He hastily gestured at his date and then immediately led her out before her anger over all the ways she had been ignored would become apparent.

….

The grey mesh striped dress had his imagination moving. He had seen it once before when he had stopped by the Kristy Stubbs Gallery to hand her a photo of Emma. Never had he expected to see her standing at his doorstep wearing it. All it would take was that one zipper at the back…

She was glancing around as if looking for paparazzi and he promptly stepped aside to let her in still waiting for her to initiate the conversation. Bless her for never daring to use the phone.

"Are you going to tell Bobby?" Ann started immediately after Harris had closed the door. Her eyes were filled with genuine worry.

All the ways he had tried to work her up and she came to that conclusion. It was somewhat unexpected and it took him a moment to see things in this new light.

"Now _why_ would I do that?" He assessed her as he spoke.

"Why do you do anything? For all I know this could be some sick twisted plan of yours to destroy me again." She had started to raise her voice and Harris was slightly taken aback. She got so overly emotional sometimes.

"You give me too much credit, Annie." He spoke perfectly composed but burning on the inside. Did she really think he would go through such extreme measures when he had already got more than he could have ever imagined? And it certainly didn't require that much planning. Yet her mouth fell open at his words.

"I don't…I don't even know what I'm doing here." Her eyes shot around the hallway that held so much history, good and bad, and she looked completely lost.

"Yes you do." He did his best to keep calm. Was she kidding him now?

"If I did then I must have been temporarily insane!" There was pure fury in her eyes as she turned around to leave.

"Look…" He spoke calmly knowing that one word could make her stop in her tracks, which it did. However she didn't turn around.

"We are not kids, Annie." He walked towards her. "You made a choice, and while it may have worked in court you can't claim temporary insanity here."

She shook her head weakly. "You really see no flaws in your actions, do you Harris?"

_In some I do._ He thought to himself as he reached to kiss her neck and as the tenderness of the touch flustered her he used the opportunity to take a firm grip of her arms. Licking his teeth he turned her around and then went for her mouth kissing her roughly. His tongue met hers and he made no attempts to slow down. Still holding her arms in his grasp he pressed her against the wall facing a powerless but quickly intensifying response that reaffirmed him she had not been kissed like that in a long time. And she had thought she could escape passion forever.

His hands moved to her breasts and as he gently but firmly rubbed them her whole body curved slightly in that silent ache for him. One hand moving to Ann's lower back he pressed her against him to make her feel his growing desire and she moaned quietly into his mouth. Oh she would be eating off his hand.

"Now what am I gonna do with you..?" His hands moved slowly up her back and neck until his fingers were forcefully running through her strawberry blond hair. She was staring intensely into his eyes looking for something.

All of a sudden he let go of her completely before quickly grabbing her arm and then started walking her towards the living room area. She struggled at first to keep up with his pace but did her best as he was pulling her. Once by the couch he let go and stepped back a little his eyes lingering on her body.

"Take it off." His voice was stern as he was looking down at her a bit. Oh how he would never get tired of this.

Her hands shakily reached for the zipper while he kept measuring her with his eyes. As the dress fell to the floor he started unbuttoning his shirt. The thought of having her entirely naked in his home while he would remain dressed was one of his fantasies but he figured she wasn't ready for that yet, not with what he had in mind at least. And so he threw the shirt on an armchair and turned back to her.

"Now everything else." He ordered.

She looked a little unsure as she unclasped her bra and kept glancing at him from under her eyelashes. It was truly amazing to Harris how she still had little idea of her seductive skills. With the last remaining item of clothing gone, except for the heels that he stopped her from taking off, Harris motioned at her to sit on the couch. As she did so he rubbed his chin while taking it all in. He then bent down and whispered into her ear.

"Remember when you let me watch?"

When his eyes returned to her face she looked absolutely horrified for a moment before silently accepting her fate. Good God his husband had somehow managed to set her back years sexually. Harris mentally deducted a point from Bobby's account and stood up watching Ann bite her lip as her hand slowly moved to her nether regions. He took off his belt and started to unzip his jeans to encourage her and it seemed to have the desired effect. She closed her eyes and laid her head back as her confidence grew. It took him longer than usual to take off all his clothes as he didn't want to miss a second of the performance. When he was done he stepped closer and Ann's eyes shot open now full of want and desire. And it was all reserved for him.

"Annie…go on." He was going crazy just watching her but it was all too sweet to end just yet. Her eyes watching him as she sank deeper into that practically toxic state, it was more beautiful than he'd remembered. Taking his time he stood there watching and she didn't seem to mind one bit.

He smoothly went down on his knees right before her and took hold of her hands placing them on her sides. Watching her rising chest and slightly gaping mouth he softly slid his right hand to her throat and at the same time used the other hand to spread her legs further apart. She gasped as loudly as she could with his hand still securely holding her in place. He looked at her seriously with a hint of danger in his eyes and tightened his grip forcing her head against the back rest as he went down and pressed his lips against her front. She instinctively pushed her body closer to the edge of the couch but was soon stopped by Harris's grip as he started to build her up. He went on to circle his tongue around her core while his other hand grasped at her inner thigh, nails digging deeper with every moan that escaped her lips. The more her breathing increased the surer Harris became of the fact he wanted far more than he could ever have.

After a while he had to stop and while he was getting up he was once again awestruck by the beauty of her. It took stripping her off everything to truly bring him back to the old days.

"Turn around." He swiftly motioned at her while standing up. Tasting her and hearing all the sounds she made had got him so hard he could barely think straight anymore. She knew he was not to be toyed with and did as told. Admiring the view he ran his hand up her back and upon reaching her neck he closed his eyes and lightly pushed himself against her while stroking her hair. It was almost too good to be true. And it was about to get a whole lot better

He repositioned himself to enter her and groaned after meeting her warmth again. It took a moment to figure out the right ankle and he knew he had found it when his thrust was met with a loud moan. Hearing her gave him endless pleasure and he continued to build up his pace bringing them both closer to the edge.

The room quickly filled from their sounds but it wasn't enough to just hear her pant as he pushed himself inside her again and again.

"What do you say?" His fingers were grasping hold of the back of her head as he slowed down for a moment.

"Harris…" She whimpered clutching to the back rest her knees trembling.

"That's my girl." He grinned victoriously and thrust into her faster until the moment came she couldn't take it anymore.

Having her come in his hands screaming his name was like a drug to him. His hands wandered all over her body taking it all in, pulling her closer and at the same time pushing himself deeper into her warmth. As her body kept shaking she still whispered his name and he could hardly believe it was happening.

She was still gasping for air when he pulled out and grabbed her waist quickly laying her down on the couch. His eyes never leaving her glowing face he held one of her legs up and pushed himself right back in sweat covering his entire body while her fair skin was graced with slight blushing on her cheeks. There really was nothing more beautiful in the world to him. For a moment his mind was taken back to that conversation they had at the park and as he recalled her words he reached down his lips hovering right above hers.

"None of this ends." He paused to glance at the wary but obedient gaze before him. "Do you understand?"

He received a silent nod in response and upon that he kissed her fiercely and increased his pace until his insides flamed and he fell harder on top of her still clutching her leg in his hand.

"God, Annie…" The curve of her neck muffled his scream a bit and at the same time her hands gently wrapped around his neck. He had graved for that kind of affection from her for the longest time and it instantly gave him a new kind of serenity. For a minute he felt closer to her than ever before.

However the moment was broken short when the thought hit him that she might have in some way sensed the depth of his feelings for her. He had gotten too close over just three encounters and it terrified him. Avoiding Ann's gaze he gradually got up to sit beside her and after a few moments turned back to hold out his hand to aid her. She took it but quickly got up, gathered her clothes and left the room while he sat still pondering. He wasn't sure how he could continue but letting go was definitely not an option.


	4. Let the Sky Fall

The Southfork ranch was definitely the home of the Ewing family. To Harris everything about it screamed Bobby and none of it Ann. It had a way of changing people, for the duller. He sighed deeply as he stepped on the doorstep and turned to her daughter.

"Now baby girl, would you be a dear and give your mother and I some privacy, okay?" She looked relieved and immediately turned on her heels as Harris quietly turned the handle. He could always count on Emma to do anything for him, as long as Ann was out of sight.

The house was everything he had expected and nothing about it interested him. After a quick look he figured she would be upstairs and so he quietly took the stairs hoping there would be no unpleasant surprises waiting for him, such as other people. Following the low rattling noise he found himself in what appeared to be Emma's room and saw Ann going through the drawers facing her back to him. She was wearing a red sweater and slim fit jeans that were flattering her in oh so many ways. As he looked around the room and then back at her beautiful figure he felt a weight land on his shoulders and he could not shake it off. She would always be above all this and she would never even realize it. Not wanting to alarm her too much he decided to remain at the doorway for a bit.

"Going through her things already, are we?" His voice made her jump and turn around instantly.

"Harris!"

The look on Ann's face was definitely worth any kind of trouble he might be in.

"How did you get in here?" She hissed her eyes bouncing around wildly as she stood frozen to the spot. Playing with her fears was quite the turn-on, as always.

"Ah…our darling daughter did, to the ranch and all the way to your door." He sneered enjoying the feeling of power. "I'm glad to see you haven't let all my years of hard work go to waste by turning her into a disobedient brat."

Ann narrowed her eyes. "Well she is half me after all."

"Oh she sure is." He winced. It was something he had come to realize over the last few weeks.

"…and half you, as hard as it might be for me to believe." She sighed at the thought.

Harris cocked his head wondering for a moment if that was something Ann spent a great deal of time thinking. As he watched her in silence she quickly became aware of the dangerous situation again.

"I can't believe you had the nerve to come in here." Her voice was full of warning but Harris was already ignoring her and started to fumble the picture frames on the wall.

"You've decided to keep her here for good then?" He said absent-mindedly and from the corner of his eye he could see Ann's frame stiffen a bit.

"She has a free will. I thought we covered that before." The condescending tone in her voice never ceased to amuse him. If only he'd have thought to get her this worked up back when they were married, would the sex have been as spectacular too?

"You do realize Bobby will be here at any moment?" She was clearly desperate to get him out but not brave enough to get any closer. She had learned fast where that would lead.

"Funny because…" He had now moved to the magazines on the table. "…Emma told me he just left." He glanced at her no emotion visible on his face. Ann stood still her lips pursed, either indecisive about her next move or just waiting for the opportunity to make a run for it. With a heavy sigh Harris slammed his hand on the table and turned to her. He looked straight into her eyes as if he had at that moment discovered something.

"Tell me Annie…how's it been like?" He approached her with a slightly malicious smile on his face as he eyed her from head to toe.

Everything about her body language was screaming a silent "no" as he took another step towards her.

"How has it felt…hmm?" His eyes travelled hungrily down her body again.

Shaking her head she took a step back. "You won't do this to me, Harris. Not here." It was almost as if she believed those words as they came out of her.

"Makes no difference where, Annie." He took another step.

"No…" Her voice shuddered making them both more than aware of her inner weakness.

He reached out to stroke the hair on the side of her face and as his fingers made contact with her skin she burst into tears. It was as if he had turned a switch.

_Oh those tears. This might take longer after all. _

"I know you feel guilty. It's in your nature." He spoke softly trying not to upset her further as he reluctantly let go of her face that was now hanging down. Her tears had never affected him because he was always in full control of them. In the past he could make her cry as easily as he could make her stop for she was as good a person as she was weak.

"This is not me…" She shook her head faintly, her voice barely audible. It always infuriated him when she would try to deny her true being but when he was with her his composure was rarely lost. He knew that even with 20 years between them she was still the same, if you scratched the surface you would always find Ann Ryland, the woman who would forever depend on him, on his touch, on his opinion of her. It was apparent from the way she dressed whenever she came to see him to how she would firmly steer clear of his touch decades on, as if deep down she knew he would be able to ignite her insides all over again.

"It's our actions that make us who we are, not what we tell ourselves." He knew she was still in his reach, every fiber of her being wrapped around his finger, but nevertheless he was choosing each word carefully.

She lifted her head still avoiding his gaze and blinking back the tears.

"Look at me Annie." He demanded still softly and she unwillingly did as told. When her watery eyes met his he saw his way right through. His hand returned to her cheek caressing it gently at first but as he leaned closer the movements grew more eager and his fingers made their way to her neck before travelling down her body greedily feeling each exposed part of her warm skin. She had started to shake in his hands, biting her lip and clearly trying to decide which organ she should listen to. He pressed the side of her head against his as his other hand tugged at her belt.

"There is no right or wrong Annie, it's not that simple." He whispered into her ear with so much want it was impossible for her to ignore it and she instinctively curved her body against his. To feel her yearn for closeness gave him all the more satisfaction and he wrapped his arms tightly around her upper body before kissing her fiercely. Not holding anything back he brutally forced his way into her mouth making his desire as obvious as ever. It had clearly been a line that had to be crossed for she responded to his kiss right away. Once she was in there was no turning back.

Harris couldn't believe the passionate response he was getting from her. She was on fire, pulling him closer and playing with his tongue in a way he had not experienced from her before. During their earlier encounters she would not give into his kisses completely even when she was lying under him letting him do whatever he wanted. This time was different and he wasn't quite sure what had caused it, maybe the loneliness she felt from carrying her sinful secret with her every day. However, he knew he had to act fast.

After freeing his hands he moved back to her belt and then swiftly took care of the button on her jeans as her fiery kisses continued to make him feel all too confined in his clothing. Apparently she did not mind one bit that they were still in Emma's room. Groaning Harris forced her against the wall and pulled her jeans down a bit before sliding his hand between her legs. She moaned against his lips wrapping her hands anxiously around his neck as he teased her by only touching the fabric of her underwear.

"Does it feel like this when he does it?" He breathed out brushing her lips with his as his fingers added more pressure but the only sound that came out of her was incoherent mumbling.

The anger that always dominated him had quietly started to burn again and mix with the frustration he felt with her to the point of creating an all new unbearable sensation. He grabbed her by the hair making her face him. "Does it?"

She stared back her lips now pursed, clearly trying to keep a hold of herself.

"Does it?" He repeated the question louder and her lips started to tremble.

"No!" She practically screamed her voice breaking and fell limp back against the wall.

"Good girl." Harris exhaled deeply feeling the weight lift off his shoulders a bit as he pulled her panties aside and started stroking her in a way he knew would build her up fast. Her hands slammed against the wall at the first touch and she closed her eyes as her breathing increased. Even though Harris had known he would have his way with her anywhere it still amazed him how each one of those plans came to life. Using his other hand he took a firm grip on her chin and turned her to face him. She understood his silent message and opened her eyes allowing him to see the effect he had on her. The primitive need that could only be brought out in his hands was written all over her face. Watching her intensely he slid two fingers inside and she blinked rapidly trying her best to hold his gaze. With every move he made she struggled more but always showed him how much she wanted it.

Still holding her chin Harris stroked her faster and she kept panting all the while meeting his eyes. As she tried to concentrate on giving him what he needed while allowing the pleasure to fill her core it caused her body to shake more and more violently against the wall.

She was almost there when they both heard the sound of a car outside.

"Oh no…" She whispered attempting to break his grip but he had anticipated her move and held her tighter in place with no intention of stopping.

"Wha...Harris are you insane?!" She gasped in horror her both hands clutching onto his arm to stop him. Giving into her resistance he loosened his hold but used his other hand to brush his thumb over her lips. As he did so his eyes were focused on hers feeding her need at full force.

Meeting his gaze she failed to make a run for it and Harris seized the moment continuing just where he left off. He was surprised to find that the small pause had only increased her arousal and as his fingers slid inside her staggering feet failed to hold her properly. Whimpering she sought for balance by trying to hold onto his arms and he used his entire body to push her light frame firmly against the wall. Now trapped between the two obstacles she appeared to have given up and buried her head in his neck trying to muffle her moans. He could feel her teeth lightly scrape his skin and for a moment he considered having her on the spot not caring that they would get caught. She was shaking, clearly desperate to make it in time and he retracted his fingers to circle them over her most sensitive spot making her cry out at the unexpected motion.

They both flinched at the sound of the front door opening downstairs.

"Back in…now…" She panted in the most demanding tone he had heard from her so far.

The door closed all too quickly.

"Now!" Her whisper was like a loud cry to Harris's ears and he returned to her dampness working his fingers faster than ever before. She was leaning into him her hands tugging his shirt roughly and her breathing was so loud Harris swore it could be heard from the other side of the ranch. The footsteps downstairs kept getting closer but Harris knew he had won. After a few seconds she let out a high pitched breath and before she could refill her lungs he forced a deep kiss on her mouth making sure no more sounds would come out. It proved to be a good decision as she kept shaking and clutching around his fingers her frame only being held up by the strength of his upper body pressing her against the wall.

He could already hear the footsteps on the stairs and so he pulled his fingers out and ended the kiss silently praying he would manage to calm down before he had to leave. Feeling her heart race against his chest was definitely not helping matters but turning his thoughts to her rapidly approaching husband did the trick. Her green eyes fluttered open inches from his face and as he gazed into them he brought his fingers to his lips and sucked on them while giving her the dirtiest look he could muster. She looked so flushed, completely free of any boundaries and leaving her at that moment was pretty much unbearable. What he wouldn't have given to take full advantage of the situation, to tear off those clothes…Harris forced himself to turn away from the face that would never cease to drive him mad and rushed out of the door the sight of her painted in his mind.

In the upstairs hallway he played around with the thought of having a casual chat with Bobby, making up a story of some sort as he would go along, but realizing the husband had gone to the master bedroom to look for Ann he quickly chose not to. Bobby was bound to go check on his wife before engaging in any conversation with him and that would make the whole thing less enjoyable. And so he went down the stairs and left the house not looking back. Too bad Ann would probably never let him know how she talked her way out of that one.


	5. I Can Still Make Explosions

_I wanted to write from Ann's POV for a change but I'll probably go back to Harris again. Just needed something new to add to this:) Thanks for all the reviews again, they really make my day!_

Ann Ewing had a thing for pain. It wasn't how she had planned to live her life but nevertheless it was always there, consuming her everyday existence. She had tried to escape it once by running into the arms of a man who possessed a heart of gold and would never dare to do her wrong. Being loved and leading a carefree life riding horses and taking care of her family was something she had though would finally release her from the anguish but it was never to be. Carrying that light exterior while the torment weighed her down on the inside only made her life a harrowing paradox and it was slowly killing her. Even after she had found closure with her past mistakes the feeling still wouldn't set her free. She had started to realize it was impossible for her to lead a peaceful existence, she needed something more to feel alive. And in her life there had always been one man who had brought her far more pain than anyone else. When she was at her most vulnerable he would never fail to make an appearance. It was like he knew.

She was painfully aware of all this as she watched the said man leave their daughter's room while she quickly zipped her pants with shaky and most of all sweaty hands. There was no air left in the room and she needed to get out.

As she stepped out Harris had already vanished like a bad dream and she was faced with her husband coming from the opposite direction. It was too much. She refused to deal with it.

"Annie!" There was a mixture of shock and wariness in Bobby's voice.

Ann rushed past him in the hallway without saying a word and made her way to their bedroom and then to the ensuite bathroom. Her heart was pounding out of her chest as she locked the door. How would she ever get out of this one?

"Annie, what happened?" Bobby was right on the other side of the door and clearly worried sick. The sting of guilt in her chest was almost unbearable.

"What did he do?" He tried with a calmer voice.

"Nothing. Bobby, please…I just need to calm down." _Well that part was true_ she thought to herself as she sighed.

There was a small pause and she knew he was gathering strength to ask something she was already dreading.

"Did he touch you?" His voice was filled with fear.

"No!" She yelled all too loudly.

"Bobby, please. Just don't." Ann said firmly, thankful that he couldn't see her face. She knew it would work because if there was one thing they both excelled at it was knowing when to leave the other alone. As her husband disappeared from the other side she breathed out in relief at the little time she had won.

Slowly walking in circles around the bathroom her mind went back to what had just transpired moments earlier. It didn't feel real, none of it. His voice intruding in her once peaceful mind, his body invading her space, his eyes making her imagination run wild, his hands bringing her immense pleasure, his eyes rousing all those filthy thoughts she didn't know she was capable of, making her want more and more, and in her own home…he had made her crazy. If only it had been a dream.

"No..." She whispered and slapped her forehead in a desperate attempt to make the thoughts leave her mind. Her hands were grasping the rim of the sink as she squeezed her eyes shut and used all her willpower but no matter how hard she tried Harris had overpowered her, not only her head but every inch of her feeble body that was left begging for more. If he had intended to lay his claim on her then he had succeeded in a way she never even saw coming.

However, in the back of her mind she had always known that should she give him that window of opportunity he would make her his again whether she wanted or not. He was a very smart man, one you could not play games with. She had tried and succeeded once upon a time but the element of surprise was now gone and there was nothing she could pull on him, no way to get out of this. It was a deadly combination, him enjoying having control over her and her wanting him so badly. He had ignited that need inside her, one that had stirred within her for so many years but never quite fulfilled until now.

Ann hung her head down not even daring to face the woman in the mirror. She was broken beyond repair, every decent quality of her gone. She would only ever hurt people and all for a man for whom she had not had a kind word for over 20 years. He was the one she should have sacrificed in this but it just wasn't possible. It wasn't only the pulsating need that had wiped out the voice of reason from her head, she felt she had to do what he asked of her, as if she owed him. Ann shivered at the thought as it made no sense and at the same time acknowledging it made no difference to how she felt in her gut. She could either continue and risk everything or end it for good leaving herself with that feeling of guilt, something she would get from an unfinished chore. Ann tried to convince herself she could live without the sexual part if she just got his face out of her mind, those eyes of his that bored into her soul wanting her in every possible way. She had never felt wanted like that, not ever been driven to the brink of her sanity like she was now. She had been able to make people happy before but it wasn't like this. Knowing there was more to life than being perfectly content had ruined her. She longed for the craziness, fights, sex, all of it. It was madness and at the same time it blew new life into her soul. Giving up something like that simply felt wrong no matter how she tried to reason it.

Paranoid that Bobby could smell Harris on her she quickly took off all her clothes and threw them in the laundry as she did after every sinful occasion. This time it was different, Harris was everywhere in the house. She felt she was carrying him with her, how could Bobby possibly miss that? She would have to scrub the entire house clean with bleach and it still wouldn't be enough. There was no way she could face her husband with Harris's touch all over her and so she turned on the shower. As she stepped into the steam she felt Harris's presence in the room, as if he was watching her, eating her with his eyes. And then he would come closer, firmly move his hands all over her body as she was washing herself. He would tease her to the breaking point and once she was done showering he would dry her up getting increasingly eager until he was kissing her and walking her to the bed where he would make sure she would never be entirely clean, and he would do it in the most pleasing way. He could be so rough and yet make her feel safer in his arms than anywhere else.

And there it was. She was already craving for more even though he had just released her from that excruciating need that had been building inside her since their last encounter the week before. If he ever wanted to truly make her suffer he would make her wait longer. Ann shook her head at the pathetic reality she could not even try to deny. There had to be a cure for this, there just had to be.

The guilt was just enough for her to make it out of the shower without giving into her desire. She rolled her eyes at the idea. What had become of her? Wearing her bathrobe she went to look for new clothes when her sixth sense suddenly tried to tell her something.

_There is no one in the house._

With growing panic she threw on some underwear, her green sundress and brown flats before rushing downstairs. It was empty. Outside she realized Bobby's car was gone and it dawned on her he must have gone after Harris.

_No no no._ Her worst fears were coming true.

With no second thoughts she rushed back inside to get her purse and then ran to her car. She didn't know what she was going to do but standing and waiting around the house was definitely not an option. As she turned the key in the ignition she could feel her stomach drop. It would take so little for Bobby to realize what was going on and if she was smart she would not go anywhere near Harris in a long time. Nevertheless she pressed the pedal and started driving to a place she had sworn to herself so many times she would never in her life return to.

_This is a bad idea._ Her brain was trying to talk sense into her, to let it all play out instead of meddling and possibly making it worse. If she were to stand in the same room with the two men there was no possible way she could play it cool. It just wasn't in her. How she could ever let herself fall for a man like Harris Ryland when she was so easily dominated? There was no one else to blame but herself and the thought made her want to cry but the dread that was building inside kept her tears at bay.

After carefully watching out for any sign of Bobby's car she arrived at Harris's house and to her surprise found it empty. The unexpected turn of events left her worried. Her mind was working out multiple scenarios, each one scarier than the other and the most dominating one was where Harris had simply grown tired of her constant attempts to push him away and decided to ruin her life once and for all. In a way she hoped he had for it would have placed her guilt on someone else's back for a change. But it was only a momentary wish she came to realize as her heart sank at the thought of losing everything for the man who had made half of her life on earth a living hell.

The sound of an approaching vehicle made Ann turn around in panic and she felt a moment of relief when she saw it was Harris and not her husband. Debating on what to do she remained standing in the driveway as Harris got out of the car and slammed the door shut before walking towards her in a calm manner, the total opposite of how she was feeling on the inside.

Not saying a word he simply shot her an arrogant, slightly joyful glance and stopped a few feet from her, clearly enjoying how nervous the silence made her. She didn't want to voice her concern out loud dreading it would only give him another string to pull, but what choice did she have. How people worked their way out of situations like this she would never know.

"Did Bobby come after you?" She sighed in defeat.

Harris raised his eyebrows and then extended his arms for a hug he must have known he wasn't getting.

"Harris will you just please answer the question?" She tried not to sound too desperate, although she figured it might not work seeing how she had driven all the way to his house to ask a simple question.

Harris shook his head in amusement and then promptly made his way past her to the front door. Ann felt a rush of panic again.

"Harris!"

He turned around still not speaking but his body language was both asking her to talk as well as laughing at her. How quickly she had fallen.

"I'm asking you nicely…" She walked towards him which prompted a victorious gaze in his eyes.

"Well Ann, why would you ask impolitely? It would not do you any favors." He sneered at her and opened the door.

She hated how just a few words from him could make her burn with rage. There was nothing she could say that could hold any leverage over him. And now he gestured her to come in.

"Harris…" She tried to stand her ground.

"Suit yourself, Annie." He winked and stepped inside.

Her limbs took on a life of their own and without even realizing it she was standing in that gloomy hallway once again.

_Memories and regrets…and oh those memories._

His back was moving away from her, the light blue dress shirt, black pants…He always knew how to dress and take care of himself and although time had a way of deflating the effect those qualities once had on her she still appreciated them. The way he valued quality in everything made being with him more special because she knew she had met the standards of this man. It was hard for Ann to digest that was how she really felt deep down but 20 years had been enough for it to sink in.

She was suddenly very conscious of the fact that he still wanted her in some way, even after all this time. It encouraged her to try again and maybe for once get something out of him that didn't involve the things she was trying hard to push as far back in her mind as possible. He sat down on an armchair that she figured must be his favorite spot and she followed in his lead to take the chair right next to him. Harris crossed his legs facing her direction and watched her with an expectant look.

"I can't find him..." She started and instantly felt a lump in her throat as the words came out. The possible consequences of her actions had begun to dawn on her for real.

"He should be back before dark if that's what you're worried about." He snarled at her but as Ann lifted her gaze she could have sworn for a moment there was something awkward in his approach to the matter. But it was gone in the blink of an eye. He looked at her and grinned which in turn made her nervous.

"Just tell me please, did you see him?" She was desperate for any information that might help her find a way out of the mess.

He leaned his head back as if their conversation was the most relaxing thing to ever happen to him.

"I did not."

She sighed a breath of relief at his words.

"But…" He continued. "I know where he's at."

"Where?" She was confused and scared again.

"Oh good old Bobby was first seen here and now I hear he's trying to get into my office." He spoke with lightness in his voice as he looked down.

_Of course._

"So don't you fret, Annie." He stood up, seeming to be in a lighter mood and she quickly followed wanting to meet him at full body length. However, something about him changed at that instant. Her eyes met his and she regretted it right away.

"What's that…?" He placed his hand on her shoulder, gently pulling her towards him. The motion made her heart jump and she knew she had lost her chance when he got closer and for some reason smelled her neck.

"Did you shower?" He sounded amused which only agitated Ann when she remembered the state she was in when she had done so. Everything about her life and her pain seemed to be one big joke to him. He was not worthy of an answer.

"You wanted me off your skin, didn't you?" He cupped her chin firmly and she hated herself for getting turned on by his reaction. Nothing about it was right.

"Why would you do that, huh?" He tightened his grip and gave her an intense stare that made her turn jelly inside and out. Unable to speak she merely swallowed and shot back a look of rebellion. He smirked as if he had hoped for that.

"You know Annie…you haven't kept your end of the bargain." His voice got quieter as he eyed her hungrily and she felt an unexplainable need to satisfy him instantly. No matter how badly she wanted to make him suffer, to torture him the way he did with her, all she could do was to give him whatever he wanted whenever he asked. It wasn't rational but it was what she would do.

"That's quite a dress…" His finger brushed along her chest making its way down to her cleavage and she shifted instinctively which made Harris grin again.

"Oh you still want more, don't you?"

She really wished she could have come up with a comeback of some sort but her mind was as blank as it always was with him. Then a thought hit her and she felt brave enough to speak again.

"You can't come back to Southfork again." She had intended to make it sound more of a command than a plea but her quivering voice suggested the latter.

"And what if I do?" He placed his finger on her lips brushing them softly his eyes focused on the trail he was now making.

"Ummm…" She opened her mouth to speak and he slid his finger in.

"Go on…" He prompted her suggestively and she knew the talking part of the evening was pretty much done.

….

It was such a powerful feeling, to make a man like him moan simply by touching him with her lips. She slowly moved up and down his length, gently sucking and at times grabbing him fully which made him throw his head back every single time. The fact they were only cushioned by the living room carpet made no difference to her. She could have gone on for much longer than he did.

As her tongue worked another one of its tricks Harris groaned loudly and clearly unable to take any more he pulled back. She felt his hands grasp her shoulders and as she was firmly lifted on her knees her eyes were met with a burning gaze that almost terrified her. She felt compelled to say something.

"What do you want?" She whispered.

"I want you out of that dress." There was fury in his eyes in the midst of all that passion and it always made her wonder what it was that made him so angry. The more he was turned on the more it seemed he wanted to beat the living daylights out of her and at times she worried he might actually do it. It wasn't like this back when they had been married, there was something else present in him these days.

She quickly pulled the dress over her head feeling his eyes on her the whole time. It was just like she had fantasized in the bathroom earlier and her addiction for that kind of attention from Harris made her feel ashamed. The feeling would only multiply the following day as she knew well from experience but right at that moment she didn't see any other way than to give him what he wanted. Even if Bobby came knocking on the door she was certain she would still carry on, as had been proven earlier that day. The self-hatred reclaimed her in massive waves as she unhooked her bra under Harris's watchful eyes.

"On your back." He grunted between his teeth as she dropped the item of clothing on the floor.

She lay down and at the same time he got up on his feet starting to unbutton his shirt. Watching from down below she felt so small and the shame crawled from her toes up her body all the while burning her with desire. He watched her as he threw the shirt on the couch and the pants soon followed. Towering over her he took a moment to just watch her lie there and she didn't dare to move an inch. All she could do was wait and feel the pressure grow as if she had been deprived of that gratification for years instead of hours.

He slowly crouched before her and she gulped knowing what was coming next. His hands landed on her inner thighs and spread them apart before his face disappeared from her sight. She knew it wouldn't be long now and as her eyes closed in anticipation she could already feel his lips on that that small garment down below. The sensations moved lower and lower until she couldn't keep quiet anymore. His warm breath on her and all the recollections of what he was capable of, she felt the last bits of sanity leave her body as his teeth scraped over the fabric.

"God…" She put her hand on her mouth biting it until she realized what she was doing and threw it back on the carpet. With every movement he made her hips fought their way up and he pushed them down every single time still slowly torturing her with no intent of removing the piece of clothing that was keeping her from reaching her pleasure to the fullest. His hands were keeping her legs apart and down while his lips worked their way to her inner thighs making her painful craving even worse.

He then got up and straddled her, clearly enjoying the view and she was perfectly aware of the desperation painted all over her face. She was still breathing heavily when he went down and pressed his lips on her nipple. When his tongue brushed over it lightly she felt the pressure grow even more and had no control over the sounds that escaped her lips. Her toes curled at every touch and when he moved to the other nipple her entire body was on fire, silently begging him to end the torture. He then moved up to brush his lips over her neck until he was close to her ear.

"That's how it feels like, Annie." His voice was husky with need and she couldn't help herself. As she whimpered in her helpless state he lifted his upper body with his hands and she sensed his intense stare as his hips grinded against hers adding more pressure to her core.

"Harris…" She gasped, her voice dripping with need.

"Why must you make it so hard for me..?" He grinded against her with more force and she cried out not knowing what to do with herself and not making sense of what he was saying. All she knew was that even after what his hands had successfully done to her earlier that very same day she still needed him badly.

"Harris, please…" There was no shame left in her as the words came out.

"Open your eyes." He ordered angrily and her eyes flung open at that instant. The first thing she saw was the look of satisfaction on his face which at any other time would have enraged her but right at that moment she didn't care.

As their eyes met his other hand started to remove her panties and she assisted him as he could not stop gazing at her. When they were done he finally entered her and she panted at the sensation taking over her body. He was all over her, thrusting into her slowly but surely all the while watching her face and she hoped she could have managed some sort of control over herself but the arousal was too much to take and she cried out louder with each thrust. His right hand moved to her throat as he still kept going on and she closed her eyes again slightly intimidated by the rough moves he was pulling.

"That's…what…you…do…to…me." He panted rage in his voice and all she could do was moan loudly as the build-up got more and more intense. His other hand moved to her nipple and he tweaked it lightly right when he thrust into her again making her wallow in that bittersweet state of not quite reaching her peak. She then felt the same hand run through her hair as the other one pinched her nipple harder and the slower movements were sending her to the edge of frustration. With an even lazier push she felt a harder pinch and cried out in surprise. He let go for a moment and filled her again building up the pace but not quite enough. Her heart was beating out of her chest when she realized Harris was attacking her left side now making her gasp at the sharp pain while her lower region was burning up. Shortly after he tweaked her right nipple even harder and as she screamed, more out of frustration than at the pain, her eyes flew open and she met the darkness in his gaze. The gloominess was soon replaced by satisfaction as he pushed into her harder again and she knew it would not take long for her now. Then his hand moved to her breast again and she flinched knowing he could see her anxiety.

"You never did tell me to stop." He stated in a low voice, the lowest she'd heard from him and it drove her crazy. The only thing that mattered in the world was him inside her and she spread her legs further apart giving him more access. He took advantage of the situation and lifted her left leg on his side digging his nails in her skin and pushing her closer and closer to the edge as she screamed louder each time their bodies connected in the heat. Right when she was almost there he paused again and Ann couldn't help but cry out.

"Harris please!"

He whistled and run his fingers along the leg he was holding, admiring it until he turned his eyes back to her.

"You do learn."

And then the final round started. She felt his weight all over her as his lips landed on her neck and with each thrust he groaned into her hair making her shiver until all she could do was to shake violently as the burning waves took over her body. His left hand stroked her lips as she cried out no control over the sensations that overtook her.

As he panted and waited his hand moved over the left side of her body, feeling it and firmly grabbing her waist pulling it closer even though they were already fully entwined. In the haziness that surrounded her she sighed contently. It felt so good to have someone hold her like that, as if he couldn't get enough.

He was now moving inside her again and she wrapped her arms around his neck wanting him to feel as wanted as she had. Something about that afterglow made her sentimental and the will to please him grew to new heights. She couldn't help it, bringing pleasure to a man like him who possessed both intelligence and more complexities than anyone had time to count was incredibly satisfying. As he made that last push moaning her name into her ear she felt more alive than she had in a long time.

Wanting him was a fatal sickness but having him was vital. She was at a dead end.


	6. May You Never Drive Away

"Annie." The name would forever hover on his lips.

No time in the world would ever be enough.

_Annie._

He had her once and he wanted her again, for the memories were far too vivid to ever let go. The slender body he still knew like the back of his hand, the long legs that caught the attention of many, yet only he was allowed to run his hands over them in the heat of passion. He could have searched all the world and never come across a pair that would compare to hers. She would wrap them around him and gently hold him captive all the while letting him guide her every motion. He was certain no other man would ever appreciate her enough for there was no one else who could see her the way he did.

In some aspects she may have been weak but there was a power in her that was able to light up his darkest moments, to bring him back from hopelessness. All it took was one look into those eyes of hers that would sparkle for all eternity. It terrified him that one day another man could gaze into them and see what he always had. Therefore he was forced to extinguish that light the moment he realized she was about to leave and once he put it out it never quite returned until he had allowed it to.

It had taken some time but lying in his arms right now Ann was virtually the same as she had been in those brighter days. That fire inside her was at its most palpable when she was on the edge, be it anger or pleasure, which was why he needed to make her furious just to bring back the flames in her eyes. When he tortured her body to the point where she was begging him to finish her the energy radiated from her voice. At those moments she was alive again and only for him. It was essential to make it last for as long as possible because once they were done her mind would go back to things he would rather not think about. Ann was living two lives and neither one could not have been completely fulfilling but he would never make her choose. To Harris the ending was clear and each time she left him the crushing truth slapped him hard across the face.

He inhaled that strawberry scent from her hair one last time before her hands let go of his neck and he rolled over expecting Ann to make her quick escape once again. However she remained on the spot and so he turned his head back to her wondering what was going through her mind. Her body language came across as much more relaxed than usual.

"What a day." She stated as her eyes were fixed on the ceiling.

Harris uttered a laughter and turned to look up as well. It was a moment of total serenity and he couldn't for the life of him remember the last time he had felt so completely at peace. She was lying beside him, perfectly still even though there was nothing holding her back. He glanced at her again and noticed she had laid her hands on her stomach and her fingers were fidgeting as if she was trying to figure out a way to express her thoughts. For once Harris was in the dark but it didn't bother him the way it normally would. He sensed something pleasant about her train of thought and thought he might as well seize the moment and go all in because when it came to Ann he had nothing left to lose.

"Why are you here?" He posed the question turning his face back to the ceiling.

As Harris had anticipated he was faced with a thick silence and could almost hear Ann swallow the "I don't know" that must have instantly formed on her lips. The question was left hanging in the air, growing in magnitude to the point where the answer was clear but Harris was determined to make the situation as brooding for her as possible.

The silence went on and he had to look again to check if she was still breathing. As soon as he did so the words came out.

"I love Bobby." She swallowed on the brink of tears and Harris felt his stomach drop. He knew that's where her mind always wandered off to afterwards but he had allowed himself to think this time it was different. He tried to keep the anger out of his voice but couldn't help but snarl.

"Tell me something I don't know, Ann."

They both fell silent for a moment and the atmosphere reached a truly unpleasant peak. Her mouth was moving, possibly gulping for air, and it took a while for the voice to resurface.

"It's all wrong." She suddenly sounded terrified.

Harris rolled his eyes as his fingers dug into the carpet. Oh how he wanted to tear the whole thing apart.

"I don't…I…" Her voice was breaking.

"What?!" He couldn't keep it together any longer and she flinched at his yell.

"I shouldn't feel this way!" She cried out and broke down.

Harris slowly turned his head again to find out Ann had done the same and when their eyes met she jumped on her feet. She quickly gathered all her clothes before leaving the room and by the sound of footsteps she soon appeared to be going upstairs while Harris was left to wonder how he would play things now. She was at a breaking point and maybe for the first time actually thinking about what she truly wanted out of life. It could end either way but he would damn well assist her in making that decision. With those thoughts he then also collected his clothes and went to the downstairs bathroom but listened carefully to make sure she wasn't leaving just yet.

When he came out Ann was still nowhere near in sight and he decided to give her some space so that she wouldn't feel trapped and try to run off. There were clearly some conflicting emotions running through her head and those were the times when she was most easily influenced. For a while now Harris had been sure that Ann must have been in a very dark place when she met Bobby and that their marriage was based on their mutual fear of being alone. Ann never could handle loneliness very well. She was one of those people who needed the acceptance of others and daily assurance of their love in order to feel content. In the past 20 years he had forgotten what it was like to feel that kind of need and it drove him crazy knowing he now shared a common weakness with her, one she was bound to find out about eventually should he keep this up.

He had tried to fight it and convince himself he could go on with their little moments, a week or two apart, but the fact remained he had to have her back. It was hard for him to even grasp the idea that it was now a real possibility but something about the way she had been acting that day kept encouraging him to take stronger actions. It was now or never.

He kept pacing around the room waiting and it was slowly driving him crazy. That was when he remembered he had left his phone in the hallway and the thought was a welcome distraction. As he went to grab it he noticed a missed call from Cliff Barnes. His eyes scanned the stairs and then the phone. There was probably still time he thought as he pressed call.

"Harris!" He tried his best to not be irritated by the sharp and all too loud answer from Cliff.

"What is it?" Harris was suddenly reluctant to start whatever conversation they were about to have. He already had too much on his mind.

"You heard about Bobby?" His voice was both excited and serious at the same time. The topic however put Harris right to the edge.

"Heard what?"

"He's dead, went in a massive car crash just now." Cliff seemed even more excited now that he was the first person sharing this piece of news with him. Harris felt numb and the voice at the other end drifted off to somewhere. He was barely aware of it.

"What?" It was all he managed to say.

"You heard right. Everyone is talking about it! Now I think we should meet tomorrow at…"

At that moment he could hear a door open upstairs.

"I will have to call you back." Harris cut him off and ended the call. What had just happened?

He quickly put the phone down and stood his back facing the stairs. Holding his hands on his hips he tried to shake off any traces of what he had just heard that might still be visible on his face.

"Harris?" Her voice held a hint of uncertainty as she called him halfway down the stairs. The seconds went on but he remained still.

Her bare feet made no sound but Harris could feel her getting closer. He drew a deep breath trying to constrain his frantic heartbeat.

As he turned around a suffocating feeling overcame him. She was now right before him, that ageless face with all the tiny details he had never been able to forget and despite her earlier panic those eyes were still shining in a way only he could see. What she would soon learn would kill it once again and who knew when she would ever recover. He had got used to seeing her come to life at the sight of him and now it would all be over, she would be forever changed. Could she read his mind now that he had not managed to fully maintain his calm?

Lucky for him she would speak first.

"I'm sorry Harris. I…I say some things and I just don't know…" She looked down biting her lip. Harris figured she must have been practicing this monologue hard in front of the mirror while she tried to dry her tears with little success. He found the effort rather pathetic.

"Save it Ann." He unintentionally raised his voice making her noticeably uneasy. Everything about the situation was getting to him but his brain was slowly recovering and trying to assist him in keeping Ann calm. He relaxed his arms on the sides and continued with a softer tone.

"I know why you're here anyway."

She swallowed gazing into his eyes and he took pleasure in the fact she never tried to argue these days. There was something ever so intimate about those glances they gave to each other and no one could ever take them away. She could run away all she wanted but Ann Ewing would forever be his. It just was the way it would be.

"Anyway…" It was her cue for leaving as Harris well knew and he had to stop her, even if it would cost him some of his hold on her. He had to keep her for a while longer, to preserve what he had kindled inside her. It wouldn't be wrong to delay what would soon befall on her and quite possibly cause a part of her to die for good. Bobby may not have been enough for her but she sure carried him with her everywhere she went and that was something he would never try to fight. His eyes lingered on her and he knew he would only speak the truth.

"You do look beautiful in that dress."

She was lost for words as he closed the gap between them and wrapped his arms around her waist. Letting his hands slide up her back he kissed her for as long as he could because he knew the moment he stopped she might say whatever was on her mind and there was a chance it might not please him. There was just no way he could let her walk out yet, even after the forbidden activities they had engaged in only moments earlier.

Eventually he had to stop and so he proceeded to work on her neck aware of the effect it always had on her.

"Harris, I have to go…" She was short of breath but there was still a tiny hint of determination in her voice.

He knew she would stay.

"Do you want to go?" He mumbled between kisses, gaining no answer on her end.

Seconds went by as he kept brushing her neck with his lips making sure his beard scraped it a little. It always provided nice results and he could sense the shiver in her breath each time. It wasn't long before his heartbeat increased too and his left hand moved to her breast taking an ever tightening hold of it as his arousal grew.

"Are you sure you're up for it?" She finally managed to breathe out.

_Oh she is playing dirty._ He had no idea but hesitating was not an option right now.

"You're gonna wish you hadn't asked, Annie." He whispered into her ear earning a much welcome response as her knees buckled slightly. He used the opportunity to grab her waist again and pull her closer before laying his lips on hers. She was as soft and sweet as always, a never-ending source of pleasure that he could embrace with every fiber of his being. It was like she melted into him in a perfectly natural way and letting go just seemed plain wrong, violent even.

When the kiss ended he was forced to meet her gaze again and there was such beauty in her eyes that the magnitude of what would soon happen to them hit him harder than before. For a moment he almost wished Bobby would still be alive and she could go home to him instead of facing the cold truth.

_Almost._

"Come on." He held out his hand and in return she flashed a little smile that took his breath away, not that she would ever be able to tell. Ann then took his hand and they both headed upstairs to his bedroom.

….

"Can you be tender with me, Harris?"

Her voice trembled when his hands wandered under the dress and found her waist, his eyes absorbing every detail of her body. Normally a question like that would have provoked a smile from him but he was too engrossed in what he was doing. The way his mouth dried up whenever he laid his hands on her and felt the pulse underneath his palms, it never ceased to amaze him how alive they both became in each other's presence. She vibrated the kind of energy he would not gain from anywhere else, filling him with excruciating pressure only to release it in the most glorious way. The thoughts alone were enough to build him up painfully high and he had to restrain himself so that he wouldn't pull another round as rough as the previous one. It had clearly taken a toll on her.

"Depends." It was all he could muster in his current state but she appeared to have already stopped caring as her hips rose to meet his touch. He shook his head as he stroked her stomach enjoying the feel of her bare skin but at the same time not quite believing she was in his bed again. It was too right and it could only last for so long. Ann however seemed completely carefree as she kept welcoming his hands under her dress again and again. After that night not a day would go by that he would see his bed and not think of her squirming in his hands.

Her panties were soon coming off as his thumbs made their way under the lace waistband and slowly pulled them down. To feel the silky skin of her thighs underneath his palms made his breathing erratic and there was no question if he was able to give her one last round, if there ever had been.

From there on and for a long time he would remember every tiny detail. They would come to him in flashes when he least expected and each and every one of those dreamlike memories would beat him closer to the ground until the day she would let him come alive again.

She pulled the dress over her head still in horizontal position giving him full view of the perfection she had been graced with. The sight would continue to flash before his eyes every time he was enjoying a glass of cognac on a hot summer afternoon. He would remember how her warm skin felt when he kissed his way down, how it got warmer with each touch until he reached the warmest spot and how she made sounds that were music to his ears.

He would lose focus at every business meeting at least once when he recalled how he took small breaks to watch her face all the while spreading and stroking her marvelous legs, the way her head went spinning was just divine. Her begging would echo in his ears at those abrupt moments and that's when he was forced excuse himself for a short while to go out for fresh air.

Sometimes he would lie awake at night and remember how it felt when her fingers dug into his skull and the moment he recollected how she had screamed his name any hope for sleep that particular night was as good as gone. How ironic that everything he had once fantasized about would turn out to be his greatest downfall and make him feel trapped in his skin.

….

She was really leaving now and he didn't try to stop her. There was a longing in her eyes that he almost allowed himself to believe was saved for him but it might as well have been for her entire life that was in a confused state and so he resisted the urge to kiss her. It was time to take a step back and let everything unfold on its own.

The longing had turned into anger as she turned her back to him and stepped outside. Harris remained by the window watching her car, knowing that at any moment she would find her phone and notice all the missed calls. He wasn't sure if he wanted her to find out right there in his driveway or make it home first. In fact he wasn't sure about anything anymore apart from the fact he needed her light in his life and it was the one thing he would most certainly lose.

Minutes went by but the car didn't move.

_She knows._

Harris sighed and grudgingly turned around. Maybe it would be for the best if he was with her at a moment like that, although deep down his annoying inner voice told him Ann would probably prefer the company of her own family or Sue Ellen or pretty much anyone in her immediate circle of friends as opposed to him.

He walked to the car with his well-rehearsed relaxed demeanor but with each step his breathing grew heavier. Seeing Ann sitting there with no expression on her beautiful face didn't make things any easier. He tapped the window and she barely reacted to him. Instead she weakly pushed the door open never actually turning her head to his direction.

"What is it?" He had thought about several different emotions he could have spoken to her with but in the end resorted to using none.

"Something happened to Bobby." She said matter-of-factly as she stared at the driveway before her.

Harris felt that weight on himself again. It happened every time the man's name was mentioned and on this occasion it was worse than ever.

"What happened?" He asked her calmly.

"He crashed. And now he's gone." Her eyes were blank and her entire appearance was perfectly calm apart from her hands that were shaking as they clutched the wheel.

Harris sighed heavily and then crouched down a bit to meet her at eye level.

"Come out." He was at an alien territory now and knew that every move he made could easily make everything fall apart.

"I can't." She replied her expression unchanged.

"Annie, look at me." He tried softly. Her shoulders relaxed a bit at hearing his voice and she turned her head towards him. The light in her eyes had dimmed but there was still something of her left in them. She would come back, she had to.

"Come out." He figured coaxing her a bit longer was bound to help eventually.

Her head fell but slowly she let go of the wheel and extended her legs out of the vehicle. Harris took her hand and aided her as she staggered on her feet. She looked past him, not at anything in particular.

"I'm sorry Annie." Harris laid his hand on her shoulder and right at that moment a chill wind blew past them making her skin break out in goose bumps all over. It all appeared to go unnoticed by her but seeing her standing there in her sundress looking so fragile made him feel cold inside. The freezing sensation pushed through his veins and it wasn't until he pulled her weakened frame against his chest that he managed to regain some of the warmth she had brought him earlier. She did not give into the hug nor did she fight back but regardless Harris held her close and knew it would take an army to tear her from his arms.

_Or maybe just her._

"I have to go there." Ann pulled away.

"Go where?"

"That place where…" She gulped.

"I'll come with you." He didn't like where this was going.

"No Harris. I have quite a few things to do now, so if you may excuse me." She gave him a weak smile, one that could only be seen on her lips.

His unease grew with each moment his grasp on her lost its hold a little bit more. She had already turned away.

"Ann…" The words got stuck in his throat the way they always did when he wasn't sure if the situation called for begging. If results couldn't be guaranteed he would never do it, not even for her. All he could do was watch her get back into the car and drive away, off to be surrounded with thoughts about her late husband. It had gone down the exact way he had feared.

No, he would not beg her to come back. There had to be another way.


	7. I'll Meet You On Life's Other Side

_Author's note:_ _First of all I'd like to give out special thanks to marysunshine81, Angel Heart Princess and MrsBates93 for always reviewing, you just make my day! I'm really happy there are A/H fans out there who are enjoying this:) Can't thank you enough! I never thought I'd go this route with this story but here we are lol. I do love writing it:D_

A week had passed, 7 days of blinding darkness that hang around him. It was like a robe around his neck and all he could do was to wait without making one single move. But eventually the daylight crept in for Harris knew Ann would leave her house on this particular day. She did not have a choice and he would exploit the opportunity to the very last detail. It was vital to keep his foot in the door, even at times like these when he could be certain she didn't want to talk to him, especially in this setting.

He confidently entered the Dallas Petroleum Club and tried to make his way through the crowds of people with as little attention as possible. It was a whole lot easier without Bobby there. Everyone was so focused on their own pain they barely looked around for acquaintances. It had happened all too soon again and the atmosphere could not have been gloomier.

After a bit of searching his eyes landed on the familiar shape that stood alone in the dining room. She was dressed in black and that was all, there was not a single piece of jewelry on her. It must have been the guilt, she was trying to mourn harder.

As he got closer he spotted the wedding ring that shone all too brightly from her left hand she was hanging by her side, twitching it as if the ring had suddenly given her an allergic reaction. How long would it take until she took it off for good?

He got as close as possible leaving the doors open. It didn't take long for her to notice him and it went as he had expected. Her eyes widened at first and then she sighed just loud enough for him to hear before finally taking the sarcastic route.

"I can't even imagine what you're doing here." She rolled her eyes before turning back to the glass of scotch she was holding in her hand with no intention of actually drinking it.

Harris stepped into the room to stand next to her by the wall, leaving a few feet between them.

"Just wanted to see how you were holding up, Annie." It was a genuine thought and it felt rather strange coming out at the tip of his tongue. The feeling was clearly mutual.

"Oh please, my guess is you're only here to check if Bobby is really..." Her voice quieted as she couldn't bring herself to finish what she had so lightly started.

"That doesn't make sense and you know it." It was Harris's turn to roll his eyes as he focused on the nicely detailed ceiling.

"Look Harris, whatever mind games you are here to play with me, please know that I'm too tired today. Could you just respect that?" She had turned to him but he made no attempt to meet her eyes.

"It's not a game, Annie."

"Oh please, when are you ever _not_ playing?" Ann's focus went back to her drink while her left hand softly tapped the wall behind her.

Harris closed his eyes for a moment before quickly throwing a glance at the woman who was as beautiful as she was infuriating. All those words were forcing their way out but he swallowed them back at the last minute. Being in that almost enclosed space with her brought back so many pleasant thoughts, most of them not to be said out loud in such a situation, but nevertheless it was a hell of a lot better than nothing. And that nothing would one day turn into everything. All it would take was for her to choose life over death.

It was as if she had read his mind when their eyes met again and upon meeting her gaze Harris wondered if there was a small part of her in there asking him for just a bit more assurance. Sadly the moment passed all too soon.

"Well ain't this a surprise!" Sue Ellen stormed in making Ann jump and nearly splash her drink while Harris barely blinked.

The old friends stood facing each other as she continued without taking a breath.

"You two…what you did…" Her voice was already breaking and she couldn't make it to the end of the sentence.

"What are you talking about?" Ann gasped.

"Oh don't you even try, you know what I'm talking about." Sue Ellen was pointing a finger at each of them in turn.

"No, I don't!" Ann was quickly losing her cool, or more likely the shreds of it. It was fascinating for Harris to see how after all that time she had finally turned into a nervous wreck who would become jumpy at the first accusation instead of desperately trying to keep herself together. Not that she had ever succeeded with him. Harris was more than willing to let Sue Ellen have a go at her as it was such a funny thing to watch and he definitely needed something to lighten his mood.

"You do. And Bobby did too." Sue Ellen smiled slyly and crossed her arms.

"Is this you talking or have you been…" Ann shot back with growing panic. She must have known where this was going for she would not normally sink that low.

"This should not come as a shock to you Ann but I am not the only sinner in our family." Her voice was bitter, rid of all its usual warmth.

"And the worst part is, he was willing to forgive you." She went on as the room fell otherwise silent. "After each and every time he hoped it would stop but no, you betrayed him again and again."

Her eyes glistened as she watched Ann's face turn white. "And I had to stand there and watch. To pretend nothing was wrong!"

Ann remained still and in total shock. All she could do was to stand there and take every hit.

"Do you realize what you did to us? Do you?"

"Sue Ellen, please…" She begged but her voice faded out after seeing the unspoken grief in her friend's eyes.

"It just…" She shook her head at both Ann and Harris. "It can't have been worth it."

At that Harris couldn't help but smirk hoping with his head down and turned to Ann's direction it would go unnoticed but Sue Ellen picked up on it. The expression on her face turned instantly from sadness to something between horror and disgust.

"Well now I wish I hadn't said that." She threw her head back as if fighting the sick feeling the two of them were giving her. Ann's eyes were focused on the floor and Harris was just calmly waiting for the unnecessary awkwardness to pass.

"I just don't understand Ann, I really don't." After giving her a pitiful glance she then turned on her heels, clearly unable to face the two of them one minute longer.

They were left standing in the empty room and evidently Ann couldn't bring herself to leave and face the others for fear of what they might have heard. She always was so aware of what others thought of her, the greatness of her sins was enough to destroy her even without adding the condemnation of outsiders to the mix. Harris had always known this and as much as he wished they could have avoided all the drama that ended their marriage he did take great joy in basking in the glory of Ann's debacles. After all she had humiliated him too much, and for what? Only to run back to him the first chance she got. However, having her lose Bobby was something he had never considered and even now a week later he had failed to come to terms with how he felt about the whole thing. It bothered him greatly that he couldn't come up with a clear plan.

"Maybe you should have a chat with your friend Sue Ellen." Harris was biting his tongue to stop the troublesome smirk from reappearing.

Ann looked at him her eyebrows raised.

"What do you mean?" Her innocent confusion only edged him on and he watched her deep in thought as he carefully planned his next move.

"She doesn't seem to understand your…" His eyes wandered down Ann's dress prompting her to take a step back.

"What the hell is wrong with you? This is my husband's memorial." She hissed through clenched teeth and for once appeared to mean every word. This however didn't slow him down.

"Now that she knows what you are like you might as well tell her everything, how you came to me…over and over again." With those last words his eyes had reached hers again and in them he found the usual shock at hearing the truth being spoken out loud but there was also coldness there. It had been deep rooted in the past few days they had spent apart and he could not break through.

"That's what you want? For me to tell about my misdemeanors to everyone I know?" Her left hand twitched again and he took note of it.

"It would only be right. Because Sue Ellen seems to be under the impression that this wasn't something you should enjoy." His eyes were now feasting on her entire body and even though he had made no attempts to actually touch her she still took another step back, as if tearing herself free from him.

"I don't care who lives or dies, Ann, life is all about taking what you want." It was how he had lived and in his gut he knew she wanted to be that way too. Wallowing in what others thought of her had always been her greatest downfall.

Ann's eyes gave out a mixture of feelings, anger being the most dominant one.

"Is there nothing human left in you, Harris?" Her denial shone through from every word.

_Maybe she wanted to believe there wasn't, then it wouldn't be real._

"Oh get off your high horse Annie, we were in it together. So stop acting like you didn't want it." The burning sensation within him had made him raise his voice and it made her edgy in turn.

"Well you certainly fucked me up for good. So let that be your prize, I stand here before you and I _admit_ that it happened. That will be all." There was something ever so amusing in the civilized manner she said those words.

"No need for such language, Annie." He couldn't help the patronizing tone. It came to him as naturally as breathing.

"I am not your Annie!"

"Oh but you are."

"Get out! GET. OUT." Clearly she had stopped caring that people might hear them or draw their own conclusions about the conversation.

"In a moment." He reached out to stroke her cheek one last time for he had trouble letting her go without making any physical contact. It was so close to him, that body of hers right underneath the thin fabric, one zipper at the back separating them from what could easily bring peace to them both. Every moment they spent talking about pointless matters instead of giving into temptation simply seemed like a waste of time. However, this time she seemed to feel very differently.

"Don't touch me!" She flinched as she looked around quickly and then lowered her voice to a whisper.

"Don't you _ever_ touch me again." Her eyes flamed in a way he had rarely seen. In fact the last time he recollected was when she had been holding a gun.

Actually that wasn't a bad thing at all.


	8. You've Got Nothing On Me

She had left him with no choice, of that much Harris was sure. How long could one manage to stay locked in their house? Two weeks without seeing her were just about as much as he could take. It was time to act, however dangerous it might prove out to be.

Out in the dark he watched as the tense shape of her approached him like a wild animal defending its territory, a wild animal that was wearing a rather revealing nightgown that ended right above her knees and the robe she had hastily thrown over it was not enough to keep his thoughts clean. The shotgun in her hands shone brightly in the moonlight and that was the part that made him very nervous. One bullet in his chest had been enough, taking a risk like that again would be foolish. But then again in his mind it wasn't really the risk that made his stomach drop at the sight of a gun as much as the memory of it all. Ann may have been crazier than she had ever been in her life but he knew she wouldn't shoot him again. The woman was only trying to make a point in the only way she knew how. It was an act you had to see through.

"What are you doing Annie?" He started calmly, doing his best not to agitate her. However, one look into her eyes told him it was a mission doomed to fail at that moment.

"I could say the same thing to you! How dare you step onto this property and in the dead of night?" There was no hesitation in her hand movements as she aimed at him.

"I just wanted to make sure you were okay." He continued perfectly composed and slowly spread his arms trying to make a point of what an exaggeration having a gun was in that situation.

"Okay?! What do you think I am, an idiot Harris? I know that's not what you're here for!" The fury in her eyes actually scared him a little bit but he knew he had to remain calm.

"Put down the gun Annie, you don't need it."

"The hell I don't!"

"Not with me." He assured, and for a second he could see the realization in her eyes. She must have known he would never do the same to her.

The moment passed and the anger in her rose again.

"You're the scum of the earth, Harris. I should have kicked you when you were down, the way you did with me!"

"It's not in you Annie, hence the gun." He gestured at her hands.

"Is what not in me?" The wrath had clearly clouded her thoughts as she concentrated hard on keeping her aim at him.

"You think you're so brave holding your guns but you are really only compensating for your weaknesses. If your mind was strong enough you could face me empty handed."

"Oh don't think I don't know what you're doing. You and your little games." She sneered at him.

"Truth hurts, Annie." He sneered in return.

"Get the hell off my yard, Harris!" She really did look a little crazy to him and he figured it was best to walk away, although turning his back to the gun made his heart race in a way that was not at all pleasant.

With every step he took it pained him more that he hadn't got the last word. With his brain it was just inexcusable. He would throw something at her as he walked away.

"The longer you fight the more it will hurt!"

There was a moment of silence and he wondered if she had already wandered out of his reach.

"I think you may have underestimated me, Harris." She yelled at his back, closer than he had expected. She had not moved at all.

_She wouldn't…_

"I left you once, and I can do it again!" She confidently went on.

He stopped and turned around.

"No you won't, Ann."

"Don't think _for a second_ I won't." There was such determination in her voice it made him more nervous than he had been in a long time. He couldn't leave it there. It might mean letting her go for good.

"Oh Annie, now you've done it…"

He walked fast towards her and to his delight saw her certainty quickly vanish into thin air. Her hands were shaking as she pointed the shotgun towards him again.

"Not another step, Harris!"

He ignored her, not even knowing why. His mind was fuzzy with rage as he firmly walked to her and grabbed the barrel quickly pulling it down. The move took her by surprise and she cried out in pain as her fingers failed to follow his motions. Harris took hold of her arm and removed the gun from her hand before throwing it onto the grass. He then grabbed her by the arms his eyes burning into hers. He was about to explode and needed something to take the rage out on. Seeing the momentary surrender written all over her face was just the sweetest thing.

A smile crept on his lips and his eyes travelled down to her lips making his next move obvious but seeing the genuine reluctance on her end he chose not to kiss her. It wasn't an easy decision but he made it in a fraction of a second and she would never even know how his mind worked at that moment.

"Don't try to play games with me Annie. After all this is over I can do whatever the hell I want with you."

She did not even flinch.

"If you're so certain then why are you so afraid?" Nothing in her expression changed as she challenged him and it took him by complete surprise.

_What does she know?_

He was too stunned to speak but it would still play to his advantage for silence made the average person nervous whereas Harris only drank from it.

"Afraid, huh?" He considered aloud after the pause. His hands had tightened their grip and he could see how she struggled to keep her poker face. Yet she wouldn't stop.

"Yes, you are afraid, Harris. Underneath all your _sick_ sadistic actions there's just a scared little man who can't let go of the only woman who would ever marry him."

"Don't flatter yourself, Annie. You don't know the half of it." Her words had stung him more than a little.

"Then prove me how not afraid you really are. You may start by leaving me alone."

"Now I can't do that, you should know by now." He smiled because it was the truth, but also because he could tell she wasn't so sure of her own theory.

"Why the hell not?" She raised her voice and then winced as her sudden movement made him tighten his grip again.

"Because I'm not done with you yet." He breathed out and then loosened his hold on her.

"And may I ask when will you be done with me?" Her voice shivered now despite all her weak attempts to act tough and as a result her gaze drifted to another direction. Clearly she was out of ammo.

"No, you may not." He glanced at her from head to toe, his eyes lingering slightly longer at the cleavage.

_Such a seductive attire to wear in one's house alone._

She noticed his stare and nervously looked away again. Harris took a moment to appreciate the scent that floated in the air around her, a mixture of whatever products she was using and the cool summer breeze. The combination was just too tempting for him. He took the ends of the sash that hang down and tied her robe while watching her intensely. She would not meet his gaze but he noticed how she swallowed hard as his hands hovered at her waist and that was all the encouragement he needed for now.

"It's cold out here." He mumbled as he let go of the neatly tied robe.

"It is?" She looked at him surprised and then flushed at what she had let out. It made Harris chuckle.

"It is. Just not where we're standing." He smiled warmly and there might have been a smile tugging at her lips. He just wasn't entirely sure.

"Goodnight Harris." She looked confident now, clearly impressed with how well she had stood her ground.

"One day Annie." He brushed at her shoulder and she instinctively bit her lip. Her reactions were ever so entertaining and it was such torture to walk away again. But that was what he did and she remained standing in the same spot.

"Don't forget your gun Annie, all kinds of intruders around here." He reminded her over his shoulder.

"Well none of them compare to you!" She shot back rather unprepared.

"Oh Annie, you've made that perfectly clear already." He turned away before he could see the look on her face. It was priceless without a doubt.


	9. I Was There All Along

There was a thought that would not leave Ann alone, and it involved him. Ever since that night he had showed up at Southfork it had started again and she didn't like it. She hated him for making her feel and act in the most inappropriate way in every single situation. Why couldn't he at least let her grieve her late husband and wallow in self-pity for as long as she wanted, the way normal people did? It made her so angry, mostly because her hate for Harris would always fall below the hatred she had for herself. Even after being given every possible opportunity to put her life back on track she still couldn't stop herself from doing things she always abhorred afterwards. And now she was paying the price, of that she was sure. And who knew if her next sin would cause her even more grief. It was why she was reluctant to live anymore, stepping outside the house had been a dangerous game for a while now. Up until the tragedy hit she could never be sure if a simple shopping trip would end with her legs wrapped around Harris while he moaned the most horrid and truthful things to her ear. The thought made Ann shudder. She had changed into someone she didn't recognize nor understand but nevertheless she knew it had happened and with every passing day she hated him so much more for it.

All she wanted was a sign, a tiny bit of proof that there was still some decency left in her. Or maybe it was the sick feeling in her stomach every time she thought of him at night as she lay on the couch she had once sat happily together with Bobby. She couldn't go back to their bedroom anymore and had only appointed Christopher to get her things from there, a task he didn't question for one second. It certainly was lovely being around people who still thought the best of her even if the guilt climbed up her spine more often than she would have liked. So far Sue Ellen seemed to be the only person who was aware of everything that had gone on. The others simply didn't see it or preferred to be blind to the facts. It gave her some small comfort knowing there was at least one person in the world, besides him, to see her for who she really was. For some weird reason it made her feel slightly less dead at times, but dead was what she was now.

It had been a week since Harris's visit and her world had never looked darker. Sue Ellen would still not take her calls and even though Ann knew she would cave sooner or later it still killed her knowing they would never get this time back when they could have gone through the pain together. There was so much guilt weighing her down the easiest solution had been to spend her nights crying in front of the TV, not really noticing if it was even on. She barely ate as depriving herself from food seemed like a fitting punishment for all the horrible things she had done and as her stomach crumbled she felt some relief over having successfully beaten herself for the wrongdoings. Eventually she would make up for everything she had done and only then could she go to bed with lightness in her heart.

Christopher had tried his best to keep her company but spreading her own pain over to her son didn't feel right for it would only take her further away from the atonement that was now almost flickering in the distance. And so she kept sending him away assuring that Sue Ellen was all the company she needed. Emma was out of the house more often than she was in and Ann had grown too tired to even think about what her daughter was doing. She cared too much and caring was simply too exhausting these days. Now all the lies and the lack of even the most basic human contact caught up with her, making her hunch over in physical pain as she sat by the TV.

There were still pictures of Bobby around the house, she had gotten so used to them that most of the time she barely paid any attention to the frames but that particular night it all came crashing down. They were watching her, his eyes cursing her for throwing their life away and running back to the man he had fought so long to save her from.

_How did he even know?_

She would never get a chance to say goodbye. Never get a chance to explain herself.

_Well that was probably for the best._

And if it hadn't been for her, maybe he would still…

"I'm sorry." She whispered at one of the frames in the half lit room. Tears filled her eyes and she knew once it started there would be no end in sight.

His picture stared back at her, the words having had no effect on him. They never would.

"I'm sorry." She sobbed, wanting her bleeding to make a difference. 

There was no change and the room was as quiet as always. Her heart sank as she once again realized she really had lost her last chance to make things right. It didn't seem fair and the anger rose inside her.

"I'm sorry!" She yelled at the cursed picture and then grabbed it wanting to throw it into a wall but stopped at the last second knowing it wouldn't change anything. It was just a picture after all.

She got up and did a tour around the house collecting every single picture of him into a box that she then put into a closet hoping he would stay there. There was no reason for him to make her feel any guiltier than she already was.

As she finished her task the phone went off like it would every week from then on, always at the same time. She knew who it was and vowed to never answer.

….

"Oh and I'd also like a glass of your Cakebread Chardonnay, please." Sue Ellen gave out her order casually as she watched Ann, making it clear she had no right to say anything.

Ann sank in her chair as they kept staring at each other, both wanting to call the other one for their mistakes but neither one willing to go into a long conversation about their own.

"Are you still seeing him?" Sue Ellen fumbled the tablecloth trying to mask the pain that she felt for even having to ask the question.

"No." Ann gasped wondering if her friend had actually thought she had gone to bed with Harris the moment the news of Bobby's passing had reached her.

She seemed relieved but not entirely convinced.

"But you will?" She eyed Ann warily.

"Don't worry Sue Ellen, that's a road I'll gladly never go down again." She sipped the tea she had ordered while she had sat waiting, surprising herself at how easily lying came to her these days. It was yet another great quality she had Harris to thank for. Too bad Sue Ellen knew an addict when she saw one.

"I'd like to see you live up to that promise. Because quite frankly Ann, I don't believe you."

"Believe what you will but there's been enough water under that bridge to last a lifetime." Ann spoke lightly but avoided her friend's gaze. It was funny how the words just kept coming out, it didn't even feel like lying as much as watching someone else take over the conversation.

"I want to believe you Ann, I really do." She leaned back in her chair and the disappointment in her eyes was enough to revive that stabbing feeling Ann had had in her stomach ever since she learned Sue Ellen had known the truth for some time. She desperately needed to know how it all had come about but at the same time she wasn't sure if she could take the pain. Then again, her daily life consisted of nothing but pain these days.

"How did you know?" Ann already knew she was expecting the question so there was no point in delaying the conversation further.

Sue Ellen gazed down, as if she still couldn't quite speak about the matter and look at her friend at the same time.

"He told me…_Bobby_ told me." She emphasized his name when she clearly became painfully aware all over again of the fact that there was another man involved, one she despised for so many different reasons.

"Did he tell you how he knew?" It killed Ann having to ask those questions because she felt she had no right but as she looked at her friend there was an understanding in her eyes that made the awkward moment a little more bearable.

"He's a smart man…_was_ a smart man." She corrected as her eyes widened at the realization. "I think you know that Ann."

The wine arrived and they both fell silent, apart from the small thank you Sue Ellen directed at the waitress. When they were alone again Ann continued.

"I do know that, but please explain it to me." She looked into her friend's eyes begging for some conclusion.

"People talk. You were seen with him in public…" She sighed and her jaw clenched as certain images appeared to fill her mind. "They were laughing about it at the office, how Mrs. Ann Ewing had been in close contact with her ex-husband. And everyone knows how ugly things were between you two. It made no sense, and so they were joking about how you probably were..." She was unable to continue and took a sip from her glass.

Ann tried to swallow the lump in her throat because she knew crying about the things she was hearing now would most likely make Sue Ellen lose all sympathy for her, the remains of it anyway. She knew she had done wrong and nothing in the world could justify it. All she could do was to own up to it with some grace.

"I can imagine what they told you. You don't have to tell me." She thought about taking Sue Ellen's hand but decided against it, it was too much too soon.

"And Bobby…he said you'd been acting differently. He didn't say how but he asked me if Harris had been harassing you. And I told him I would know if that were the case. I think that's when he knew. He told me later about his suspicions." Sue Ellen nodded as a sign that was all there was to tell and Ann saw she was fighting back the tears herself as well.

She thought back on their nights together at home, how she would either shut him out completely or ambush him out of the blue, trying to feel the way she had with Harris. She had been so focused on fighting the storm inside her she had completely missed the suspicions her behavior evoked in Bobby. She had become so self-centered, something she had never thought of herself as. The agony was falling all over her again, just in time for their lunch to arrive. It was going to be a long meal.

….

He had been so close, so real. In that state of state of haziness she had forgotten the power of one person's touch, how regardless where it was placed on her body it sent that tingly feeling into every corner of it. She had felt it burning on her face and making its way all the way down to her toes while his piercing gaze did nothing to help matters. He had stripped her off all her armor and then left her stranded with only those sensations to keep her company. She didn't want him that night, yet every fiber of her being was screaming with frustration. There was a thirst in her that couldn't be satisfied in any convenient way.

In the passing months Ann found herself thinking about the night more and more often. The thought would enter her mind just when she was finally relaxed and about to fall asleep. It crept slowly at first, the sight of him, the tall strong figure that could protect her from anything or destroy her piece by piece with the smallest effort, depending on his mood. Then it was the eyes that were able to hide everything but his desire for her body. Looking into them had once filled her with contempt but now she had to avoid them for the intoxicating waves they sent crashing over her and making her lose all sense of reason, a quality she had always been so proud to have.

With those thoughts it wouldn't be long until she imagined his hands roaming down her body and taking their time to focus on the most sensitive spots while he whispered something ever so arousing into her ear. It was his words that made her let go completely, resulting in an explosive release every time. He made her feel like she was the only woman in the world who could turn him on like that and if there was something better than that then she had not found it.

The most vivid of all her memories of him was the way his panting got louder and the way her name escaped his lips over and over again, until the moans quieted down to a mere echo on the walls surrounding them. It was like she had overwhelmed him on the inside and he needed to let it out, to gasp for air before he came into her oh so forcefully. She had tried to forget it so hard but it would still invade her thoughts at all the wrong times. At night his voice was the only sound she heard in her empty house and if it wasn't too late she would sometimes turn the TV on to make it go away. However, that would not be the case tonight.

She lay on the couch thinking about that night again. What would he have done to her had she not been so reluctant? Most likely he would have laid her down on the grass and somehow convinced her to go through with it right then and there. His body pressing down on her, his hands pulling her nightgown up, the warmth of his touch mixing with the cool summer breeze, his face over hers against the twilight sky…she knew it would have happened and that made the thought all the more tangible. Her palms were sweating now, eager to release her from the build-up she had once again allowed to happen but the realization of how much Harris would enjoy it kept her hands at bay. It was a line she would not cross, as silly as the idea sounded in her head after everything she had allowed to happen.

_Somehow he would know. The son of a bitch knew everything after all._

She jumped as her phone went off playing the chorus of Kelly Clarkson's "Never Again". It was her special ringtone selected just for him and it was also supposed to serve as a reminder to herself of what to do with his calls. It had not proven to be very effective because for some strange reason whenever she heard that song these days it would only make her smile. At least that was one failure he would never know about, she took some joy in that.

The damn phone just wouldn't stop ringing and the longer it rang the more tempted she was. The walls were already closing in on her after spending the day alone at the empty house. Surely she could answer one time, where would the harm be in that?

Her hand quickly reached for the phone flipping it open as her heart pounded in her chest. It always did when it came to him.

"Good evening, Harris." She answered cordially and wondered if for once she would be able to take hold of the conversation.

"Annie, you do know how to pick up." She could just picture the sneer he must have had on his face right then.

"Pick up, hang up, I excel at both. So please, just tell me what it is and then _stop_ calling me." Ann was somewhat curious as to how he was planning to win her over by simply calling her. He would not be able to dominate her this way, to distract her with his gaze while his hands made their subtle moves on her body. No, he wouldn't, because it wouldn't be possible now.

She was already distracted by the memory of him and the outdoor activities she had fantasized about earlier.

"I want to know what you're doing there, all by yourself all day long." He sounded sincere and it made her feel warm. It had been a while since anyone had asked how she was doing.

"I'm getting by, Harris." There was no need for him to know the extent of her sadness, guilt and hate for herself that still lurked in every corner of her mind.

"Glad to hear that." He didn't sound entirely convinced and Ann wanted to end the call before she got too emotional. Things from the past few months were coming back to her, all that darkness, it needed to stop.

"Well if that's all then thank you for calling and goodnight." She tried to sound polite as he had been so civil himself.

"Are you wearing that little thing you had on when I came to see you the last time?" The tone of his voice didn't match the sudden change of topic and it threw her off guard. It hadn't occurred to her he might have been thinking about their last meeting as much as she had. The idea of him lying in bed at night envisioning her in that nightgown and quite possibly reminiscing about their earlier encounters instantly sent shivers down her spine and the dark clouds on her mind started to clear. She was tempted to join him in the game, if only to distract herself for a while longer.

"Why I am, how did you know?" She put on her seductive voice but kept it light. He would have to know she was only teasing him.

"You always have it on in my dreams, Annie." It was hard to tell if he was speaking from the heart or just playing mind games with her. Either way she melted as his voice was what did it for her. Had he been there in person she would have already found a way to get irritated with him, but on the phone…she couldn't help but play with fire.

"I'm in your dreams, Harris? How often, may I ask?" She did her best to sound innocent knowing it would drive him crazy in the most thrilling way.

"Often enough…" By now he would usually have his hands on her. Suddenly her mouth felt dry.

"Tell me Harris…how does the Annie in your dreams compare to the real one?" She never spoke about herself in the third person, let alone use that nickname, but at that moment it didn't affect her in any way. She felt more powerful now.

"She doesn't." His answer was rather serious and it made her heart stop for a moment.

They both fell silent for a while but the atmosphere remained electric even if they couldn't see each other. Ann expected him to make a move first and she didn't have to wait for long.

"What are you doing now?" His mind seemed to be elsewhere as he posed the question, probably in something much dirtier.

"Sitting on the couch." She answered truthfully as she tugged at the hem of her nightgown.

"And your legs are all bare…"

"You could say so."

"If you put your hand on your thigh right now you could feel your skin…?" She could already envision the look in his eyes when she heard that low voice.

"I can." What was it that she had thought to herself only a moment ago? To not touch herself…not wanting Harris to know…

_Whatever._

"You're doing it now?" He took a small pause and seemed to be thinking hard. "Move your hand a little lower, towards your knee."

"Doing it." She could barely breathe as she stroked her leg leaving a trail of sweat from her fingertips.

"And then back. Keep doing that, Annie." His voice was firm and it sent a pulsating flow through her body. The top of her thigh had never felt as sensitive.

"I am…" She managed to let out as her eyes closed. His presence was so strong, even at the end of the line. Thoughts about how his hands used to roam over her legs filled her mind and her fingers dug deeper into the flesh as the images grew more vivid. The things his voice did to her, she could never let it go.

"Go on…and spread your legs." His voice was even lower now and in her hazy state she wondered if he was doing something with himself too. Ann bit her lip as she leaned back doing what he asked. Instinctively her hand moved up her thigh in hopes of soon setting fire to that sensation that was burning painfully slow.

"You know Annie…I would know just what to do with you now." He must have had that arrogant look on his face, his eyes burning into her soul and making her feel dirty…she had never been more turned on in her life.

"Mmmm…" Was all she had to say as her fingers impatiently tapped and stroked her inner thigh.

"Oh you really want it, don't you?" Harris gasped slightly as if he was surprised, yet fully aware that they both knew what he was doing to her.

"Yes…" She replied weakly as her head lay on the back rest while her chest heaved sending even more flames down to her core.

"I think you're ready then."

"Mmmm…"

"Open your eyes, Annie."

She did as told and her heart jumped to her throat. Harris was right outside the window watching her from between the nearly closed curtains. And he was clearly not to be messed with.


	10. Dark Paradise

_Author's note: Loving the reactions to the ending of the last chapter, seriously! Thank you and I hope you'll enjoy what follows, didn't want to take too long a break between these two chapters:) _

The paralyzed feeling came and went. When Ann finally jumped to her feet Harris was already at the door pulling it open and she realized just how vulnerable she had allowed herself to be. She would only lock it for the night or when she left the ranch, however rare it was these days. She hadn't cared, nothing really managed to scare her anymore.

_But this._

She ran to the door because that seemed to be the only somewhat rational way to act. As she came face to face with him her old life came flashing back to her, everything in it was familiar except the setting she was now confronting it all. He didn't say a word as he removed his jacket and put it in the closet as if he had been living there all along. Ann's eyes followed his every move with such intensity she was not sure how long she would remain conscious.

After he had closed the closet he started to approach her, his face as unreadable as ever. He saved that look especially for her because then she would never know how to prepare for him.

"Having fun, Annie?" His eyes gave her no clues but she already knew there was no escape this time.

She haltingly stepped back and he grinned as he got a good look at her body that was not as well covered as it had been the last time.

"It's gonna get a whole lot more fun." It sounded more like a warning as he took another step towards her and before she could back off her arm was already in his grasp. Something like an electric current ran through her body and as she raised her head to meet his gaze her knees gave in a bit. In only seconds after he had entered the house he already owned her, body and soul. Although she was still hoping that wouldn't be the case with the latter. There was nothing she could say and Harris seized the moment again.

"Shall I lead the way then?" He started walking her towards the stairs and she complied for lack of a decent comeback. As they headed up she suddenly felt sick. It was now clear to her what he was planning and after being in denial of so many harsh realities she was about to have them all thrown in her face.

They made it to the top of the stairs and she was now dragging her feet in his wake. There was not enough air in the hallway, to her at least. She kept gasping quietly until they stopped and that was when she felt she had forgotten how to breathe for good.

His eyes lingered on the closed bedroom door. He then smirked at Ann filling her with dread.

"I can't go in there, Harris, I can't." She shook her head nervously and bled with her eyes for him to see her anguish.

His eyes were measuring her and she couldn't figure out if they were on her side or not.

"Get in there." His voice was like calm before the storm and it made her stomach drop.

"You don't understand, Harris..." Her whole body was shaking but she tried to keep her face composed.

"Oh but I do, better than you think Annie." His hand crawled its way to her neck tilting her head backwards as he eyed her closely. She knew whatever he was planning would blow her mind, among other places, but at the same time she was very worried. It was not how she had planned to face her fears about that room.

His other hand pulled the door handle and at once she was pushed into the darkness. As she stumbled on her feet she heard the door close with a loud bang that shook her insides. She stared at the hardwood floor.

_One thing at a time._

"Don't be shy, Annie." The husky voice right next to her ear caused her to swallow hard and she had to close her eyes as she felt his hand cup her chin, pulling her head up. He came closer and lifted off one of the straps making the silky fabric fall lower down on her chest. The grip on her chin tightened as his other hand made its way to her breast, his thumb rolling over the nipple that was barely hidden under the garment. She felt him hard against her backside and there were signs of warning flashing in her mind. She wasn't sure if she could go through with it, but then again she wasn't sure of anything anymore. Her whole world had been a place of chaos and uncertainty as of late.

"You've made me wait a long time…" He pressed her more firmly against him as every word that fell off his tongue intoxicated her.

"…I don't like that." He whispered bringing her out in cold sweat.

After their tense bodies had taken a moment to battle in silence her eyes fluttered open and she became faintly aware of the dark room that she had tried to avoid for so long but most of her focus was on the lips that had landed on the curve of her neck kissing and sucking it with raw passion. His hands groped her neck and chest as they travelled lower and finally slipped under her nightgown. At finding proof of how he had affected her the movements grew more violent and he roughly pulled her panties down making Ann gasp at the reality she was facing. Her body acted mechanically as she had obediently stepped out of them and Harris almost instantly snapped the other strap down making the item of clothing fall on the floor. She had never felt more naked in her life and couldn't bring herself to turn around to face him.

She didn't have to.

"On the bed, Annie." His voice was stern but the panic rising in her chest made her hesitate. It had been a while since she had shared that bed with anyone, back when she had been happy. Just what would Bobby think of this? Even the sheer idea of him somehow finding out they were there now made her sick to her stomach. She knew it was not the moment to question what they were doing and she froze, unable to make a decision one way or another.

"Are you going to make me wait again?" He mumbled against her neck as his hands made their way to her thighs separating them and pulling her naked body against his fully clothed one. She could barely stand on her two feet as in the midst of all her confused thoughts she was being interrupted by the hardness that was firmly pressing against her, reminding her of what she had done to this man by simply standing there.

Harris groaned having had run out of patience. He grabbed her by the arm and dragged her to the side of the bed before throwing her there on her back. On her way down Ann's eyes took in some of the many details, the ceiling…she had some pleasant memories that involved watching the ceiling. Those thoughts left her mind the instant she glanced at the bedside and saw Harris's shape tower in the darkness. How could something feel outright wrong and yet so right at the same time?

She lay on the bed not daring to move and Harris stood watching her in silence, rubbing his fingers on his lips as if he was too aroused to decide what exactly to do with her. Or maybe he was just torturing her, it was impossible to tell.

After a few moments he crunched down and she lost sight of him completely but his position became clear to her when she felt his lips on her toes.

"What…" Her hips lifted off the bed as Harris began to suck on her toes gently, slowly taking each of them in turn while she tried to process why it brought out such a strong reaction in her.

_Maybe it was just him._

The waves started crashing to her core and she moaned at every sensation she felt in her lower body. His hands were feeling her legs, taking a stronger hold with each time that he sucked harder. It was like he was already inside her and it showed in her every motion.

Then he stopped.

Her eyes shot open at the sudden change and she saw him stand up. He started to remove his shirt and she lay on the bed in a helpless state, not entirely sure if he was going to make love to her or hand out punishments. All she knew was that she was desperate to feel something, anything.

His shirt was now on the floor and his leather belt was off too but instead of throwing it he came closer to the bed dropping the other end on Ann's stomach. She winced wondering if he was really going to go over the edge, she would have to stop him then. Instead he slid the belt over to her chest making circular motions and then drew it back slowly. With eyes shut she tensed as it brushed against her skin, moving down on her stomach and she bit her lip feeling the fire on her again.

"Oh Ann…" His voice was all too powerful now that all her senses were heightened in the dark. All kinds of images flew to her mind, the nights spent in that bed, never imagining it would come to this, Sue Ellen's eyes trying to figure out what was wrong with her, where her ever so proper friend had gone astray, Harris forcing his way back into her life over and over again…it was all a mess and as she realized it she didn't want to open her eyes again.

_This can't be reality._

His breathing grew louder and she knew he was close now, all naked, climbing to the bed and straddling her. The tips of his fingers brushed her inner thighs and her lips parted in anticipation. If only she would have stopped there.

"My God, Harris…" The words escaped her before she could restrain herself and as a result she squeezed her eyes shut even tighter.

_Why…?_

"I knew you could behave, Annie." His voice filled the darkness again and his fingers kept teasing her down below, making all kinds of tracks but never quite making it to their destination. She took a deep breath and opened her eyes only to come face to face with the most arrogant look she had ever seen on him.

"Aren't you glad he's gone?" He asked with all the seriousness in his voice and at the same time used both of his hands to push her legs wider apart.

Ann could not believe what she was hearing.

"Don't you dare, Harris…" His hands were still on her, causing her skin to ignite under his palms and she tried to move in order to find a less torturing position. It was useless.

"Don't tell me you didn't want this all along." He licked his teeth and softly stroked her lower abdomen.

"Why are you…" She couldn't finish as his fingers moved lower and she gasped loudly at the warmth she was met with, the pressure mixed with his voice made her body go limp and she felt she was slowly sinking into the mattress.

"Because you know what, Annie? I'm thrilled he's gone." He circled his fingers making her shudder underneath him.

_Please..._

"I wanted that to happen." Harris continued as he stroked her harder.

"I don't want to hear." She begged trying to catch her breath but failing miserably.

"You wanted me here…right here." He glanced down as his fingers made their way inside her, feeling her depths and causing her to gasp again.

"Please Harris, just…" She felt tears forming in her eyes, out of sadness and anger but most of all for the fact she could not fight him. He kept stroking her as his body lowered, his eyes fixed on hers that were trying to hide all the mixed emotions he was evoking in her. He had seen too much and she hated it.

"You know it's true, Annie. Just look at yourself…" His hand had moved to her hips keeping her in place and the tip of him was forcing its effortless entry into her as he gently stroked her hair. "You wanted him gone too."

He was inside her now, sneering at his conquest and through it all Ann could still see the struggle he faced trying to take it slow. But he was stronger than her, he always would be.

"Just admit it." He winked at her taking her hands and pulling them above her head. For Ann the anger finally got the best of her.

_He always was an asshole._

"Fuck you." She shot back but quickly whimpered as he pushed into her at the most inappropriate timing.

"That sounds about right." He responded and kissed her neck fiercely before sucking it to leave his mark. Her body trembled at everything he was doing to her but it did nothing to diminish her wrath for the man.

"No. FUCK. YOU." She exclaimed and tried to free her hands with little success.

"You want me to stop?" He asked amused.

Ann panted as she met his gaze but her mind had gone blank apart from the heat that she couldn't suppress. She felt the pressure lift off her wrists and Harris raised his eyebrows to silently pose the question once more, clearly two steps ahead of her again. She had nothing.

"That's my girl." He grinned and moved his left hand to her breast while his hips grinded against her heavily. All she could do was lie underneath him and try to hold back the moans. He didn't deserve to know just how badly she wanted it but at the same time she knew all her efforts were useless. His eyes watched her, searched for the unsaid things before his lips landed on her neck again and sucked on it in a way that was bound to leave more than a tiny mark.

"Fuck…" Her whole body shivered and her hands slammed on his back at once while her legs slowly lifted off the bed engulfing him. It was enough to induce a grunt from him, bringing him to a momentary stop.

"Fuck who?" He murmured in her ear as he clearly tried to calm his breath in order to make the sweet torture to last a little longer.

"Umm…" Her breathing was hitched and the only thing she was aware of was Harris over her, inside her in every possible way. She desperately wanted him to take care of her now, he would know how.

The silent pause was all it took for Ann to know he had understood her non-verbal request. Not that it was still enough for him.

She felt his heart pound against her chest as he gave out his last order.

"Now…unless it's my name you're screaming you better keep your little mouth shut."

His warning fell on obedient ears and her hands moved lower on his back inclined to let him take full lead and give her what she had been yearning for all those lonely nights. She felt his fingers run through her hair taking hold on both sides of her head as his lips fell onto hers and she did her best to welcome him. The tips of their tongues met and probed at each other with an intensifying speed that matched how their bodies were crashing into one another. His hands were unable to stay in one place and would at times grab her hair or clutch onto her hips pulling her as close as possible. He would pause the kissing abruptly to groan loudly and dig his fingers into her skin with no grasp on the force he was using. It was as if she had finally made him lose it and she would have been frightened had she had any coherent thoughts left.

After Harris exclaimed again, clearly too close now, he pulled out and before Ann could protest his lips were all over her, spreading warmth in a way she had only ever received from him. He threw her leg over his shoulder, keeping it there with force as his tongue explored her deeper making her body slide nearer to him in full ecstasy. Everything else around them had ceased to exist and all she knew was that she was close and it was due to Harris taking control. That was all she needed to know.

He stopped again and she threw her head back in frustration, still aware that it would be worth it. No words were being exchanged anymore and when he was near enough Ann pulled him by the arms to bring him closer inducing a look of pure madness in his eyes. He filled her again and it didn't take long until she cried out holding him with all her might as her body erupted in unexplainable pleasure. Her legs were wrapped around him, digging into him as a thank you for the release he had finally given her. She would have sobbed into his shoulder had she had absolutely no self-control. Luckily some had remained.

He didn't say a word for his body was doing all the talking. Slowly but surely he continued to thrust into her rocking her now exhausted but content body under him until he too reached his peak loudly before sinking his head into her neck, fingers trailing the sides of her as if trying to remind himself that she was very real.

"God Annie…"

Her arms wrapped tightly around his neck and she wasn't sure if she could ever let go.


	11. In Darkness

"_Give it time Harris, just give it time."_

"_For how long, Annie?"_

"_How many years do you have left on this earth?"_

"_Given my track record, less than you for sure."_

"_Then give it forever, Harris."_

Her words still echoed in his ear as he woke up and reacquainted himself to the slightly unfamiliar surroundings. After all, most of his attention that night had been on details of far greater importance. There wasn't much to take in and the more he looked around the more his mind filled up with unpleasant visuals of what used to take place in that particular bedroom. He switched it off as if it was a TV channel he had got bored with, it was a gift he had been given long ago and it could be applied to most things in his life, all except one and she was lying next to him.

The control he had gained on his thoughts was almost too blissful to give up for one look at her, still the most graceful thing he had ever set his eyes on. Of course he couldn't help but allow his gaze to linger over to her side, just like he couldn't resist playing with her before and letting it cause chaos around him. Ann would always be his serenity and turmoil all in one, such a distracting little thing she was.

As his eyes landed on her peaceful face the dream came back to him in an almost threatening way. It had felt very vivid, invasive even, which gave Harris an uncomfortable feeling for he had a strong distaste for the unknown. He hastily shook it off again.

Watching her a million thoughts ran through his mind and she must have sensed how the atmosphere changed because her eyes soon fluttered open. Clearly aware of his stare she chose not to move but she was definitely very awake.

"What's ya thinking, Annie?" His voice cut through the thick air in the room.

"I don't like being here." She answered truthfully.

_Well that can be fixed._

"Now where would you like to be?" He turned on his side to face her but she remained lying on her back.

"Somewhere where I have everyone I need…but it can't be here. And such place does not exist, that I know."

"Oh I think that can be arranged. You get in my car right now and I'll take you home." He said it jokingly but deep down meant every word.

"That's not my home, Harris, far from it." She almost smiled but the traces of it soon faded. "And besides it will never work like this. There's Sue Ellen, my family…no." The fact she didn't mention herself did not go unnoticed by Harris but he chose to ignore it for the time being.

"They don't have to know."

_Not yet anyway._

She shook her head. "Oh please, they'll know in a heartbeat, Harris. It's rather unlike you to underestimate other people besides me."

He wasn't really listening anymore as a certain memory suddenly filled his mind. He had had her in bed just like this twenty years ago and she had said something very similar.

"_One day you'll see just how little you thought of me."_

"_What's that supposed to mean?"_

"_That will be up to you, Harris."_

The painful image made him swallow hard and when he realized she was looking at him he figured he might as well say it for she had already seen more than he had intended to show.

"I can't have you walk out on me again, Annie." The words burned in his throat but saying them out loud did nothing to ease the discomfort. If anything, the ache only spread deeper.

She sensed the seriousness of what he had just confessed and emotions long since repressed flashed on her face. What a joy it was to have a woman like her, wise in some ways, weak in others and with a soul that she could not hide from the world. He would never get tired of that combination. It relieved the pain a little.

"Where am I gonna walk when you're always here?" Her words held the same amount of seriousness as his had.

"You'll just stay here, with me." Something about being in that intimate space alone and only surrounded by the darkness of the night made him carry on. At that moment he didn't feel as intimidated as he normally would, although at the back of his mind he could hear a voice that carried a warning.

_She has something on you now._

He could see it now, it was as if she had grown an inch or two before him. And it was all at hearing his words.

"I wish you'd realize it Harris, this is all you're ever gonna get from me. So come morning, if you are smart you will leave me alone." He could hear the strain behind the strictness of her tone but it was very faint and didn't stop her from going on.

"You can't fix me now, not ever. I will never be what you want from me."

It was amazing how she managed to sound so full of herself even when she put herself down, as if he wouldn't be able to see what she was and what she could be. He had always seen it all. It was only in the way she chose to project the depths of her mind out to the world that she would always get it wrong. It irritated him to no end.

"Look in the mirror, Annie. You are what you are and I haven't changed either. You should know what that means by now."

"It means you want a puppet, Harris. You always did and now I'm just broken enough for you to want me even more. But you can't turn me into the thing you have created in your mind, I know you. You just seem to forget that sometimes." She placed her hands on her stomach, apparently in an effort to look resolute.

"I do?" He was burning up inside and not in the good way. Nevertheless she had just given him an opportunity that was not to be missed. He leaned in closer and kissed her neck before she had time to process what was happening.

_So sweet._

"Please Annie, do tell me all the things I've forgotten..." His teeth scraped her skin as he hissed the words near her ear and the way her skin quivered under his lips told him everything he needed to know. He put his hand on hers and gave them both a tight squeeze while he continued to explore the area.

"You don't get it, Harris…" She went on doing her best to keep the tone of her voice normal. "I hurt so much these days."

"Are you hurting now?"

"No, it's…" She was cut short when Harris sucked on her neck a little harder while his hand slipped under the fabric on her chest.

"How 'bout now?" he whispered brushing the sensitive spot with his thumb.

"I don't…" Ann gasped and right at that moment Harris tweaked it making it harder for her to keep her voice to that low decisive tone.

"I can give you any kind of pain you want, Annie." He kept brushing and pinching her nipple at random intervals in no rush for anything in particular while his lips continued their journey.

"I know that." Her voice was weak because the truth always hurt her. If there was ever a way to help Ann get over anything it was to punish her enough before she had time to do it herself. He rose on top of her pulling off the covers and felt his heartbeat quicken at the contact his legs made with her hers. How any man had ever been able to resist her was a complete mystery to him.

"It will help you forget." He looked down at her, so many things clouding his eyes.

"Maybe I don't want to forget, Harris." She sighed as she writhed under him. "Maybe I want to deal with this on my own. I got myself into this situation and it will be for me to get out of it."

"The way you got over Emma? Face it Ann, you can't do it." He placed his hands on her arms forcing them down but quickly loosened his grip upon feeling her resistance. She sure was getting angry fast. It wasn't something he wanted but at the same time it was just too tempting.

"What a smart move, Harris, to bring Emma into this. Why don't you bring up the past some more? I can guarantee you it will work in your favor." She fired the words at him in a sweet rage.

"Still got that cockiness, huh?"

"You're the one to talk."

"I've earned my right to be cocky, Annie. You haven't." And to make his point clear he pinched her some more. She was in need of a reminder.

"I want you to…"

"…stop?"

"Yes…" Nothing in her voice was asking him to complete that request but at the same time he was certain that had he turned on the light those beautiful eyes would have glistened. He was grateful for his shadow that now hovered over her.

"You aren't gonna cry again, are you?" It sounded more like a warning than a compassionate plea even though for some reason he had gone for the latter. Her eyes fell to his chest in an attempt to escape him the best they could.

"Let's just sleep now, Harris." Ann's voice almost broke and at that moment Harris silently cursed the weakness of her mind. Couldn't she keep herself together for a few minutes?

He groaned out of frustration as he fell back to his side of the bed and out of the corner of his eye he was sure he saw her sigh a breath of relief.

Well if she thought she was going to get a good night's sleep now she was badly mistaken.

_Give it time. An hour or two, maybe?_


	12. No-one Else Here Will Save You

_He is everywhere… _

The Sun still had yet to rise when Ann opened her eyes for his presence did not allow her to catch that sleep she so desperately needed. She knew she had to clear her head in order to process everything that had happened earlier that night but it was not going to happen with him lying next to her, drawing those large chunks of air that used to belong to her. God he was loud. Or was it just in her head?

Ann quickly glanced over to his side, careful not to make a sound, and realized he didn't have much of an effect on her now that he was asleep. How he had made a mess out of her only hours before was a mystery to her now. He wasn't intimidating, no, he was just a man and she had been through enough in her life to be able to handle one of those. She took a shuddering breath as she pondered on this new realization. There was no room for Harris Ryland in her life, had not been for a long time. So why did she let him in again? Should she finally take a stand and quit once and for all? She had never really tried before, even when she thought she had cut him out of her life he was still on her mind every single day and she now understood she had been waiting for him. No break could ever be long enough to set her free for good.

For years Ann had been certain he didn't deserve her after everything he had done but maybe tables had turned now. Maybe he was all she would ever deserve. To her horror even that option seemed too good in regards to her prior actions for she had just had the most exciting night in weeks.

_Or more like in years. _

She silently turned on her side to face him. It was a rare occasion to have a chance like that to really look at him and be reminded of the looks that had once made her heart race at every glance he granted her way. She had treasured them for all their worth and quietly expected him to lose interest as soon as he would realize how undeserving she was of such attention. He was way out of her league as Judith had so kindly reminded her at every given chance. That insecure feeling had never really left her and even now after everything he had put her through she still felt a need to repay him in some way for giving her his time. However, that feeling would soon change into an urge to kick him out immediately. Because who did he think he was after all? As angry as he made her she couldn't deny the earthmoving effect he had on her.

He still had those strong features she had always admired in men, the grey beard that only enhanced his handsomeness, always so neatly groomed. Under his eyes there were slight wrinkles that had now mostly faded into his skin due to his relaxed state, yet the brows remained furrowed as if he was still unable to completely loosen up, even in his sleep. And then there were those lips…

She realized she had been clutching her pillow with both hands unable to stop admiring him. If there was any justice in the world a man like Harris Ryland would not have been graced with looks like that. Such violations should be fought by every capable person instead of letting those bastards roam free, to seek pleasure in every weak individual who happened to cross their path.

But when you pass a certain point in your life, some earlier and some later but eventually they all do, you learn that unfairness exists everywhere. It finds its way to crawl into your life and fill it with uncertainty, sadness and anger among other things. Ann had had her share of all of the above and she knew somehow they and her would always co-exist. So why fight it? She could kick him out but in the end it would change nothing.

In the midst of all her conflicted thoughts she had momentarily closed her eyes but was quickly brought back when she felt a hand weasel its way to her neck and then to the back of her head where it gently stroked her hair. As soon as she saw his fully conscious face he had already twisted his fingers and taken a firmer hold to pull her nearer. She stared at him as if he was a dream that had just turned real, so rapidly had everything changed. Without saying a word he leaned closer, eventually closing the unnecessary gap between them and she welcomed his kiss with a soft gasp. The moment their lips met she felt his warmth tingle its way all the way down to her toes that curled up against the sheets. The way his lips worked on her hungrily made her wonder if he had actually slept at all. He had always been easy to wake up but definitely not this quick.

His hands roughly pulled up her nightgown squeezing her hips along to way, happy to see she had lost the underwear when she hastily redressed earlier. A little distance between them was needed when she raised her arms to help him get rid of the item of clothing but after throwing it to the side he instantly pulled her naked body back in. She got lost in him as his hands furiously ran over every inch of her skin that was in their reach and the fact he couldn't contain himself the way he usually did aroused her even more. He definitely had been lying there next to her on the brink of death while she slept.

She felt his hand on the back of her head again as his lips returned to hers. He only really needed one hand to hold her in place. The other one was much lower and she shivered against his lips when his fingers made their way down and only gently brushed her. Her lips parted more begging him to give her something but instead of kissing her he merely watched her as he touched her again. Her head fell down while she struggled to handle the slower pace he was now using to get to her. Slowly his fingers reached for her again before quickly pulling back and he repeated the motion several times until she was a complete mess bleeding with her eyes. There was only so much he could take and she knew the time had come when his breathing reached that particular peak.

"Annie...hold onto me." He panted out leaning just close enough for her to feel his hot breath blowing softly on her cheek. Every part of her body was burning up and she still had a strong urge to get nearer to the source of that heat. As his fingers easily slipped inside she inhaled sharply and clasped onto his arm using force she normally would have apologized for but right now she wasn't even aware of it. He was making her hotter in a way that surprised even herself, it was good and torturous and bringing her higher than she had been in a while.

Her reaction to his touch was clearly having a huge effect on Harris as his breathing grew louder with each time he stroked her deeper, twisting and turning while she struggled to hold onto her sanity. All she wanted was to scream out loud, possibly even bite him. Where those thoughts came from Ann had no idea but right then another ingenious move from him made her mind go blank. She pushed herself closer to him and wrapped one leg around his body. That massive need for closeness terrified her but in that moment of heat it was also too arousing to ignore.

He was there as well, with every breath she felt on her skin, the way his hand gently tugged her hair in perfect rhythm with his breathing, she knew he was on a new kind of high and nothing was going to stop them now. She buried her face in his chest bringing him into a slightly aggressive state which only turned her on more. Her arms had started to shake after being so tightly clasped onto him and soon her whole body was reacting in a similar way, yet she didn't want to let go. The pleasure he was bringing her was something she had missed gravely.

"Please Harris…" She muffled into his chest unable to stop herself. She felt his hand slide down on her neck upon hearing her words, bringing a little distance between them so that he could hear her better.

"Tell me what you want, Annie."

For the first time she saw how completely entranced he was by her and it took her a moment to fathom what that meant for them. Ann had seen it before and she knew she was right. This was not just talk in the moment of passion, this was a man in love. In some twisted way Harris Ryland was in love with her and as it hit her all she could see was a dead end to their road. There was no way out, never would be.

She decided to worry about that later for now all she could truly focus on was the sweet pressure he had built her up with.

"Tell me." He was growing impatient.

She wanted to see how he would react, no pride left to hold her back anyway. Her eyes ventured up to meet his as her lips nervously parted in preparation of what was to come out.

"Make love to me."

At hearing her words his gaze shifted for a moment as if he had been caught in the act but his usual demeanor soon returned and for some reason she was grateful for it.

He softly pushed her down, careful not to lose too much contact with her and seconds later his lips were on hers searching for that perfect spot to make an entrance. He took his sweet time.

"I always do, Annie." He whispered against her lips bringing a quiet moan out of her. By her initiative their legs tangled up in fight for both control and closeness while Ann wrapped her arms around his neck to pull him in for a fiery kiss. He seemed to have no objections and she already knew he was fighting hard to keep himself from entering her. What was he waiting for anyway? She decided to make her intentions all the more clear by sliding her foot along his leg and as she observed his face she noticed how his eyes closed even tighter. Out of the blue he slammed his hand against the mattress and left her lips so he could hover right above her face.

His eyes were so dark.

"Now why don't ya…give me a little ride, Annie?"

It was exactly what she wanted but it took her a moment for it to sink in, and when it did she let it show. Harris's mouth halfway curved into a smile that quickly faded and was replaced by a twitch of pure hunger. His hands traced the sides of her thighs before moving up and taking a firm grip of her waist to swiftly turn them both over and to pull her on top of him. Ann fought for balance with her hands surprised by the strength he possessed. Every time he showed her just what he was capable of it made her feel both safe and vulnerable. It was definitely one blazing combination.

Her heart hammered in her chest as she straddled him. Whatever was happening inside her at that moment she didn't recognize it. The tranquility at which he welcomed her both thrilled and frightened her at the same time. She was up, practically holding his heart in her hand and yet she had never felt less in control. Her teeth clacked and she immediately pressed her lips tightly shut. She didn't know what it was but it was definitely due to whatever he was doing to her body and mind by just lying there.

She let him fill her while her mind battled with the surrealism of the situation, the room, the bed, him…she would not think about any of it. If she allowed those thoughts to enter her head for even one second she would break. Hands trembling on his chest she let her head tip down, hair falling over her face to shield her from the temporarily weakened monster that still held her in his grasp every minute of the day.

"Let me see you." His hand caressed her cheek encouraging her to lift her chin up and see what lied beneath her. She obliged in a shaking manner and when their eyes met something entirely different took over her. The gentle touch didn't match the fire in his eyes that were telling her there was much, much more burning behind them and she desperately wanted to bring it out.

She caught a better glimpse of it at the first move her hips made on him. The wait for her had built him up even more than she had realized and the sounds that escaped his lips as he slowly tilted his head back made her heart race at an alarming speed. His hand slid lower and the other one joined as they began to massage her chest with growing force. Even the slightest move she made got him all fired up and she was soon addicted to the thrill. It was joyous to watch him in that state he had so often got her in, even if it was only because he allowed for it to happen now. Ann grinded her teeth as she gave him a taste of it again, and again until his hands fell to her hips and he groaned in a serious effort to prolong what seemed like a torturous ordeal for him now. Oh it was so sweet. She wanted to make him scream, to really know what he had done to her. The trick was to not let him know it was her plan for he would never ever be willing to lose a fight with her, come it at whatever price it may.

She closed her eyes and slowed down, pretending to only do so because she was too close, and then proceeded to gently feel his chest with her palms. It was burning up for her, just like his heart was pounding at the random movements she made with her hips to keep him on the edge. She couldn't resist looking at him and as she did so he grinned a little before mouthing something rather dirty to her. She stopped for a moment having lost her breath. How did he do that?

And then he gave her a wink.

All too late it hit her that she had already been found out. He lifted his hand to roll his thumb over her lower lip and gazed straight into her eyes with a commanding stare that was impossible for her to ignore, and so she started to rock her hips again all her plans having gone out the window. He pulled her hands forward pressing them on his chest again and closed his eyes in what seemed like heavenly pleasure for him. It wasn't enough for her and she tore them free before placing them on both sides of him and changing the ankle. The loud groan that welcomed this change of pace pleased her but she was already near. He was now watching her clearly aware of it and she swallowed abruptly at the desire that was very visible in his eyes, as if he was watching a piece of art being carved to its final brilliant shape and form. Every time she looked at him and saw his stare she came closer until it was just not possible to stop it anymore. Her body trembled as the warmth exploded inside her and through her flickering eyelids she could see him marvel at the sight.

She fell forward but her hands somehow still supported her enough to keep her from crashing onto him, although he probably would have liked that. His fingers traced her arms while she still kept clenching around him.

"You ain't gonna be no match for me, Annie." He held his hand to her cheek as she tried hard to regain her composure. Hearing the husky voice in her ears did nothing to help matters.

"But I do love to see you try." The smile was evident from his tone.

When she met his gaze once more he looked perfectly composed, a sign that she had had her fun and now it was time for Harris to have his. His hands moved to her back slowly but firmly pulling her down on top of him and as she got closer he sighed with satisfaction. She then kissed his chest with subliminal gratitude for what he had given her, for a moment she had felt strength and life fill her soul and only a day ago sensations like that had been a distant memory. She craved for more even if came with the price of guilt.

_Oh that horrible guilt. _

It was the kind of grief that needn't be dealt with until tomorrow.


	13. Do You Think You Can Find It?

_Author's note: Thank you for the amazing reviews, my heart is basically bursting for all the love. You're the best! So, I've finally figured how to end this and if I don't change my mind a million times like I've done throughout the writing process then this should be the first of the last 5 chapters. I do want to keep writing A/H stuff if there are readers so I'll just think of something new then:) _

It was on the third ring of the doorbell that Ann realized she was not dreaming. She sprung up from the bed and rushed to the window. Her eyes widened at the sight of the familiar white Porsche in the yard and she immediately turned around.

"Harris, wake up and listen!" She shook him roughly by the shoulder trying to keep her voice stern despite the rising panic. Life had once again gotten far too exciting for her own good.

Harris opened his eyes in a calm manner and Ann couldn't tell if he had been asleep or awake but nevertheless it made her even more anxious. She tried to compose herself fully well knowing Harris would take a great deal of pleasure from her agitation.

"Sue Ellen is at the door and I'm going down now. And _you_, do not make a sound! Do you understand?" She waited a moment expecting to hear a snarky response but his face remained expressionless and so she straightened up and searched the room with her eyes to try and find her robe. She had barely moved when a hand all too strong for her had wrapped its fingers around her wrist. It felt so hot against the chill that now ran through her veins.

_Would have been too easy… _

She turned her head to look and saw him grin as he put his finger to his lips. Then after taking just enough time to make her uneasy he finally let go. Ann blinked a few times having completely forgotten what she was doing. As it came back to her she took the robe off the chest, threw it on and quickly tied the sash before she ran down the stairs her heart racing much faster than she would have liked. For a moment she toyed with the idea of fainting right then and there instead of having to deal with both Harris and Sue Ellen so soon after waking up. It was definitely not doing any good to her health, she thought.

As Ann opened the door she noticed how the look on Sue Ellen's face rapidly changed from impassive to one of surprise. And what was she staring at? Ann quickly glanced over her shoulder which she immediately realized had been a huge mistake as it made her look even guiltier. Oh certainly everything could still be salvaged.

She held onto that small sliver of hope the last few seconds before Sue Ellen spoke.

"That's a lovely bite you've got there, Ann." Every word from Sue Ellen came out with a little sting to it and Ann felt she had shrunk much smaller while her eyes tried with no success to see what was clearly very visible on her neck. She envied the ants down at their feet, they may have been small but at least they could always run away.

Unable to come up with an excuse Ann lifted her gaze again, merely gaping at Sue Ellen as she stepped inside. Usually at this time of the day she would be fully awake and maybe have gone for a ride already but Harris had completely messed up her routine, all of them. She felt every bit the mess she knew she looked like.

"Really Ann, I'm impressed." Sue Ellen continued after finding the perfect spot in the middle of the room. "And here I thought J.R. could be rough but you...you've certainly got something there." She nodded at Ann eyebrows raised.

Before Ann could come up with anything in reply she saw the change in Sue Ellen's expression again and this time she didn't have to wonder what the cause was. She slowly turned around to see Harris dressed and dapper happily making his way down the stairs. How he managed to look so presentable when she came across more as a victim of physical assault was another irritating mystery to her.

"Ladies." He nodded as he checked his phone before putting it in his pocket. "I wish you a lovely day."

They both stared at him at a loss for words. When he had reached the door he stopped and turned around.

"Oh and Ann…I'll see you very soon." He winked and with that he was out, leaving nothing but shock and confusion behind. To Ann that had started to seem like the normal routine whenever he was involved. She rolled her eyes at the situation too tired to even get angry with him. Because after all, what would be the point? To her misfortune Sue Ellen had yet to reach that state of mind.

"Have you lost your mind? What is someone had come over?" She snapped the moment the door had closed.

Ann knew she was referring to Christopher but the stress of the morning had gotten to her and at once she remembered all the plus sides to being alone.

"Who? Who is gonna come over?" She shot back at her friend who was slightly startled by the sudden defensive reaction. Ann felt the lump in her throat again. It was like Sue Ellen had found the very same magic button Harris loved to keep pushing. She hated being at the mercy of everyone's opinion of her. The words she had been screaming inside for months finally came out as she took a step forward.

"Cos let me tell you something, _no one_ comes here anymore!"

Sue Ellen's anger seemed to have vanished as quickly as the man that had partly initiated it and there was now sadness in her eyes.

"Oh Ann…" She shook her head.

"It's my fault." Ann quickly cut her off. "I drove them away."

They both fell silent and Sue Ellen looked into the scared and wandering eyes waiting for Ann to continue. After seeing the sad look on her friend's face Ann figured saying something about the fateful day now couldn't possibly make things any worse than they already were.

"I think I just feel at blame here and I can't stand to look at them knowing what I know about that night." She blurted out quietly trying to keep her voice from breaking.

"What do you mean?"

"I was with him that day, Sue Ellen..." She thought about how much detail was necessary to share. "…and Bobby went after him."

The shock was evident on Sue Ellen's face but she quickly shook it off. Ann was grateful that she hadn't tried to torture her any more even though she easily could have in so many unobtrusive ways.

"And you think Bobby died because of you?" It came out as more of a statement and it told her they were both on the same page.

"It's not just that…it's everything involving this. I'm sorry for even telling you these things because the burden is all mine and I'm only selfish to share it with you." Ann looked down not feeling any better after the revelation.

"Ann…it's true I'm not okay with this and I'm not sure if I ever will be…" The words got stuck in Sue Ellen's throat when she saw her friend's pained expression.

"You don't have to be." Ann begged with all the sincerity she had in her.

Sue Ellen ignored her plea and continued.

"But you have to get over this, and I'm not talking about Bobby but all this…you owe me that much. It's all I ask of you, Ann."

Ann froze for a moment and then quietly nodded, clueless as to how she was to fulfill this promise but happy to be given a chance to make up for a small part of her sins.

….

_What a perfect day. _

Harris tapped at his desk happily as he eyed the figures he had just been sent. Everyone was doing their job to their best ability with just enough fear on their backs and only less than 12 hours ago Ann had been on her back too. He shook his head and chuckled. Oh it had been good, better than he had pictured in his head and he certainly had rehearsed it in his mind on more than one occasion before show time.

She had been just the right amount of intimidated and in need for him, and everything she had gone through in the past months had done nothing to kill animal he knew she was inside. If anything, she had become more explosive, more…he couldn't quite put a finger on it. It definitely needed to be explored more. And she was still every bit as stunning, give it a year or 20 of them. Nothing could destroy the beauty that was her Annie and he was now grateful he had not succeeded in his day either. The way she had surrendered to him after realizing she did not stand a chance in hell, it was better than any deal he had closed in the last couple of decades. Every test he put her through she had passed with flying colors. How rewarding had that night been, quite possibly the best night of his life for it was all he could remember now. He thought about her on top of him, barely able to look at him after she had so obediently done what he had asked. It was suddenly very hot in the office.

_That face…_

He tried to envision her standing in his office again, perhaps wearing that long red dress with the deep v-cut neckline and ruffled off-the-shoulder sleeves he had got her for their third anniversary, the one he still kept in his house hidden from everyone. And she would definitely be in heels, those red ones that she would not be allowed to take off until he had had his fun. Harris still remembered all the eager eyes that had followed her that night as he did his best to shelter her. How dangerous that woman could have been had she known the effect she had on men. Nothing else in his life had satisfied him nearly as much as having her give into him, but when she practically begged him for it…well that was a whole another story, something unimaginable. You had to experience it to really know what it meant, to have every need in your body fulfilled with a simple connection between two minds. It was as fascinating as it had been the first time around and even his fears had started to subside. Now that he didn't have to hear all her doubts he was filled with new hope.

The phone went off and brought him out of his pleasant thoughts. He signed heavily as he figured anything he was about to hear would not come even close to the greatness his mind was occupied with. However, his face lit up when he saw who it was and he was instantly happy to answer.

"Well hi Annie. Had a nice chat with Sue Ellen?"

There was a small pause and he figured Ann must have had a speech prepared that she was now trying to re-write in her head, much to his disappointment. He had actually hoped for a fiery discussion starting with a fight over how he had left and hopefully ending with all the fun a phone could provide.

_Well there's always hope._

"Harris…" She started with uncertainty. "…you realize what the situation between Sue Ellen and me is now?"

_Ah, questions._

"I think you care too much for what that woman thinks." He said it without much thought. What a mind-numbing topic, this third person seemed to play a far bigger part in their relationship than was necessary.

"_That woman_ happens to be the closest friend I have in this life and right now we're hanging by a thread. The least you could do is let me fix things, not pop out of nowhere and show off our…whatever this is…before I get a chance to explain." She was getting furious and Harris's mood was instantly lighter.

"I see where you're getting at Annie but do answer this, just how would Sue Ellen feel about you lying to her face?"

"It's not necessarily lying…" She must have realized she had been cornered. "…but anyway, back to my original question. Sue Ellen's friendship means the world to me. Do you understand that? Is there any part of you that can comprehend what I've gone through? Because quite frankly sometimes I think I'm just a toy to you."

Harris couldn't think of an answer right away, and he also figured it might be for the best to stall a little, to give an impression he really had thought about her words profoundly.

"Did you feel like _just a toy to me_ last night?" He tested the waters as the lovely images flashed in his mind.

"That's not an answer, Harris."

"Because if that's the impression you got then I may have to…prove myself in another way."

"Will you quit with the riddles already."

"I'm talking about sex, Annie."

_Jeez._

She hung up. This surprised Harris, and frustrated him quite a bit too for he still had several unused comebacks for her question, none of which actually answered it.

….

Ann could have kicked herself. She had once again let Harris Ryland get close to her and it shouldn't have come as a surprise that she would be paying the price first thing the morning after. After their phone call she could already see him telling all about their night to one or more of his seedy business associates over a drink after work. She didn't actually believe it would happen but the sheer idea seemed all too realistic now and it made her very uncomfortable. He would never listen to her nor respect her. All he was good for these days were those nights he made her feel wanted but everything else…it had been 20 years and she should have known better by now.

However, those thoughts only occupied her mind for a moment. She didn't want to know better nor do the right thing. All she wanted was to do what felt good for life was too short after all. This was where her mind was mostly at and she knew it would never change. The Harris Ryland way of life had finally caught up with her.

As the clock struck six p.m. the doorbell rang yet again that day and it made her jump. She was not in the mood for any more visitors she told herself but deep down she was happy for the distraction. Something needed to happen to save the day. Surely it couldn't be anything worse than what had come about that very morning.

She opened the door to find a nice looking young man, most likely in his mid-20s, wearing a dark suit and holding a silver cardboard box with both hands. It was a very strange sight on the ranch but she remembered a time and a place where it had been nothing out of the ordinary.

"Miss Ewing?" He asked politely, as if he knew what a large meaning there was behind those two words.

Ann nodded slightly confused but her hunch was already letting her know of the only possible explanation, something he soon confirmed.

"Mister Ryland sent me. He wanted you to have this and think of the things it represents." He handed the box and Ann carefully took it as it seemed rather expensive. She always showed the appropriate amount of respect for the finer things, even if they came from Harris.

"I'll wait here." He gestured at the black limo Ann now noticed was behind him. "Would an hour be enough for you to get ready?"

"Get ready for what?" Ann wasn't sure if she was hearing right.

"For your meeting with Mister Ryland." Ann could see he was getting nervous for the Harris inflicted panic was written all over his face but he seemed to be able to keep his cool for the most part.

_Meeting. Seriously?_

"And what if I can't make it?" Ann instantly regretted even asking when she saw the fear flash in the poor guy's eyes. She would not be responsible for getting him in trouble with Harris.

"Nevermind, I'll be back in half an hour." She smiled warmly at him and this seemed to make the errand guy's entire day.

After making her way back inside she opened the box right away and could not believe her eyes.

_It can't be…_

It was the very same red dress he had once bought her, something he normally didn't like to see her wearing as it was quite revealing but that one anniversary night had been a lovely exception. He had not even raged at her for all the attention she got that night. Back then she was sure had she not been on his arm no one would have given her a second look but she knew better now. There were men who wanted her and that had been his one weakness, she just didn't realize it at the time. Oh how she wished she had. It was only later that she was shown what it meant to be loved and cared for. Her thoughts were beginning to drift to dangerous territories, those being the last 8 years, and she forced them out of her mind even though she knew they would never fully leave her.

She directed her thoughts back to the dress and wondered just how certain Harris had been that it would still fit her. If it didn't then she would not go even if it meant for his employee to lose his job. You had to draw the line somewhere after all.

It did fit.

In exactly 30 minutes Ann came out wearing the dress and red heels, a combination that had felt a tiny bit too daring to her but then again there was a limo in the yard. Besides after the previous night she knew regardless of how he acted he was still crazy about her and this was the perfect opportunity to tease him a little. She had only applied make up lightly knowing Harris could tell when she was making an effort and she would not be doing any chasing tonight. Seeing the appreciative look on the driver's face she knew that whatever Harris had planned for them it was going to be fun for her.

….

Ann couldn't get a word out of the man on their way and she was relieved when they eventually pulled up at the Omni Hotel. As the door was opened for her all the lights and the city noises made her head spin and for a moment she would have liked nothing more than to stay inside the vehicle and head back home. She gathered all her strength and taking the driver's hand she got out. He left the car to the valet and Ann couldn't help but wonder what the guy's job description entailed exactly. He seemed to be full of confidence as he led Ann inside the hotel and into the elevators. This made her nervous as she had expected a public date. Why go through all this trouble to get her into a room alone? She felt nervous and a little annoyed with Harris again.

They got off at one of the top floors and Ann got more anxious by the minute as she was being led through the hallway. When they reached the door he opened it with a keycard and gestured at her to go inside. For a brief moment Ann wondered if there were any serial killers who operated this way but she supposed that would have been too far-fetched and so she stepped inside the room that was already lit. As the door closed behind her leaving the man outside she could not have been more surprised by the other person standing in the room. It was Sue Ellen wearing a black skirt suit.

"Ann…what…?" She seemed to be just as surprised and before Ann could say anything there was another click at the door. They both watched intently as the man of the hour entered the room.

"Sue Ellen, Annie." Harris nodded at them both separately. "I think it's time we all had a little chat."

Ann looked at him in disbelief.

"Oh and…" He continued looking at Sue Ellen. "…after that I'd like to take Ann out."

He paused for a moment and smirked.

"If that's okay with you."


	14. But the Mountains Will Shake

_Author's note: Well it was supposed to be four chapters remaining but this one was getting so long so I decided to split it in two. So after this…four chapters remaining;) Thank you so much for the reviews! I've been thinking about this chapter a lot, since the very first ones when I decided to make it a full story. So yeah…tricky one, hope you like it:)_

The tension in the room had quickly reached a new high for Ann. Not only was Sue Ellen watching them while knowing exactly where Harris's teeth had been the night before but the man himself seemed to be eating her with his eyes in that subtle manner that he could have kept entirely hidden had he wanted to. He never wanted to for he enjoyed trying people, seeing who would get uncomfortable and who would make the futile attempt to stand up to him and act as if his attention didn't matter to them one bit.

Ann resisted the urge to fling her hand at the mark on her neck. Even though she thought she had done a splendid job covering it up, using practically half of the contents in her make-up bag, it was knowing that it was there that made her feel tied to him. She felt him on her skin just as his eyes bored into her even when she wasn't looking at him. It was an obstacle she would have to overcome she thought as she raised her gaze to challenge him in that silent mind game. Did he flinch just now? Well it was quite a dress. She batted her eyelashes feeling brave.

"I knew there was something fishy about this meeting and I should have known it was you behind it." Sue Ellen appeared almost bored with him as she spoke. Ann had to give her credit for showing him there were still women out there unaffected by his charm. Harris chuckled as he eyed her but saved the more sinful glances for Ann.

"Now if you'll excuse me, I actually do have things of importance to occupy my time with." She turned to leave but was stopped short by Harris's more commanding voice.

"No one is leaving this room until you two settle this." The authoritative tone made Ann weak at her knees and she tried her hardest to not let it show. Getting excited now was wrong on so many levels. Her friend however was in a different place.

"Oh you've got to be kidding me." Sue Ellen snapped rolling her eyes.

"I don't kid. That would be a waste my time and it's quite valuable, you should know." He sneered at her and Ann felt a tug of jealousy over the fact that he was being cocky with another woman. It was definitely a first. Sue Ellen narrowed her eyes still completely unaffected.

"Whatever you are trying to solve between Ann and I has absolutely nothing to do with you. I couldn't care less if you went up in flames like the devil you are right at this moment."

"Makes no difference to me what you think of me, Sue Ellen. But little Annie here has been quite distraught so would you give her a break already?"

"Are you really gonna let him talk about you like that?" She shot back at Ann who was eyeing Harris with growing curiosity.

"Don't worry, Sue Ellen." She paused and threw a meaningful glance at him.

"It's just an act."

Ann could see the small flash of panic on his face before he recomposed himself. Inside she was cheering.

"Harris would you be a dear and leave this room. I have things to discuss with Ann, _in private_." Sue Ellen had a commanding tone of her own, the kind that mothers use on badly behaving kids and for some reason it seemed to work on the likes of Harris too.

"Why of course. Just don't keep me waiting too long." He emphasized this by tapping his watch but she had already turned her back on him.

….

The two women were left standing in the room facing each other and Ann figured it was best to let Sue Ellen speak first. If she kept letting her do that then maybe eventually there would be no words left, only the warm and understanding friendship that they had treasured for so long. She sensed they were both just as tired of the situation.

"It's your life, Ann. You can do with it whatever you wish. What I don't like is that he's already keeping you on your toes."

"That's just the way he is. Keeping people on their toes is what he does." Ann replied immediately and it dawned on her that she was defending him. Since when had she started to do that?

"Are you sure you're not suffering from the Stockholm syndrome?" Sue Ellen asked jokingly making them both laugh a little and Ann felt a weight was being lifted off her. It felt so good to be that way with her again. They smiled at each other and for a moment no words were needed.

"I just miss him so much, Ann." She continued on a more serious but not in any way accusatory tone. "And it just seemed to me that you didn't care at all. That you had changed into someone else."

It was everything she had feared, everything that voice inside her head had told her over and over again.

"I felt the same way, about myself I mean." Ann gulped, not wanting to start crying with Harris on the other side of the door. "I miss him terribly. I've been thinking about it a lot, every night…and I think it was a moment."

"A moment?"

"It was this one single moment when I could have chosen to stay on the path I was but instead I just crossed to the other one. I knew I was doing it and I knew it was wrong and I just…did it anyway. I tried to look back but that was it. I was gone." Ann sighed as she clenched her hands feeling that she had just bared her soul for the whole world to see.

They both fell silent and to Ann it seemed to go on forever. She could only breathe when Sue Ellen spoke again.

"I think I understand." She considered her for a moment. "I don't like it but I understand…"

Ann gasped as Sue Ellen continued.

"…and I think you have punished yourself enough. There's no need for you to tell me these things."

"Thank you." Ann almost jumped after being so anxious for her reaction and tears had started to well up in her eyes despite her best efforts. She brushed her friend's arm lightly and smiled with all her heart. "Thank you, Sue Ellen."

"I do wish things were different but they are what they are, and I need you in my life, Ann. So I believe we can get past this."

"We will, I swear." Ann tried to contain her excitement seeing as Sue Ellen's smile was quite weak but inside she felt lighter than she had in a long time.

"Just promise me one thing." Sue Ellen's voice was suddenly more chipper.

"What is it?"

"Don't say a word of this conversation to Harris. In fact, let him think his little plan failed." She smiled. "I'd like that."

"I think I can do that." Ann grinned, happy to have Sue Ellen back.

….

It was just the two of them now but things were different than they used to be. There was an air of openness in the room and they were both afraid to look at each other for fear of what their eyes might reveal. So many topics that they had quietly chosen not to discuss had popped up again, it was not only one elephant in the room, it was quite a few of them.

"So you actually listened to me this one time." Ann stated calmly as she glanced at him warily. They were both standing several feet apart.

Harris looked up from the floor and stretched his neck, hearing her and avoiding her all the same. He was thinking hard and Ann wasn't sure if it was a good sign. The moment he had stepped back into the room he had acted strangely, he didn't even have the last word with Sue Ellen but instead had just waved her off.

She thought back to Bobby's memorial service and how much things had changed between them and how they hadn't actually changed one bit. After her talk with Sue Ellen any kind of silence had started to feel unnecessary. She wanted to be able to talk to Harris that way too, to resolve things between them as well for it was the only way they could ever be at peace with each other.

She started to approach him and with each step he grew more distant but at the same time she noticed he was measuring her from the corner of his eye. He could never be completely indifferent towards Ann and it thrilled her but she didn't let that feeling rise to the surface. As she stepped before him he had no choice but to remain there but he still wouldn't look at her. What had happened to him?

"You brought Sue Ellen here, for me. I didn't think you cared how I felt." She tried with all her confidence.

His gaze lingered on her face for a moment before he turned his head again. He wasn't giving her anything and Ann wasn't going to settle for that.

"I wonder, Harris…about Emma. Why?"

He shifted uncomfortably.

"It can't have all been a lie. You cared for me and then you took the most important person in my life. With her you stole my life. I need to understand."

With that Harris was back, solid as a rock. He slowly turned his head to look at her with all the intensity his eyes possessed and his hand reached to touch her face. It had slipped from her mind what it did to her, to feel him on her skin and it made her tremble now.

"It's true…" He stroked her cheek softly, as if it brought certain things back to him. "…I did that to you."

With his hand touching her she was unable to tear her gaze away from the darkness that was the only thing that ever shone from his eyes. They concealed emotions that could only be found in his voice, and only by a very numbered group of people. Ann knew there was remorse for she had heard it that one time Harris had almost dropped Emma when she was a baby. He had then quickly put her in Ann's arms and told her he was going for a walk. That's when she had learned what it was, it was so different to everything else that came out of him and from then on every time she heard a similar tone to that voice, from absolutely anyone, she would think of Harris. She was scared of the things it did to her.

He cupped her face and let his fingers trace the outlines. They did it softly as if he was a man without vision painting a mental picture and she knew that no other man would ever look at her that way. Ann's mouth trembled as his touch got closer to her lips and her reaction brought new light to his face. He must have been smiling with his eyes. It was hard to tell for the rest of him remained so expressionless.

"I waited so long…" He closed his eyes as if he was talking to himself and at once Ann knew it was a rare opportunity to get something out of him. All she had to do was to keep herself together for a little longer.

"For what?" She asked softly but swallowed when his eyes opened only inches from hers.

"To see what it would do to you." He spoke matter-of-factly and it made her feel cold and heated at the same time. She knew this was not him trying to get to her. It was more like his words getting to him.

"And were you pleased?" She urged him on as much as it sickened her.

"I was…fascinated." He watched closely for her reaction but she was past being surprised by his answers. Only her gaze drifted from his' as she thought back to that day when she had come to him for answers. She had come because a part of her still hoped there was more to the story than simply his anger with her.

"You know why?" He asked still holding her face.

She looked into his eyes rage starting to burn in her gut but she didn't allow for it to overwhelm her. There were things she needed to hear and that need was stronger than her fury with him.

"Because you are rare, Annie…a once in a lifetime deal. Everything about you…" He slowly let go of her and turned away for a moment. Ann watched him as her heart beat rapidly. It dawned on her that he was everything she already knew he was, a sadist, and as big of a genius as he was a fool.

So how could he be so magnificent?

She was now aware of his every move, his feelings towards her, and seeing how he hastily turned back fumbling his beard in a nervous manner it was obvious he knew this. It gave her some joy knowing that his ability to read her mind for once wasn't such a fun ordeal to him but she held back the smile that was tugging at her lips. He was beginning to crack and it was marvelous. The way he tried to flash his teeth, it would not work on her. Oh he was angry but he knew unleashing it would only bring her higher.

_The desperation he must have felt…_

She had waited for this just like he had waited for her.

But his eyes were piercing and they seized her the moment she so carelessly bathed in the glory of her fleeting triumph. The moment was his to take and his lips landed on hers just like she had wanted from the moment his strong frame entered the room and silently laid his claim on her as it always did. It went on and on and the moment they broke apart for air he only gasped once before his words took her breath away again.

"Come here."

She had barely moved when his hands took hold of her back and neck bringing her closer to him in that insatiable passion she always felt from him. All his attention was on her lips as if kissing her was the only way he could truly express the rest of his thoughts he had been unable to voice.

She felt the ground shake beneath her feet and with each kiss that whirlwind of frightening sensations stirred her insides at a growing speed. She was out of breath, out of anything that could have held the power to keep her grounded. After everything he had done to her, the life he had shut down and brought out again, it amazed her how simply having his hands on her back now would make her react this way. They weren't trying to undress her, they were only pleased to have her in their possession.

And at that moment she would have done anything for him, but he didn't let her. Sliding his hands down her arms he eyed them with appreciation before their fingers intertwined with each other. Ann felt his lips leave hers and unintentionally she leaned forward a bit so that they were still touching slightly.

"Come, let's go downstairs and dance." His voice was heavy and it caged her completely. It took a moment for her to become aware of what he had said.

"You want to dance?" She was genuinely surprised. Either he had worked on his self-control or he was just testing her patience.

The smirk on Harris revealed it was neither of the above. His eyes travelled down from her head to her toes before they found their way to her soul again.

"The world should see this before I make a mess of it."


	15. I'm All You'll Ever Have

Harris knew it had to happen eventually but when it did it hit him with such force he had no way of preparing for. Ever since she had walked out on him 20 years ago he had been left with emptiness that could only be filled with hate whenever he heard her name being mentioned, which to his misfortune was often. For so long he had wanted to hate her but when she started showing up in his life more and more often he soon needed a different way to handle her presence. Ridiculing and torturing her had seemed like a valid option and he continued to do that until she started to break into tiny little pieces that Bobby would have to pick up. Harris knew he was not up for the task and so he had happily spent countless nights playing the possible scenarios in his head: Ann crying, Bobby trying to comfort her without a clue of what was happening and Ann never daring to admit the truth about Emma. It irked him that he couldn't keep the game going on for longer thanks to Ann's blackmailing.

How long could it have gone on had the unfortunate incident not occurred? Months? Years even? It was all he had thought of when Bobby came to him asking about Emma and Harris would have given anything to be in the same room with them when he was eventually forced to tell Ann the truth. Toying with her had been so satisfying but then again things had gotten a lot more fun after that.

Harris had always known that even when Ann remained with Bobby he could still make her want him beyond all her reason but he needed more than that. He needed for her to acknowledge it, to feel regret, shame and everything that comes with heartbreak, and after all that he needed for her to come to him and tell him what he already knew was true. But there were moments when all he wanted was for her to simply come close to him with no barriers, as if nothing had ever gone wrong between them. All the mixed emotions and vengeful plans had finally caught up with him the moment he failed to keep up the cold exterior. She had peered into his soul and on top of that it had to happen on the night she was wearing that dress. He had been weak and taken off guard and he wasn't sure if there was a way to go back anymore.

Going to a restaurant to dance had not been such a great idea either. He was holding a venomous creature in his hands and having all those eye witnesses around only seemed to give her more confidence in the fact that she was finally beating him. It had to stop. In fact had his mind been clear he would have easily found a way to make her uneasy but right now all he could think of was how her eyes were sparkling with life as they looked up at him, how her chest at times brushed against his and how those legs just weren't meant to be covered like that. As he tried to keep his expression neutral he thought about the most pleasant things they could do together, things that involved her mouth. He instantly felt better.

Minutes passed and the hand on his shoulder was getting too distracting making him wonder how long he could possibly keep this up before he would lose all self-control. She was getting closer than was necessary, giving him those long glances and he sure knew when he was being teased. However, this time it was a little too painful. He would get rid of that dress and show her who she was trying to mess with, if only he could get some time to clear his head first and unfortunately she was not giving him any.

When her leg brushed against his again in a very suggestive manner he decided it was time for action. Using the hand he had on her back he pulled her closer making it harder for them both to move but he didn't care. He then moved his hand up from the shoulder blade until his fingers were touching lightly on the spot where she had covered the mark. This seemed to evoke the desired reaction and he could tell she had tensed up. He was now close enough to whisper in her ear.

"Still don't know how to behave, do you Annie?"

"I do if I want to." She said playfully but with a hint of desire.

Harris chuckled at her quick reply and took her by the hand fishing for his phone with the other. He needed to get her out of the restaurant and into the limo as quickly as possible because enough time had been wasted already. Although he had to admit to himself that seeing all those looks of admiration casted to her direction had been quite pleasing. In the past it would have worried him but right now the only way for him to lose her would be not to another man but for his own mistakes, and he was playing to win. No one else stood a chance.

To his annoyance they were stopped on the way out by a woman whom Harris didn't recognize but judging by Ann's awkwardness and their quick exchange of words he guessed she must have been more of a friend of Bobby's than of Ann's. When he had finally managed to settle everything he ended the call and put the phone back in his pocket hoping to get Ann away from the unnecessary disturbance.

"I see you've moved on." The woman commented nodding at Harris and he at once noticed the change in Ann. Her face fell white but she quickly collected herself.

"Your perception astounds me." She spoke with such contempt in her voice that Harris could not help but be impressed. Now this would earn a reward. He stepped in.

"None of your business. Leave the lady alone." He put his arm on her waist possessively and guided her to the direction of the doors leaving the woman looking stunned by both of them.

"Miserable lowlifes." He mumbled under his breath. Ann didn't say anything but simply followed and Harris could practically hear all the thoughts whirl around in her head.

….

If her mind was occupied with happier thoughts for even a second somehow she would be brought down from the clouds, if not by her own guilt then by someone else's words. She couldn't get the Ewing Oil marketing manager's expression out of her mind, so flatly she had said those words as if she knew what she was talking about. It hit Ann again that no one else in the world completely understood how she felt about the situation and her part in all of it. She felt lonely and once more in need of a proper talk with Bobby, so that she could tell him how sorry she was for being so weak. There were many things she wanted to say but maybe he didn't want to hear a single one of them. She could picture him walking away, telling her to leave him alone like he always did when she had crossed the line. His face and the look on that woman's face flashed before her eyes giving her no peace but it felt right. They shouldn't leave her alone, especially when she was sitting beside that man on the back seat of a limo. She suddenly wished with all her heart that woman had slapped her. Lord knew she deserved it.

Feeling his hand rub her shoulder brought Ann back from the unpleasant thoughts. She numbly looked back at him.

"Let me take you back to my place." Harris said as if he was offering a cure for someone who was unwell.

She hesitated, not only because of the seriousness of the situation that had just dawned on her but also because something about that house gave her the creeps. Going there was as alluring as running into Judith's arms and knowing that woman had walked the corridors there was enough to make her shudder. She then thought of how hearing Harris's voice just now had made her feel warm. He was the only person who didn't question her actions or held any resentment towards her about the horrifying turn of events. She couldn't deny it was something she desperately needed, every minute of the day actually. Her own world was so bleak.

"You won't say no to me, Annie." His convincing words were somehow mirroring her messy thoughts.

Had he ever been wrong before? She couldn't remember anymore. All she saw was a man in love with her offering her a way out and no matter how much it killed her to want it that badly she knew she would be a fool not to take it.

He attacked her in that cunning way she didn't even realize it was happening until he was all over her, his hands at the back of her head and his lips on her neck while he fought to keep balance and at the same time tried to get even closer to her body. Her back sank deeper into the seat allowing him to take over her. It felt good to have someone know exactly what to do with her damaged soul and as his hands moved lower feeling her chest along with everything in their path she felt like smiling.

Suddenly he stopped and moved a little further, his hands reluctantly letting go in his wake. The unpredictability of his actions made her wary again.

"So what's it gonna be? Just say it."

He looked at her and with all her heart she wished he hadn't done it right at that moment.

That love was a bitch. It had a way of infecting people around it and she felt it all too strong, to the point she had to turn away from him. Those eyes were doing so many things to her, things they weren't allowed to. How dare they? She shook to her very core and his gaze told her the inner struggles had not gone unnoticed by him.

"You're fighting it. Why would you do that?" His voice was a mere whisper to her and she wasn't sure if he had actually spoken or if it was only her mind tormenting her again.

"Annie, I'm here. I'm not gonna go away."

If only she could have made him disappear for even a moment, it would have made everything so much easier. It was inevitable, impossible to run from. She decided to close her mind from all the doubts, the little voices that would never stop telling her there was something very wrong with what she was doing. She had chosen all the wrong options but somehow she felt she had ended in the right place. Maybe the guilt would forever follow her, even to those right places.

Forcing the thoughts out of her mind she moved closer to him and when she was near enough she leaned in kissing him on the neck. It was more as an apology because in her heart she felt she owed him one even though her mind was still trying to tell a different story. It wasn't a suggestive kiss but from the way his breathing became hitched she might as well have done something entirely different. He put his hand on her thigh, holding it a little more tightly than was necessary, and sighed deeply. She was now scared to lift her head, to even look at him because he was expecting words from her and she had no idea how to put any of her thoughts into coherent sentences.

….

She couldn't say it. She had to show him. But what was it that frightened her about him so much? It was as if she feared a beast would be let lose if she eased up on the reins. Overcome with emotion she wanted to jump on him in that hallway where he had taken her so many times before but in the end she could only place her hand on his shoulder making him slowly turn around. He looked at her that way again and she felt tightness in her stomach, unable to completely accept the way he was making her feel. He waited for her and her feet automatically moved towards him until she was past the point of no return once more. She took his patient face in her hands and kissed him the way you do when you have made a heartfelt promise to someone, it was possessive, encouraging and full of need. He was almost startled by her initiative which was very unlike him but he soon knew to take advantage of the situation.

"Annie, what are you doing to me..?" He pulled her closer gasping for air and gently pulling her hair with his other hand.

Her body curved into him feeling the warmth surge through her body, as if he was molding her into his special kind of conquest, bringing her skin ablaze with his energy to the point where she was burning up for just one touch from him. Ann didn't care where he touched her for she only wanted to feel him on her and she wanted him to know that. When she tugged at his belt the animalistic growl in her ear made her shiver just as much as she figured he must have. His lips found hers in one frantic move and his hands moved lower on her back until they squeezed her and pulled her even closer to feel every bit of him. Ann slid her hands down his shirt and was once again amazed by how strongly this affected him. He was clearly struggling to speak now.

"Are you gonna give me what I need?" He breathed into her ear after a little while.

She simply nodded, her hair brushing his temples as she bit her lip. It was clear to her what he meant.

"Good girl." He panted as his hand took hers into a firm hold and pulled her with him.

….

It was only when he had closed the bedroom door behind them that she realized just how intimate the situation had gotten. There were only the two of them desperately wanting to find release for what had been building up all evening and on top of that there were all those unspoken words. She was hoping he wouldn't ask her any hard questions tonight.

"You remember the last time you wore that dress?" He walked towards her in a very calm manner and she was immediately unsure of herself. Thinking about the past was something she had tried with all her might to avoid.

"I do."

"And you took it off before I…" He laid his hands on her chest, slowly moving them down his gaze following their trail but then his brows furrowed. No words were being spoken when he looked up again, right into her eyes. It was as if he was trying to say something but quite couldn't and Ann got even more nervous than she did when he actually was in control of the situation. Nothing and everything was happening all at once and neither one of them was taking the lead. She trembled wanting to hide until all the tension was gone. Harris sensed this and suddenly the familiar smirk was back on, but there was something beneath it. It was something she would try not to think about.

Ann felt the fabric loosen up as he slowly pulled the zipper on her back. She felt everything, the cool draft on her body, the warm breath on her cheek as he leaned closer, his thumb brushing the zipper's trail on her back. It was all magnified as it always was with him.

The dress fell to the floor and he was still working his hands slowly on her.

"The shoes too..." He mumbled holding her upper back. She stepped out of them and right away he got rid of her bra.

"Let's go." His words echoed in the room as he turned her around and guided her to the bed his hands on her waist, keeping her just close enough for her to feel him.

When they had reached the bed he traced the red mark on her neck with his lips and upon finding it kissed it softly.

"Get on this bed and don't stop until I say so. Is that understood?" His hands had slipped under her underpants and he was pulling them lower with each word.

"Yes." Her voice was hoarse after the long wait and she could feel him breathing harder on her neck. The panties fell to the floor and he turned her around before pushing her on the bed following right behind.

He was right above her his eyes blazing with all kinds of commands and she tried to keep eye contact while her hand made its way down her body. Something was stopping her and she couldn't quite figure out what it was. Her eyes closed as she tried to take a break from it all.

"Annie...just a little more." His tone was almost begging, clouded with arousal, and she felt suddenly very hot. When her eyes met his it was all the encouragement she needed to do what he had asked. Everything she did to herself, every sound that came out of her mouth made him crazier and it all showed on his face in that silent way only she could read.

He was on his hands and knees over her, watching intently as every stroke brought her closer. She thought of how it always used to give him such a thrill and she almost lost focus when he got on his knees and started undoing his pants. She was endlessly aroused by the idea that he would never get enough of seeing her like this.

When she was just about to lose it he leaned in, softly telling her to stop, and then pulled her up to the edge of the bed. There was no question of what he wanted but for a moment she remained still enjoying the sight before him. There was something magnificent about driving Harris Ryland to that point where it was all down to her to make him come alive. All the things she could do to him, she was still amazed. After trying to calm her breath she slowly took him in her mouth and his fingers slipped into her hair at once, feeling her and making sure she didn't stop.

"Annie…just like that…" He whispered out of breath as her tongue ran along him. His grip tightened with every trick she did on him and it made her heart race.

After a while he started to unbutton his shirt and she kept going, pulling him towards her and doing everything in her power to make him lose his mind. Judging by his breathing she had made it close but he then calmly laid the shirt on the bed and made her stop.

"I'm gonna watch you some more, Annie." He half grinned as he gently pushed her back to the bed stretching himself over her. They both watched each other while his hands ran down her body and she wondered how long he was going to make her wait. She could see he was searching for something in her eyes but only for a moment.

She continued to stroke herself and he got up to remove his pants but carefully watched her every move. Feeling his eyes on her made her shiver and she worked faster than she had intended. It was so powerful this time that her body had started to shake and drops of sweat were falling off her forehead. He was now approaching her and all she could hear was a whooshing sound in her ears as the room around her had begun to blur and it was impossible to tell where exactly he was at that given moment.

She was almost there when he grabbed her wrist putting her to a full stop.

"Not quite yet, Annie." He whispered under his breath laying her hand to the side. Then he touched her lips, brushing them with his thumb and she couldn't read his face at all. That man was a master at hiding his need most of the time.

His hand moved lower and as he pinched her nipple all she could do was to open her mouth in a silent gasp. She knew she was about to combust and he seemingly took every bit of pleasure in that. He did it to her again a little harder and she wished she would have been able to close her mouth but it was impossible. She was right there and she only wanted one thing. He on the other hand seemed to have all the time in the world as he moved his hand even lower torturously passing the place where she was burning up. It was all she could do not to scream when he stroked her thigh, his eyes were fixed on hers. She tried to keep her face still but she was certain even her eyes were trembling along with her lips.

"Oh hell, that's beautiful." He seemed in awe of her as his hand made its way back to her chest and she could only return that hungry gaze while the rest of her body desperately craved for more. For him that seemed to do it and he slowly lowered his body still watching her with fascination. Her legs shook as he moved her to his pleasing and the moment he had filled her Ann's eyes rolled back. No voice came out of her mouth until he had pushed a few more times and then it all came out in one single scream that didn't seem to take Harris by surprise.

"That's it…let it go." He had closed his eyes and she clasped onto his arms for her dear life as their bodies pressed together needing to feel every bit of one another.

She had barely had any time to recover when he already turned her on her side to enter from behind. His hand held her leg to keep her in place and she could feel everything he felt from the way his nails dug into her with each thrust. She leaned her head back into the curve of his neck and at that he growled pushing into her even more roughly. Their bodies were already sticking together and she could only move in unison with him. She felt his lips brush her cheek in that final moment before he pulled her into him with so much force she would have screamed again had it not been for that blurry haze she was in. Everything else in the world had ceased to exist except Harris and that indescribable pleasure that she had forgotten she used to enjoy so much in her younger days. It had been amazing and yet nothing even close to what they had now. Maybe she could somehow have everything again. There had to be a way she thought.

How greedy had Harris made her, she only now realized.


	16. Time Changes Everything and Nothing

"Ann!"

Emma gaped at them both from the bedroom door after having woken them up by entering the room rather loudly. Ann could only stare at her wondering how it was possible that this was happening again. Her daughter was faster to react and simply ran away.

Ann almost jumped out of bed but realized at the last minute she didn't have single item of clothing on and hastily pulled the covers back. It was all thanks to Harris that she had slowly started to let go of her everyday habits, such as putting on nightwear. She cursed him in her mind.

_Should be more careful. _

"Emma, get back here!" Ann's command ended up sounding more like a cry for help and Harris raised his eyebrows.

"I think our daughter could use a minute or two, don't you think Annie?" He received a hostile glance from her in return and rolled his eyes as if there was nothing out of the ordinary in the current situation. His calmness was enough to agitate Ann even further.

"I'll be in the kitchen!" Emma yelled at a safe distance and Ann figured it was probably for the best. In the light of morning things were looking much more complicated than they had the night before and even then she had been conflicted about where she was heading with Harris. Certain recollections were starting to fill her head and she tried with all her might to put all Harris related thoughts out of her mind.

"Just perfect." She sighed. "This was not how I planned to break the news to her."

"Ah Annie, it's as good as any time." Harris grunted as he got up and headed for the wardrobe. Ann watched him in thought and then looked around the room until her eyes landed on the dress that was on the floor.

_Dear God, I have a walk of shame waiting for me. _

"Harris?" She did her best not to sound desperate. "You happen to have something for me too?"

"I don't." He replied and then turned around. "But Judith might."

Ann's eyes widened in horror and she prayed he was just messing with her. His wink calmed her down.

"Oh ease up, Annie, I think I've got something in here." He pulled out a box from the wardrobe.

"You wanna come take a look?" He glanced at her over his shoulder before he got up and started putting clothes on.

A sudden feeling of shyness took over Ann as she watched him button his jeans facing his back to her. There was something very _normal_ about the way they were acting and she was not used to feeling so comfortable around him, in his house especially. She wrapped the blanket around herself and walked over to him to look for the promised clothes.

When she was right behind him he turned around abruptly and the seriousness of his expression flustered her. She stepped back staggering a little and in that moment Harris somehow managed to pull the blanket off her. He seemed to have taken in the sight of her in record time as she was being undressed with his eyes even though she already had nothing on.

"That's lovely, Annie." He brushed her chest with his finger smirking as if he was just about to get in action.

"Don't get any ideas." Ann replied firmly and crouched in order to dig through the box but could still feel his eyes on her back. The white fabric caught her eye and she pulled out what turned out to be a light robe. With another glance she noticed the content of the box seemed to be mostly dresses and gowns. She quickly put on the robe as she got up to follow Harris who was preparing to leave the room.

"Do I want to know how you happen to have these?" She asked from behind him.

"You really don't." He glanced at her and grinned. "Shall we?"

….

"Emma, what are you doing here?" Ann decided not to become a victim of the current situation. A little confidence would surely go a long way.

Emma gasped and could not get a word out of her mouth until she simply laughed gesturing at them both with her hand.

"Just answer the question." Harris said tiredly and Emma immediately stopped at that, confused by the whole situation.

"Have I missed something here?"

"That's possible." Harris commented before Ann quickly cut in.

"Are you taking those pills again? You've come here for daddy's stash?"

"You're the one to talk, seeing as you are here for daddy's…"

"That's enough!" Harris stopped them both sternly and the two women were left participating in some sort of a scary staring contest.

"Emma?" He started again.

"Just wanted to see you daddy, it's been a while." She said softly, putting on an angelic face for him.

Harris didn't seem to buy it but he eventually stopped looking for clues in his daughter's eyes.

"We can discuss this over lunch, but as you can see your mother and I will have to get ready first. So I'll call you in an hour, okay?"

"Oh she's _my mother_ now?"

"Emma…" He said with warning as she turned on her heels preparing to leave.

"I just wish I could erase this from my mind." Emma mumbled heading for the door and Ann suddenly remembered she hadn't even washed her face last night nor put on underwear that very morning.

_Just how see-through is this thing..?_

"Well I'm sorry to tell you but that's the way you came into this world!" Harris cheerfully called after Emma as the door slammed shut. At the same time Ann found a mirror and it didn't take her long to look away after seeing the horrifying sight. There was definitely nothing motherly, or classy in the image staring back at her.

It was confirmed when she saw the look on Harris's face in the mirror as he approached her from behind. She wished she had had time to make herself decent but apparently that was impossible with him in the house.

"Now what do you think you're doing, dressing like that when we're supposed to be talking to our daughter?" He sneered placing his hands on her waist and turning her around to face him.

"You think this is intentional? I swear the places your mind goes to sometimes, Harris..."

"Still doing the innocent dance, are you Annie?" He pulled the robe open taking her by surprise again.

Well two could play this game.

"You like what you see?" She gave him a seductive stare biting her lip and flipping her hair a little.

He grinned with approval.

"Well hold on to that thought because we have to get ready to see our daughter as the responsible parents I sure as hell hope for us to be one day." She tied the robe with determination and enjoyed watching his smile fade.

It had been so long since she had felt such strength. The last couple of days had turned her world upside down again but this time she was finally seeing the light clearly. It was bright and down the road there was Emma. Harris was probably somewhere too. She just needed to place him in the right spot.

"Teasing doesn't suit you very well, Annie."

"Too bad because you'll have to get used to it."

She passed him by sparing the victorious smile until she was certain he couldn't see her.

If Harris thought he had found his old puppet then he thought wrong. That puppet had started to learn new tricks from its master.

….

"So are you like together now?" Emma broke the silence that had turned uncomfortable from the moment they had all sat down and all too formally given their order to the waiter. The young man had practically run away from the icy breeze that surrounded the table.

Harris thought it was best to be straight-forward.

"You could say s..."

"NO." Ann almost shouted her reply and then by the looks of it was hoping for the ground to swallow her. When that little wish had failed she cautiously looked back at her daughter. Harris wondered if she had come up with a story that would make her look good and at the same time would belie everything that had happened between them in the past months. She still seemed to be under the impression he could never reach that pedestal of general greatness she stood upon.

"You're father and I...we are both going through...things. And that's why I was there last night." Ann stammered, more insecurely than she used to with him and Harris took notice of that.

_Not very far off then._

"You're trying to tell me you were just talking?" Emma seemed to be fighting the urge to laugh in Ann's face, an urge that was only being restrained by Harris's presence he thought. He didn't like it one bit even though he knew he could be held responsible for his daughter's attitude towards her mother.

"Can we just skip this part? We are all adults here." Ann sighed seemingly annoyed.

"We are? Cos you sure as hell have a funny way of teaching me." She was smiling cunningly and staring right at Ann whose pain was starting to show through the irritated surface.

"Leave it, Emma." Harris had had enough of the direction all their family discussions seemed to take now. He decided to lay some ground rules.

"If Ann asks you a question, you answer it. And if she answers your question, you listen. Is that clear?"

He could see the fury in Emma's eyes but regardless of his prior actions he was not going to let their daughter make fun of her mother. How he felt about Ann was his own torment, no one else needed to take part. Besides, Emma's lack of respect reflected poorly on him and that was something he could not accept.

Emma's face fell and she did not continue her interrogation but neither did she answer his question.

"Is that clear?" Harris pressed.

Now Ann seemed to be desperate to cut in but to his delight had more sense than that in the end.

Emma nodded in defeat. "Yes."

"Good girl." He casually answered taking a gulp of of his water and Ann's mouth fell open. It took him a moment to realize what had been the cause but when he did he almost choked and ended up coughing so loudly people were turning to look.

After he had recovered he wondered if he could have fun with that later but Ann was already wearing the don't-you-even-dare look that had started to scare him a little. Something had to be done about that. He in turn gave her a look that was reserved for very special occasions and Ann shifted in her seat trying to avoid him. It was just what he had hoped for.

"Maybe get a room?" Emma was watching them both nervously, ready to jump up and make a run for it at any second. Harris took pleasure in her discomfort for it kept her in her place.

"Oh but we did. You should learn to knock, baby girl."

Emma shuddered and then watched them both while trying carefully to choose her words.

"So is this how it's gonna be like? The three of us sitting together avoiding the elephant in the room?"

"And what might this elephant be called?" Ann seemed to assume the previous moment had proven things couldn't possibly get more awkward.

"That we were not a family for 20 years because daddy took me from you. You seem to be fine with that little detail now?"

"That's between your father and I, Emma." Ann said clearly regretting she had encouraged her.

"Yeah funny thing...I think that's between the three of us actually. I mean I was the one who was in the middle of all this, or have you forgotten about that already? Ancient history is it?"

"Emma..." Harris thought it was best he didn't try to stop the questions but he did feel she had gone too far. Ann looked more uncomfortable than he had seen in a while and that could not be good.

"So we're just never going to mention it again? Just trying to figure out the family rules so I can abide by them. That's what you want daddy, right?" Her voice was dripping with sarcasm and Ann seemed more interested in the white tablecloth.

Harris was already regretting the entire lunch, maybe even taking Ann to his house with him the night before. Taking her to his bedroom...his mind was racing. No, he definitely did not regret that last part.

"It's complicated, Emma." Harris started. "Ann and I have talked about it and it's all resolved now."

Ann suddenly raised her head and Harris could not tell what she was thinking exactly but something about it made him nervous.

"Must have been one hell of an explanation." Emma stated as their food arrived. When she started eating her parents engaged in a silent discussion which Harris felt he was quickly losing.

_Author's note: I'd like to thank __Mrs. Fillion for suggesting a chapter involving Emma. It was so much fun to write and worked well into the story:) And a million thanks for all the reviews! _


	17. You're a Lonely Soul

There were no pictures in Ann's West Village apartment, no paintings either. She felt the empty surfaces reflected her state of mind for they were now clean and prepared for anything. A single gun was hidden in her nightstand drawer, just the way she liked. It was a new calm, free of memories and distractions and being in that serene space felt good.

_Should have done this months ago._

Ann looked out of the window and thought of Harris. How he must have hated that she was keeping him at an arm's length and completely in the dark of her plans. It was a necessary precaution because she knew he would only mess with her head and absolutely nothing would get done as long as she continued to spend her days with him. It had been weeks since she had felt his touch and she missed it more than she dared to admit even to herself, which was why she had tried her best to not think about it at all. She had kept busy and tonight she would be tested. Could it all come together, her life and Harris in it? She kept hoping something would change. There had to be a way to fix the damage from the past so that she wouldn't feel that underlying urge to despise him, to get revenge. It wasn't healthy and she knew she had to let it go eventually if she was to ever find peace of mind.

...

The times of sneaking up on her at Southfork were over. Harris knew that showing up at her door unannounced would only cause more damage now and so he had decided to respect her wishes, to a certain point. There were places where Ann didn't wish to be respected and he was ever so glad for that. It was what bound them together and he knew she would never find a man to both love and give her that right amount of disrespect. Any poor soul who tried would most likely end up jumping off a cliff before they would ever find out what it was that made her want them in that one true way, one that leaves no room for doubt. Bobby had known he could forever keep her but never truly have her and for a man who had never allowed her to fully have him either it had been enough. Harris however had never been the one to settle.

Now here he was, at Ann's door, invited and completely clueless as to what was waiting for him on the other side. He knew the day she had left Southfork because news travelled fast but everything about her thought process was alien to him these days. It wasn't like him to voluntarily stay in the dark about such important matters but he felt he had no choice. He was up against something very different than what had been his Annie almost a year ago when she had visited him and so reluctantly allowed herself to be reminded of what they could have shared had other obstacles not come their way. Harris hoped she had thought things through wisely, not clouded by excuses or other people's opinions, or that guilt many talked about but he himself never quite understood. Life could be so easy if people gave up these emotions that were never of use to anyone but those, such as Bobby, who were long gone.

He rang the doorbell hoping for the best but as soon as the door opened it dawned on him how unprepared he had been for the beauty of her. Every rational thought escaped his mind and only the urge to push her against the wall remained. She was wearing tightly fitted jeans and a white top that hang loosely and everything about the combination made him want to give her a very loud and an inappropriate compliment but he kept quiet and let his trained eye take it all in very subtly.

"Evening, Ann." He presented her with a bottle of scotch knowing she didn't care for it very much but he hadn't wanted to make it seem like he was trying to buy her off after all the recent tension.

"Interesting choice of a present. You trying to get me drunk?" She joked holding the gift and flashing a smile that distracted him but only for a second or two.

"If I wanted to get you drunk I would have brought you something else. I remember those tequila sunrises..."

"That was just one night! And I barely remember any of it." Ann quickly defended herself, if it could be called that.

"Oh I think you do. All that tequila on your..." He looked at her suggestively and those big eyes revealed the drunken night from 20 years ago was very much imprinted on her memory.

"Fine! Fine...just don't think we're gonna get that messy here. I've barely finished decorating."

He smirked, his mind on the visuals she had just provided him with, and then continued on a more serious tone. "So anyway, that's for your cabinet, give it to anyone you want to talk into doing something. Worked for me on quite a few occasions."

"Oh the repertory you have. I did always admire your wisdom." She smiled. "Would you like to have a drink?"

"Why of course. Whatcha got?"

She held up the bottle. "This would seem like an appropriate choice."

….

"Legal advocacy?" Harris had not expected to hear any of the things she was saying now. They were sitting on the couch and he was trying hard to get through the conversation because in his mind he was already unbuttoning her jeans. The couch was a little too small but he would make it work. The thoughts just wouldn't leave him alone and he cleared his throat hoping it would shake him back to where they were.

"Yes, now that I'm financially secure..." She paused, apparently considering the meaning behind those words and then picked herself up again. "...I figured the least I could do is spend my time on something of value. So I'm going to help women go through the court proceedings, more as a friend than as a legal advisor really."

"And these women are..?" He had already guessed the answer to that but in order to win some time to process it he kept the conversation flowing.

"Victims of abuse, it's something I feel very strongly about and can relate to as you very well know."

_Quite a blow. Where is she going with this?_

He was starting to feel rather uncomfortable but due to his curiosity the question had to be asked.

"You consider yourself to be an abused woman?"

"I do, Harris."

He couldn't help but laugh at that and even when he saw the anger in her eyes the smirk wouldn't leave his lips. She just couldn't let anything go, could she?

"All the pain you caused me for almost half a lifetime and _you laugh_?" She tilted her head and her eyes narrowed, almost as it she would blow up into pieces at any second. Signs such as those were never enough to scare him off. It was almost like a challenge to him.

"We've both made mistakes, Annie, but you're the one still holding onto the past. Just let it go."

She was the one laughing now. It was that high pitched, sort of crazy laughter he had only ever heard back when she was strung out on pills and discovered something in her hand that she thought she had lost. When people get to that place they can easily be comforted by the simplest of things and that theory had worked for him quite some time. He wasn't sure why he thought it still would. It wasn't like he had any pills to hand out now.

"If you want to move on with your life you will have to forgive me for…whatever these things are that you're clinging to." As he spoke he thought her head might actually explode. She had definitely gone to the crazy side. Some things never change.

"Forgive you? Forgive…?! YOU NEVER EVEN APOLOGIZED!"

Her outburst stunned Harris and suddenly the words got stuck in his throat, allowing her to vent on.

"You're a coward, that's what you are. You don't even understand what I'm saying because you never had the courage to face what you did to me. You just happily wait for me to let it go. Well guess what? I can't, and sometimes I still wish I had killed you!"

_Oh she has some nerve._ Harris didn't buy a word of it.

"Now there's a ship that's sailed." He whistled.

"Across the ocean and back, Harris."

He rolled his eyes desperately wanting to get the conversation on the right track but there was no stopping the woman.

"I'm trying to understand, Harris, to make sense of this but you just make it so hard. You abused me, you stole a part of my life just because you could, you messed with Sue Ellen, you put me through hell with Emma again...you find my weak spots and keep using them against me for your own pleasure."

Harris was about to protest but he didn't get a chance as she went on.

"And yes I admit I've taken pleasure in it but that doesn't change the fact you don't care what is here." She pointed to her heart. "It all comes down to what you want and my own life stands as an everlasting joke to you. What I do doesn't matter when it doesn't involve you. Given the chance, every single day these past 20 years you've done nothing but hurt and manipulate me over and over again." She stopped to take a deep breath as if all the air had escaped from her lungs.

Her words stung as he thought back on those years. Pain was all he could remember and maybe it was time she knew that.

They were facing each other now, hurt visible in their eyes and for a little while they could only stare at one other thinking of all the reasons behind the events that had led them there. It had gone too far and he had to let it out no matter how weak it made him feel.

"Believe me, every one of those days I've loved you."

"Don't…" She lost her breath again.

"What? Can't take it now?" He had expected for that reaction and it infuriated him just as much as he thought it would. When she looked away some of that old rage raised its ugly head, reminding him why he had avoided this conversation for so long. All that remained was the truth.

"You've known it's true for a while now and you just love to keep messing with me but you can't actually stand to hear it now can you?"

Ann still kept quiet and tried to back away but Harris took her face in his hands and made her look at him. She was clearly aware of what that might do to her and it was the only reason he was able to keep his tone down.

"Who's the coward now, huh?"

They remained in that position for a while until Harris let go and stood up. He was beginning to realize that certain things couldn't be erased and no matter how many times she succumbed to him it would still be there. He was tired of fighting a battle that was impossible for anyone to win.

"It's okay, Annie." He sighed. "It is what it is." He had to steer his gaze away in order to clear his mind, to find a way to go from there. There had to be a way, of that he was sure. It was only blocked by the trash they had left in their wake. He would try common sense, surely she still possessed some of that.

"He's not gonna come back, Annie. You know that, don't you?" Harris hated bringing up the topic but he knew where her mind was at and so he might as well say it. There was only silence and it made a part of him ache.

_She just can't let anything go._

He turned around and his heart started to race at the sight of her still sitting on the couch her legs crossed and hair falling on her face that she was trying to hide from him. Desire surged through him as he tried his hardest to stay composed and not march over to take her right there and then, knowing he very well could have. He used to think it was enough to know that she wanted him and that for him she was willing to break all her moral codes but those things didn't cut it anymore. He needed for her to see it the way he did.

"It's over, that life you had. Nothing you can do about it." He said it watching her with an insatiable hunger that didn't know time or a place.

"I know that." She whispered keeping her head low and it gave him a strange warm feeling. No matter how much it irritated him that she held onto things that were long gone it also affirmed him that she was not so quick to run away. Here she was, fighting the pain that kept her restrained and she wasn't going to give up.

He walked back and noticed how she tensed up when he sat right next to her. Her fingers were clutching at her knees as she breathed heavily and slowly lifted her gaze. The bright eyes once again reminded Harris of the vision she was no matter what she went through. He stroked her hair in amazement and those eyes moved wildly proving she was never as far away as she claimed to be.

"You made me crazy and that made me lose sight of a lot of things. And maybe you are right..." Harris thought back to the day Ann had opened up in court and how for a moment he had been aware of the pain she had gone through but that had faded with the physical pain that stung in his side. He had decided not to sacrifice one more thought for the woman who would be forever unattainable anyway.

"If I could go back I would change a lot of things. So…I'm sorry now. "

Harris saw the shock on her face she so clearly tried to hide and he figured his vague apology had hit the right spot. It wasn't that he didn't mean it. He just wasn't sure which part of his and Judith's deal he was supposed to feel sorry for because it had been a complicated matter and he still at times felt he was being played by his mother.

"You are?" She stammered. "This is not some new way to get into my pants?"

_Please, it's not that hard._

He managed to keep the thought to himself and only nodded.

"And it's a great thing you're doing, giving your time to others. The likes of me may run the world but we will always need people like you to fight back."

The look on Ann's face was priceless but she refrained from giving him any clever comebacks, much to his disappointment.

"I wish I didn't care so much for what you think." She spoke with a little sadness in her voice and he believed she really did mean it. It was as satisfying as it was tragic but he could see it now. She was slowly coming back and she would be stronger than ever. All she needed was a little push and maybe he would allow for it to happen now, to let her know what she really was in his eyes.

"You're a fine woman Annie. You don't need my approval."


	18. Just Say It

_Author's note: We've come to the last chapter, which is a little longer. Thank you for reading, my reviewers and anyone else who might have stopped by. :)_

Very few people's opinions had ever bothered Harris Ryland. He didn't let anyone outside his family get under his skin, would not spare a thought on words said by an outsider that was never to be of any use to him. That was why he was so taken aback and quite frankly irritated when his final conversation with Bobby Ewing would not leave him alone. Maybe it was because the words had most likely been his last on this earth and those tend to mean something.

"_You soulless son of a bitch...Would you come on out." _

"_Now Bobby, Bobby…why would I do that? Time to face the facts, there's absolutely nothing you can do."_

_"There are a lot of things I could do, like rip your face off for a start."_

_"And then what? Annie's already been taken care of so..."_

"_NO! You...you stop right there, Harris. You don't deserve her."_

"_Neither do you."_

"_I know. And that's the monumental difference between you and I."_

He wasn't supposed to crash. None of the things that happened from then on were supposed to occur but they did and in the end they were probably for the best. Ann had fallen to the bottom with him and slowly dug herself up. She had been built into a new woman from scratch and he had no fear of losing her now. At least that was what he kept telling himself whenever he heard Bobby's voice in his head saying some of the most truthful things he had ever been forced to listen to.

He had wished he would come to his house, catch them in the act, literally, and make Ann admit what she had done. After a while Harris thought he must have had chickened out and it had been fine with him then. He should have known Bobby wouldn't put his wife into such a humiliating situation no matter how badly she asked for it. What the charitable and ever so righteous man wasn't supposed to do was stay inside his head preaching to him for all eternity. Ah fate could be so cruel.

He opened his eyes to return to the present which was a much nicer place, there were only the two of them after all.

It was a lovely home, needed a bit of an edge though. How Ann could give out that bland housewife look from every detail of her life when she wasn't even one for a start was quite the mystery. He would make sure to change that.

Harris stretched his neck anxiously as he waited for Ann to come back from the shower. They had previously agreed that he would spend the night but after their rather colorful conversation about their whole history earlier that evening he decided to play it safe, as much as it sickened him to resort to such powerless tricks. In his mind there was a wide variety of options when it came to Ann and the most pleasing one was to test how long it would take for him to turn the overthinking mess into a hot one, to see those judgmental eyes roll back after a few words of encouragement from him. It was what he usually did and from the way she responded to him it was obvious she had missed being handled that way. That was where one of his many talents lay and yet here he was lying in bed in his T shirt and pants, waiting for her to come to him as if it wasn't enough she already held the home field advantage. He must have been getting softer with age.

The door opened and there she was, approaching him in a red silk robe that flew momentarily around her and then slid back a little with every step she took, purposely teasing him with only glimpses of her divine legs. He kept his face under strict control and only gave her a little grin to show that it was indeed lovely to see her. She nodded without a hint of a smile as she stopped by his side and turned the bedside lamp off leaving the room dim apart from the light that came from outside. His heart skipped a beat but his mind told him to calm down and watch how the scene would play out. Anything with Ann in not much clothing was worth all his attention.

He faced another challenge when she walked to her side of the bed and dropped the thing on the floor in a flash. There was absolutely nothing underneath. It had been weeks but it felt like years now and the suffocating pressure inside of him was escalating rapidly. He didn't know where to look or what to say. The moment he had said out loud how he felt his carefully built exterior started to shatter and it terrified him because he knew there was no plan B now. It was either to have her or nothing at all in the whole universe. What a high price to pay for contentment, one could only deal with that once in 20 years.

She lay down on her side keeping her eyes fixed on his which was an easy task for he could not move an inch, scared to break what was all too perfect to be more than a mere illusion of his desolate mind.

"I've been thinking, Harris, and I think it's time you did some nice things."

"What's that?" He could hear the words come out of her mouth but they made no sense to him when her body glistened so brightly in the moonlight, every curve enhanced. He wondered how it would feel like to turn her over, grasp that hair and make her yell something not very ladylike as he fervently buried himself into her. Oh she was definitely doing this on purpose. She had practically hypnotized him as he could not shift his gaze.

"I want Ryland Transportation to start a charity." She spoke softly, not even blinking and he could barely breathe when those eyes were so focused on him. He was certain he would always have this visual in his mind whenever the company name was mentioned again. The two words had never sounded sexier, not coming from any of his secretaries at least.

"A-hum..." He tried to stay serious but his lips were curving into a smile when he thought of all the things he needed to do to her, some in a slow manner, some a lot faster, and maybe she could give him a little business talk while they were at it.

"Are you listening to me?" Her tone indicated she already knew the answer and the reason behind it. Her eyes were practically burning into him.

"Always, Annie. Always."

She smiled knowingly. "This charity would be in your company's name and your clients would be given the opportunity to donate whenever they're dealing with you. And that money would go to the shelter obviously."

_Well ain't she still full of surprises._

"That's what it's going to take for you to forgive me, to have my name involved in this charity for abused women?"

"Yes Harris, that's what it's going to take."

"Then Annie, that's what I shall so."

"Really?" She grinned mischievously and Harris had a good feeling about that. Her smile was brighter than ever, her every movement more confident, even her hair seemed to move differently when she pulled the covers and climbed on top of him. There was a sparkle in her eyes that remained there even when her smile faded upon meeting his gaze. He knew she had realized it now. He also knew she wouldn't say it, but the fact that she knew it was enough for now.

It had been smoldering inside him long enough and seeing her like that was where the inevitable burst started. He touched her jaw and felt the heat on her skin but there was also a little quavering there.

_Oh Annie...just perfect._

His heart was pounding in his ears with each sweet but painstakingly slow second his hands gently traced her hot cheek until he reached further back and took a fistful of hair with force that was the complete opposite to his earlier moves. He pulled her head back admiring the bare chest that was left in the view. She didn't even try to fight what must have been an uncomfortable position for her.

_Serves her right._

His breathing was ragged but hers was more of a whimper when his other hand kept feeling everything that was so freely available for his taking.

"When I said I love you..." His fingers dug into her and what they were met with was very pleasing to him. Her chest heaved with each slowly intensifying stroke.

"...it means I will do anything..." He removed them quickly to pull his pants a little lower all the while still holding her by the hair. There was something animalistic about his craving at that moment.

"...but so will you." He pulled her down on him by the hips and laid his head back savoring the long anticipated release that was in his grasp again.

And then he let her take him, allowed his innermost feelings to shine through. The whole time she was on him he was transparent and she watched him with attentive eyes, unafraid of anything that lied beneath her. She was fire and ice, beautiful beyond anything he had seen. The moment must have overwhelmed her because her pace eventually started to get slower and her breathing was soon nothing but a loud mixture of many beautiful sounds that had echoed in his ears for a long time. Ann never could give a ride as rough as she so desperately wanted and so it was time for him to take over.

He lifted his upper body to kiss her, pushing himself more and more upwards with the aid of his hands until she had completely surrendered to him, wrapped her arms around him to hold him up and returned his kisses with nothing but sheer greed.

_Oh my sweet, crazy little Annie. You're in for quite a treat. _

Their hands were desperately pulling each other's bodies closer until they were both struggling to breathe. Harris was the first to let go but only to push her down. There was no real direction in his motions, all he saw were those eyes and the satin sheets and everything felt good and right. He wasn't his usual self anymore for every action was now guided by a primal urge instead of fear of losing it all in a blink of an eye. By the look and sound of it Ann didn't seem to mind the roughness one bit.

"Harris..."

"Tell me, Annie."

"You are amazing."

She then sank under him and allowed him access everywhere, not caring if there were marks or however hard he tugged at her hair, how loud he was by her ear and to Harris it was all he had ever lived for.

….

Emma placed the wooden picture frame on the living room shelf and stood staring at it for a while but no matter which way she tried to put it none of it made any sense. As far as she knew her parents were on the road for disaster and they must have been aware of that.

_But then again nothing in this family is right anyway._

She had taken the picture after the weird lunch they had had a couple of months ago, not from her own will but because her father had cornered her and she couldn't risk getting on his bad side. There were still things she needed from him.

In the shot Ann had her arm on his shoulder, holding him like she had it all figured out. He on the other hand looked a little soft. It was as if the roles had been reversed and Emma was certain she didn't want to know half of the things that had happened between the bizarre couple. Mostly she tried to avoid them as it was impossible to have a normal conversation with the three of them in the same room. Her father kept taking Ann's side and even though there was a time when Emma would have been glad for that, this was too much. She wished they would have gone back to hating each other because now there was a chance they might start interfering in her life and she had been so enjoying the newly found independence. She sighed and snapped her purse open taking the flask out. The room full of people attending Ann's housewarming party wasn't enough to stop her.

Harris's eyes didn't miss a thing but he wasn't going to make a scene there and instead tried to calm his breath.

_That dimwit in a dress is not the woman I raised. No class, no self-control..._

He briefly wondered if Ann would have done a better job but then almost laughed out loud. No, Emma was definitely more than most people could handle. If she had grown up with Ann she probably would have been run over by a train or something similar by now. No wonder his authority had suffered in his daughter's eyes after they had gone public with their relationship. He made a mental note to later punish Emma for all this in some way and then turned his attention back to the conversation he had been having with one of Ann's charity cases.

Everyone loved Ann but this woman seemed to idolize her. He had heard Ann talk about her a lot in the past few weeks and so he decided to find out if his initial intuition had been correct, that she was just too emotionally invested for this kind of work. Deep down he wished he was wrong because as much as he loved controlling Ann at times he also hoped she had grown into a rational woman that could not be easily shaken. That was how he liked for people to see her, the envy of everyone, and he was happy to see so far he seemed to have been proven wrong.

If you left out the fact Ann had clearly failed to inform the woman on some details about her personal life.

"She's so...empathic. But also...I don't know. She's such a beautiful woman I don't know why she'd allow herself to stay in a situation like mine. She must have held all the world in her hand and she let one man break her. I would really love to meet that man, to see what he's like."

"You think he would still be the same 20 years on?" Harris commented with a tone that sounded absent-minded, yet was anything but. At the same time Emma disappeared from his sight.

"People don't change. Their actions might but the soul...how should I put it...?"

"It stays pretty constant, doesn't it?" The turn of the conversation outweighed his annoyance with his daughter.

"Yes, exactly. You are what you are and only your actions can define you." She lifted her glass as if there was a newly found understanding between the two of them and Harris tried not to chuckle. People who overestimated their own intelligence always provided the well-needed comic relief in his life.

"You are one wise woman but tell me what if...what if it was only for those actions that failed this man in the past?"

She looked at him with sudden realization, a little terror in her eyes. It was a golden opportunity not to be missed and so he took it hoping this woman would soon be out of their lives anyway.

"Do you think there would be hope then?"

She only gasped and Harris was happy to see he had not lost his ability to shock the most rational seeming people. Maybe there was hope for a lasting future since even this woman was failing to make sense of what had happened between them. It was stronger than any practical theories and deep down he had always known that.

From the other side of the room Ann watched Harris and Janet in total bliss. What a fine man she had, not a trace left of the monster she used to see him as. There was a lot of excitement in her these days and she could barely contain it anymore. It was time to show him around and put an end to all the gossip. Of course most people didn't like that she had moved on so fast and with him, not that they knew of the affair, she liked to think they didn't, but for the most part she didn't care about their opinions anymore. She was making something out of her life again and being with Harris was never going to define her.

The only person she would ever talk to about her late husband came to stand on her side and Ann's teacup suddenly clattered against the saucer. Sue Ellen had a way of silently reminding her of the abhorrent things she knew she would never get over but she had accepted that. She would make up for them for the rest of her life and it was perfectly fine.

"I must say I never saw us standing in the same room together, apart from court, but life sure has an interesting way of working out." Sue Ellen nodded at Harris who was on the other side of the room charming everyone in his way. She felt coldness creeping up her spine remembering how she was once just as oblivious to his means.

"It does, doesn't it?" Ann happily ignored the reference to their past and continued. "I know it doesn't make sense but it feels right."

There was an air of tension around the two of them when the obvious was being confirmed in both Ann's eyes and voice. With a heavy heart Sue Ellen decided to let go of the last bit of hope that what she had been witnessing was just a phase.

"You are ridiculously in love with him. I see that now."

The cup almost fell off Ann's hands but she recovered just in time. She felt the blush on her cheeks where Harris so loved to touch her when things started to get heated and remembering that only made it worse, not to mention she couldn't stop smiling.

"My God Ann..." Sue Ellen stopped abruptly when she realized Harris was right beside them. There was something off about him she thought.

_That's right, he's smiling like a normal person._

"Sue Ellen! So good to see you here." He was shaking her hand before she even noticed what was happening. It was a normal handshake, not a moment too long to make her feel uncomfortable which had been his trademark during their earlier encounters.

She expected him to at least continue with a snarky remark and didn't respond until it was clear that was all he had to say. It was all a little too amicable but she decided to play along.

"It's so good to see you too." She flashed him her Oscar worthy smile.

They both smiled at each other in a way that would have looked friendly to anyone else but Ann was afraid they were just waiting for the right moment to skin the other alive. She appreciated the effort even if it was a little frightening.

"Harris, can I speak with you?" She nodded at Sue Ellen. "Excuse us."

They moved further into the kitchen and Sue Ellen was left at the buffet wondering why Ann had been so shaken by her observation. She picked up a mini cupcake that was sprinkled with tiny hearts and figured maybe the great ones always gave that effect, especially when you've met them young. Once she bit into it the excessive sweetness took over her taste buds and she became a little depressed over the lack of barbeque antics.

Before she could get any ideas about the punch bowl Emma appeared on her side eyeing the selection on offer.

_Oh well it probably would have been nothing but fruit juice anyway._

"Your father makes quite the effort to please me. Any idea what he's up to?" She reckoned the girl could be just as unpredictable as her father and therefore might even give her something.

"That's my daddy alright. He likes to keep his women close and his enemies even closer. Enjoy it while it lasts." She took a mini meatball flashing her an evil smile that seemed to come with the Ryland genes and flipped her hair as she walked away. Sue Ellen could already tell she was never going to like the girl even if she possessed some of that cunning wit she had always loved in Ann.

From the corner of her eye she could see Harris watching them. It didn't seem that way but she knew that's what he was doing and he seemed happy with what he saw. She didn't know what to think of that. Maybe he was just trying to keep her on her toes, the king of the jungle always needed someone to stomp on.

_Well if you look on the bright side, life will surely never be boring._

"Harris, come with me." Ann snapped him out of his thoughts which revolved around her and Sue Ellen. Why the friendship between the two women interested him so much he had no idea. Maybe it was because, he believed, they mostly talked about him.

She took his hand and pulled him with her, a surprising turn of events and he tried not to think about how firmly her little hand was grasping his and how nice her grip felt in other areas of his body. No, he would not think about that at all.

They ended up in the bedroom and he didn't want to try at all anymore. The muffled sound of the guests was heard through the door but to him they were far enough. He pulled her in for a kiss his hands roaming her body until she very quickly made him stop.

"No, Harris…listen to me." Her eyes landed on his chest but he felt she really wanted to look up. He crunched down a little to see her face.

"Well Annie?" He asked making her laugh and turn around in nervous manner. For a bit he wondered if she had actually lost her mind but when they were face to face again all he could see was what had always been there, love and madness.

"I am sorry, I hope you know that." She said it quickly and faintly.

"For what?" He was getting worried and tried to keep his eyes on hers so that he wouldn't miss anything. The stronger she became the harder it was for him to read her but there was also something so very captivating about it.

"For pulling the trigger, what else?" Her body language told him she was irritated for being forced to say it.

Harris laughed with relief. "I know, you told me already."

"When?" She looked scared now and it reminded him of how much fun she could be.

"In bed..." He took a moment to take her in again. "...almost a year ago. Doubt that you realized it though. And besides, I didn't need for you to tell me that because I would have known anyway."

"How?" She gasped, still a little confused.

"You know how." He saw the fear in her eyes mixed with realization and it was all too arousing. What a torture the waiting was.

She put her hand on her chest and her knees buckled but Harris took her by the arms keeping her in balance and pulled her a little closer.

"Just say it, Annie. You'll feel so much better."

She slowly lifted her head again, her expression serious and eyes shining brighter again.

"Yes, I love you." Ann's voice trembled and it made him desire her even more.

_Finally._

The final weight was lifted and Harris grinned letting the words sink in. She felt so light in his arms now and he wanted to lift her up and push her against the wall. Such a good thing she was wearing a dress.

"Manners, Harris! Not here. I'm the hostess after all." She replied sensing his thoughts and he wrapped his arms around her not even close to being defeated by her resistance. The hug would get him through the party.

"I will never hurt you again." He whispered in her ear and felt her fingers dig into his lower back. The touch told of many things, some of passion, some of longing, some of regret, and it all made him shiver down to his toes.

"I think I always did love you in some way, I..." She breathed into his neck. "...it wasn't always the right way but it was there. I tried to kill it but it was just too inflammable."

He ran his hand through her hair loving every second she spent leaning into him. It was the most relaxing pastime in the world.

"I've waited for this." He groaned feeling the silky hair brush against his cheek. There was simple purity in that moment they shared and even though he couldn't handle that kind of vulnerability for more than a short period of time he allowed himself to get sentimental for this occasion. He took in her scent as his voice lowered with every throbbing beat of his heart.

"Loved you for so long."

She responded by hugging him even tighter and he used all his willpower to keep his mind off the things he wanted to do to her. There was no hope for him with this woman.

After a while there was a knock on the door and they both reluctantly came back to reality.

"I know I told you two to get a room but this was not what I had in mind. Can you _please_ come out already?" Emma sounded a little scared on the other side and they both burst out laughing.

"In a minute." Harris called out. "But Ann and I do appreciate that you've learned to knock."

They could both practically see the look on her face through the door before the sound of footsteps told them their daughter had decided to put some distance between them again. Harris broke the hug and as he glanced at Ann's beaming face a thought occurred to him.

"You don't cry anymore, I've noticed."

Ann looked at him contemplatively before she replied, happiness still in her eyes.

"Maybe I've run out of reasons to cry."

_The end._

_Author's note: Thank you so much marysunshine81, Angel Heart Princess, AnnHarrisForever and Wicked Pen for all your reviews and encouragement, couldn't have done it without you! I still can't believe I managed to make this last for 18 chapters, it really is thanks to all the inspiration I got from you here and from our chats on Twitter. Love you!_

_This was not how I planned to end it originally, in fact I was just going to have Ann stay with Bobby but obviously that couldn't happen at some point so then I thought it would be a fun challenge to see how it could actually work out between Ann and Harris. A lot of analyzing went into it but challenges are fun:D Thanks for reading, it's been such a fun ride and I'm pretty sure I'll write more for them when I get ideas:)_

_The songs that mostly inspired me with writing this were "(Say) All I Need" by One Republic (I think that pretty much covers the whole story) and then also "You Know My Name" by Chris Cornell, Dark Paradise by Lana del Rey and Explosions by Ellie Goulding. I've named the chapters after the lines from those songs:)_


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